Marik and Bakura: 333 Ways
by sailorblaze
Summary: After discovering the 333 ways to get kicked out of Target, Marik drags Bakura into a crazy attempt to embarrass the Pharaoh. Abridged Personalities. LOOK AT LATEST CHAPTER FOR FATE OF THIS STORY.
1. In Which Our Tale Begins

_**Hello, everyone, and welcome to (finally!) my first Yu-Gi-Oh fanfic! Now, this came about because of the 333 ways to get kicked out of Walmart (I'm using Target in this story, because I haven't been to Walmart enough times to form a clear picture.). And I realized: Marik and Bakura should have a go at this! I'm using the Abridged counterparts for this story. And I will also give permission for LK/CardGamesFTW to do a dramatic reading.**_

_**Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by Little Kuriboh.**_

"Hey Bakuuuura!"

Bakura looked up from his book, and turned towards Marik's general vicinity. "Marik, what did you do now?"

Marik grabbed a list out of the printer, and waved it in Bakura's face. "THIS, Bakura, is what we're going to do!"

Bakura snatched the list, and read the title. "333 ways to get kicked out of Target... Marik, are you bloody kidding me?" Marik shook his head. "Then, pray tell, what will this accomplish?"

Marik jumped onto the couch next to Bakura. "Don't you see, Bakura? With this list, we will be able to embarrass the Pharoah as many times as possible! Then, he will surrender to us, and he'll have to admit defeat!"

Bakura started, "So, you mean..."

"YES, Bakura," Marik diabolically proclaimed, "We will finally defeat Yugi Moto, once and for all!" He then glanced at the list. "Now, let's see. Number 1: Take someone's shopping cart and switch the items with stuff from the person next to them's cart. Sounds easy..."

Bakura sighed. This was going to be embarrassing. Very, very embarrassing.

The Marikmobile pulled up to the nearby Target, swerving around, and nearly hitting several cars. Bakura and Marik stepped out, and walked into the entrance of Target. Bakura then pulled out a notepad, where he had written all of the 333 ways down. "Now, all we have to do is find the Pharoah," Marik proudly announced.

Luckily, that wasn't so hard at all. Yami was in the Men's Clothing Aisle, shopping for a new pair of leather pants. The nearest cart was, coincidentally, Mai Valentine's. Bakura took one look in the cart, and saw that Mai had bought a ton of miniskirts.

"PERFECT! Now, let the switching begin! Bakura, hand me a miniskirt," Marik yelled. The British villain sighed, and handed a miniskirt to Marik, who had soon returned with a pair of the Pharoah's leather pants. The process continued, until all of the Pharoah's pants were replaced with miniskirts.

Bakura crossed off the first item, and then read, "Number 2: Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment. Well, that's going to be pretty hard, considering we know most of the characters in this show. I'll find someone to do this on. Marik, I think you should take the Pharoah."

Marik then casually walked up to Yami, leaned against a clothing mannequin, and cried, "HEY! I know you!"

Yami turned to Marik, and bluntly stated, "Wait a moment, aren't you either the villain of Season 2 or that backround character?"

Marik pretended to jump back in suprise. "You mean you DON'T remember me? I was your girlfriend in high school! We used to go out all of the time!"

Yami crossed his arms. "You're clearly delusional. I'm afraid there's only one way to fix that."

Uh oh. Marik knew exactly what came next. "Wait, no -"

_** MIND CRUSH!**_

"...Marik."

Marik woke up to see Bakura standing over him. "You got Mind Crushed, didn't you."

All that the Egyptian could do was nod. Bakura then crossed off the second item, and read, "Number 3: Smash the person in front of you on the head with a ham. Marik, do you have a ham?"

After being helped up, Marik suddenly pulled a ham out of Hammerspace. As he would have said, it's funny because the first three letters spell ham! Bakura then analyzed the ham. "This will do the trick," he approved, "Now, to find the perfect victim."

After scouring the whole store for the perfect victim, Bakura was finally able to spot Tristan. "Now, Marik," he instructed, shoving the ham into Marik, "Go smash Tristan in the head with this ham. I never thought I would actually say that one day."

Due to being Mind Crushed by Yami a few paragraphs back, Marik shuffled over to Tristan, and then started wacking him with a ham. Bakura smirked, and then crossed off the third item. Now, they were going to leave. Marik needed to recover from being Mind Crushed.

_**So, 3 down, 330 to go! Expect Melvin to appear at one point. :D**_


	2. In Which Joey Buys My Little Pony

_** Hello again, and welcome back! First off: thank you for the **__**review, Aqua girl 007! I was actually scared that people would think that it was bad. Secondly, I give permission to Little Kuriboh to do a dramatic reading of both chapters.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi, and Yu-Gi-Oh: the Abridged Series is owned by Little Kuriboh/CardGamesFTW. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. If I owned either, a self insert would have been Bakura's girlfriend by now.**_

Bakura had just finished delivering a recap to Marik on what had happened yesterday in Target. When he had finished, Marik cried, "Sweet mamma jamma! Was I really Mind Crushed?"

"Yes. Yes you were," Bakura responded blankly, "Now, if you don't mind, we should get to Target for today's activities." 

Right when the two entered Target, Bakura whipped out the notepad, and read, "Number 4: Go up to some old geezer & say 'Grandpa! You're ALIVE! It's a MIRACLE! etc.' And there's that old man who runs the game shop over there."

Indeed, Solomon Mutou and his grandson Yugi were grocery shopping. Marik ran up, and started screaming, "GRANDPA! You're alive! Why didn't you help me with my father! For frig's sake, my father would whip everyone in a 50 mile radius when he was angry!" Unfortunately, Marik's ranting attracted Yugi, who walked over.

Yugi looked over Marik for a few seconds, and asked, "Aren't you Malik Blishtar? That minor character who I'm supposed to be friends with?"

Marik, who had been caught unaware, answered, "YES! I am... your friend. And by the way, where is that stylish puzzle that has just mysteriously disappeared?"

Yugi glanced down at himself. Indeed, the puzzle was gone. "Oh! I hid it in my bag," Yugi explained, gesturing to a schoolbag he was wearing, "The spirit who lived inside intentionally Mind Crushed a delusional fellow who claimed to be his girlfriend from high school. Also, he said that the same person swapped his leather pants for miniskirts."

Marik pretended to listen, and then walked back to Bakura, who crossed out Number 4. "That was very close," Bakura acknowledged, "Now, Number 5: Take something from someone else's cart, when they say 'hey, that's mine!' call the security and say that the other ... person was trying to take your _. Now Marik -"

"Wait a moment!" Marik jumped in front of Bakura, and started to wave his hand in the latter's face. "You made _me _do all of that before! It's only fair if you do something!"

"Marik -"

"IT'S ONLY FAIR!" Marik then walked off.

"Well, bugger," Bakura grumbled to himself, "Now, who to steal from..." Suddenly, Bakura's eyes fell on Joey Wheeler's cart. Sneaking over there, Bakura looked into the cart, and he saw a My Little Pony playset. He then grabbed it. Unfortunately, Bakura's eyes locked onto Joey's eyes.

Before Bakura knew it, Joey picked him up by the trenchcoat, and pinned Bakura to the wall. "Hey, what's da big idea? Dat playset's for mah sistah, Serenity!" Bakura then nervously started shouting for security, and then he shoved the My Little Pony playset into Joey's hands. Joey was confused, and stated, "Nyeh?" In the confusion, Bakura was dropped onto the floor.

A few minutes later, Ushio, who had become a security guard in order to train for the day when he became a motorcycle riding police officer, walked over and asked, "What's going on?"

Before Joey could say anything, Bakura yelled, "He took my My Little Pony playset! I don't know why I decided to get it, but I did!" Bakura then grabbed the playset, and ran far away. After making sure that no one was looking, Bakura dropped the playset into Yugi's cart. After crossing off Number 5, Bakura went to find Marik.

Marik was lounging on a beanbag chair. When Bakura walked over, Marik asked, "Did you do it, Fluffy?"

Bakura ignored the embarrasing nickname, and read, "Number 6: Move 'Caution: Wet Floor' signs to carpeted areas. Should be the easiest thing on here."

Marik then jumped up, and the two split up, eventually returning to the beanbag. Each had found one sign, making two Wet Floor signs in total.

"Now, Bakura," Marik schemed, "TO THE DRESSING ROOMS!" A few minutes later, both signs were set up in both dressing rooms. "Well, kitty," Marik yawned, "Let's go back. We need our sleep for another day!"

"Marik! I'm not a bloody kitty!" As Marik joked on the way back to the Marikmobile, Bakura thought he heard Yugi shouting about a My Little Pony playset, several people slipping on the floor, and Joey being thrown into a shelf. Target was going to be turned upside down.

_**No furries, baby pandas, or innocent civilians were harmed in the making of this chapter. And I predict that the reviews will be related to My Little Pony.**_


	3. In Which Bakura Gets Ticked Off

_** And now, ladies and **__**gents, it's time for sailorblaze reads your comments; the part of the show where, as it says, sailorblaze reads your comments!**_

_**Aqua girl 007: THANKS! That's very true. Let's just hope that any Bronies didn't notice Bakura and Joey's little arguement. Speaking of which, according to Bakura, over-laughing can give you cancer, so please watch your health! I don't want you to die and not know what happens in the story!**_

_**Baka Red Rabbit-chan: THANKS! And yes - it's hilarious.**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! You know, that comment about LK warmed my heart (I'm such a fan of the abridged series). It helps that you watch a marathon of YGO:tAS episodes when you're sick in bed. It really helps you get to know the character's personalities. And thanks for letting me know - it's just that I prefer Target.**_

_**hellomaru: THANKS! Ask, and ye shall recieve; this IS the next chapter, after all. :)**_

_**LK has my permission to do a dramatic reading of this. That is, if he comes across this fic, which is highly unlikely, but one can dream! I am also praying this gets a place on TV Tropes, but this will never catch on.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by Little Kuriboh/CardGamesFTW. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. Facebook is owned by Mark Zuckerberg.**_

__Marik and Bakura were on the way back to Target. Right now, the two were conversing about their escapade yesterday.

"Yes Marik," Bakura irritatedly relayed for the 30th time that morning, "For some bloody reason, Joey was buying Serenity, his younger sister, who is too old for it anyway, a My Little Pony playset. Why would anyone do that? It's meant for children!"

Marik sadly glanced at Bakura. "But I like the TV show," he murmered.

"No you don't, Marik. Ah, here's the store."

Then, Marik and Bakura entered Target for the third time. Bakura pulled out the notepad, and read, "Number 7: Hide in the center of the clothes circle where people find shirts, and jump out and yell '!' Marik, there's no bloody way that I'm screaming that."

"But Bakura! It's for a good cause," Marik begged, "We get to embarrass the Pharoah!"

Bakura sighed. "Marik, you're better at sounding like a total moron. Now, get in the clothes circle, and when I give the signal, jump out."

Marik then responded, "Fluffy! I don't know what the signal is!"

"Fine. The signal is me holding up the peace sign."

"Got it!" Marik then got into the center of a clothes circle with shirts. After a while, Duke Devlin walked by, and proceeded to start browsing for shirts. Just before Bakura could give the signal, Marik jumped out, and started yelling "Aihaihaihaihai!"

Duke Devlin shrugged, and commented (with his theme music), "Even in Target, everyone follows the one known as Duke Devlin," before walking away.

Bakura eagerly crossed off Number 7, and then read, "Number 8: Go into the dressing room, wait a few minutes, then yell 'THERES NO TOILET PAPER IN HERE!' Well, Marik, we should get to the dressing room."

Once they reached the Men's Dressing Room area, Marik casually sauntered into one of the stalls. Bakura decided to wait outside, and spent the next few minutes checking his e-mails. Finally, after what seemed like ages, Bakura heard Marik shriek, "THERE'S NO TOILET PAPER IN HERE!" Bakura then heard an employee begrudgingly tell Marik that this was not the bathroom.

Bakura then crossed off Number 8, and when Marik resurfaced, Bakura read, "Number 9: Get a batman costume, put it on, and run around the store screaming at the top of your lungs, 'COME ROBIN! TO THE BATMOBILE!' Marik, since you're going to scream that I should do one, this is what I'll have to do."

A few moments later, Bakura left the dressing room, wearing a Batman costume, and proceeded to start running around the store, claiming to be Batman. Marik followed Bakura taking a video to post on Facebook. At one point, Bakura even grabbed Mokuba's hand, and started running around with him. While all of this was going on, Marik whipped out his phone, logged onto Facebook, and posted the video.

A little while later, Bakura came out of the dressing room, now back in his normal clothing. "Marik, I saw you make that video. Whatever you do, don't post it on bloody Facebook."

"But Fluffy," Marik said, trying not to laugh, "I already posted it on _bloody _Facebook." At that point, Bakura picked up Marik by the legs, swung the latter over his own shoulder, and stomped out to the Marikmobile.

"Now, Marik," Bakura growled, "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't stuff you in the trunk."

"I'm too pretty."

Bakura sighed, and placed Marik down. "Be glad that that's true," Bakura angrily noted, crossing out Number 9. "We're going back inside, Marik. There's more to be done."

_**Short chapter is very, very short. I apologize.**_


	4. In Which Marik Has a Nervous Breakdown

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. **__**The Abridged Series is owned by Little Kuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Facebook is owned by Mark Zuckerberg. The X-Men are owned by Marvel, and G.I. Joe is owned by Hasbro. I give Little Kuriboh my permission to perform a dramatic reading. Now, on to the tale.**_

__"Number 10: Hide between clothing and then jump out and yell 'PICK ME!' Fluffy, we did this already," Marik read from the notepad.

"Actually Marik," Bakura replied, "This is a completely different one. We're both doing this."

The two of them strategically hid themselves from view, in between the clothing hangers, and waited. After a while, Espa Roba walked by Bakura, who grinned, and jumped out, yelling, "Pick me!"

One of Espa Roba's brothers walked up to Bakura, and asked, "Do you want our baby? We don't need it anymore. It can be useful to you. Maybe as a coaster for your drink?"

"I don't want your bloody baby," Bakura snarled, and walked off to find Marik. Just as he approached some girly dresses, Marik jumped out, and yelled, "PICK ME!", not noticing that his partner in crime was standing before him.

Bakura facepalmed. "Marik, it's me," he stated, crossing off Number 10. "Now, Number 11: When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, 'Why won't you people just leave me alone?' Marik, your turn."

After dropping Marik off in the center of the video game isle, Bakura walked around a corner to hide and eavesdrop. Marik then pretended to look at the many different video games, and eventually started to fake-cry in 'confusion'. Soon an employee arrived, and asked, "Hey kid, do you need some help?"

Marik turned around, and slapped the employee. Then, like in the notepad, he screamed, "Why won't you people leave me alone! I've got enough **EFF!**ing issues already, and then you people start shoving your friggin' noses into my **EFF!**ing issues!"

"Jeez, calm down," the random employee said, "It's only my job."

"Well, I don't need you! I don't need any of you! My daddy thinks he can solve all of his problems by using a friggin' whip on everyone! I've got a friggin' split personality because of that for **EFF!**'s sake!"

"Hey, it's ok..."

"IT IS NOT OK! Do you know what the other guy is? He's a friggin' murderous psychopath! And do you want to know the worst thing is? The guy I like hates my **EFF!**ing guts! So there! You don't know what it's like!"

"I do."

"YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE!" Marik then ran out of the isle, and right in front of Bakura, who crossed out Number 11. Marik then saw the employee, who's name was Frank, come out, and then told Bakura, "Did you hear that, fluffy? He doesn't know what my life is like!"

"Come on Marik," Bakura said, playing along with Marik's act, "Let's get away from that big, bad employee." And so they walked to the Toys isle, leaving Frank confused.

"Number 12," Bakura read, " Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men. Well, Marik, let's get set up."

Soon, Marik and Bakura had set up a large battlefield, Bakura playing as the G.I. Joes, and Marik playing as the X-Men. Soon, the battle started.

Marik then held up a Wolverine action figure, and said, "We will not let you destroy our friggin' Charles Xavier School, G.I. Joe!"

Bakura then held up a commander, and responded, "Um... You will fail, because I have the one that you love the most!"

Marik gasped. "What! You don't mean..."

"That's right, Wolverine! I have kidnapped your girlfriend, Barbie!" Bakura then held up a Barbie doll, and cried in a high-pitched voice, "Help me, Wolverine! Those nasty G.I. Joes captured me!" Bakura then held up the commander and returned to his normal voice, declaring, "You must surrender, or we shall kill your beloved Barbie!"

Marik then held up Storm, and switching into the manliest voice you can think of, told the Wolverine figure, said, "Don't listen to him, Wolverine! No matter what happens, he will still murder your **EFF!**ing girlfriend!" Marik then got back into his nasally voice, and held up Wolverine, declaring, "Then I shall fight!"

'The commander' made a growling noise, and the two held up the commander and Wolverine, pretending to fight. After a while, Wolverine defeated the commander, and picked up Barbie with his plastic arms. Bakura then used the high pitched voice to cheer, "My hero!", and then, the Wolverine and Barbie toys started to kiss.

What the two villains didn't notice was that Yami was filming the two of them doing the battle. He snickered, and pulling out his phone, uploaded the video onto Facebook. Then, Yami walked off, leaving Marik and Bakura laughing hysterically, as Bakura crossed off Number 12.

_**Hopefully, this makes up for the short Chapter 3. Stay tuned, as our favorite duo continues to wreak havoc in the store known as Target.**_


	5. In Which Marik Sings Green Day

_**Wolverine x Barbie. The newest pairing. YOU MUST SHIP IT. LK has my permission for a dramatic reading.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh ABRIDGED is owned by Little Kuriboh/CardGamesFTW. G.I. Joe and My Little Pony are owned by Hasbro. X-Men is owned by Marvel. Facebook is owned by Mark Zuckerberg. Poker Face is owned by Lady Gaga. Wake Me Up When September Ends and its lyrics are owned by Green Day. Snicker's is owned by Masterfoods.**_

__"What do you mean, that a video of the battle between G.I. Joe and the X-Men is on bloody Facebook?"

"Someone posted it on there for the whole world to see," Marik yelled. Then, he started shaking Bakura, and screamed, "I'm ruined, Fluffy! Ruined, I say! RUINED!"

Bakura, who was looking as if he was just about to throttle somebody, grumbled, "Calm the hell down. We should head out to Target."

When the two villains arrived, Bakura whipped out the notepad, and read, "Number 13: Hide in a clothes circle. When someone with a shopping cart goes by stick your hand out and steal something from them. I'll do this, because I'm the better thief."

In the Men's Clothing Section, Bakura was hidden in one of the clothing circles, and waited. And waited. And waited some more. Finally, a boy 'Nyeh'-ing the tune to Poker Face walked by, and Bakura reached into his cart...

... And pulled out another My Little Pony playset.

_Oh bugger, not again_, Bakura thought, as he came face to face with an angry Joey Wheeler.

Meanwhile, Marik was lounging on the beanbag chair from before, and he swore that he heard someone getting punched. A few minutes later, Bakura angrily stomped over.

"It was that bloody furry again," the British villain told Marik, crossing off Number 13. "Now, Number 14: Grab a guitar and start singing Wake Me Up When September Ends in a loud shrieking half screaming voice. Needless to say, your voice, Marik."

"HEY! My singing voice is very good, thank you very **EFF!**ing much," Marik indignantely commented, as he grabbed an acoustic guitar and a microphone, and started to sing.

_"Summer has come and passed  
>The innocent can never last<br>wake me up when September ends"_

_"like my father's come to pass  
>seven years has gone so fast<br>wake me up when September ends"_

_"here comes the rain again  
>falling from the stars<br>drenched in my pain again  
>becoming who we are"<em>

Bakura swore that he saw people either crowd around Marik or cover their ears in sheer terror. Noticing the crowd, Marik happily continued the song.

_"as my memory rests  
>but never forgets what I lost<br>wake me up when September ends"_

_"summer has come and passed  
>the innocent can never last<br>wake me up when September ends"_

_"ring out the bells again  
>like we did when spring began<br>wake me up when September ends"_

Here, Bakura noted, was when Marik started to get a bit off key. The people around him gave each other strange looks, and the people who covered their ears were screaming in pain. Nevertheless, the song went on.

_"here comes the rain again  
>falling from the stars<br>drenched in my pain again  
>becoming who we are"<em>

_"as my memory rests  
>but never forgets what I lost<br>wake me up when September ends"_

_"Summer has come and passed  
>The innocent can never last<br>wake me up when September ends"_

Now, the song got decidedly worse. The crowd started to sing with him, while the screaming people rolled around on the ground. Still, the song continued.

_"like my father's come to pass_

_twenty years has gone so fast_

_wake me up when September ends_

_wake me up when September ends _

_wake me up when September ends"_

Marik put down the guitar, as the crowd started clapping, and the people on the ground were sent to the Shadowrealm. Bakura walked up to Marik, and crossed off Number 14. "Number 15," Marik read, "Randomly place 24 bags of candy in peoples carts. Fluffy, are you sure we can't eat the candy?"

"Yes, Marik," Bakura stated, "I'm sure that we can't eat the candy. Now, come help me."

Bakura got 48 bags of Snicker's Candy Bars, and then handed 24 of them to Marik. The two proceeded to throw the bags of Snicker's into the carts of the various shoppers. Bakura smirked as one bag fell into the cart of Joey. _This is payback for punching me earlier,_ Bakura thought.

Eventually, the two of them regrouped, and watched as everyone noticed the Snicker's bags in their carts. Their reactions were, simply, priceless.

"Let's go, Marik. Our work here is done," Bakura proclaimed as he walked out of Target.

_**Ladies and gents, let's give a round of applause to the EFF! sound effect.**_


	6. In Which Yami Mind Crushes Bakura

_**This chapter, it's the return of the dreaded Mind Crush. LK has my permission for a dramatic reading.**_

_**And now, time for more comments!**_

_**Azarath101: THANKS! I'm glad I livened up your shopping experience.**_

_**Aqua girl 007: THANKS! Just don't tell Marik. Actually, the list requires you to sing Wake Me Up When September Ends lol. **_

_**Azarath101: THANKS! Oh, really? Is there any way I can liven up your experience? It's only a matter of time until Bakura is recruited by the 'Bronies'...**_

_**Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by Little Kuriboh/CardGamesFTW. G.I. Joe is owned by Hasbro. X-Men is owned by Marvel.**_

__Bakura looked over the notepad's list, and then told Marik, "So far, we have done 15 ways on the list. This means 15 alternative ways are down, 318 other ways to get kicked out of Target to go."

"Excellent," Marik gleefully replied, "The Pharoah must feel so idiotic now! Nyahahahahaha..."

When they entered Target, Bakura read, "Number 16: Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out. Marik, your cue."

After disguising himself in a Target uniform, Marik found an empty checkout stand, and took his place. Bakura crossed out Number 16, and then read to himself, "Number 17: Go up to an employee and in a official tone say 'code three in house ware' and see what happens. Well, I'd like to see what happens myself." After looking for the right employee to tell this to, Bakura found Frank, the employee that Marik screamed at in a previous chapter.

Bakura then walked up to Frank, who was busy restocking the G.I. Joe and X-Men section after Marik and Bakura used most of the toys to make a battlefield. Bakura cleared his throat, and Frank, the gullible Target Employee, turned to Bakura.

"Excuse me, good sir," Bakura 'informed', "but there's a 'Code 3 in House Wares'."

Frank started to panic, and ran out of the aisle, immediately. Bakura laughed maliciously, and crossed off Number 17.

_**Meanwhile...**_

Marik stood in that checkout stand, with the light now turned on. He checked people out, and eventually noticed Tea, who was staring at him as if he was the most beautiful person in the world (Which he probably was.)

"Wow, Malik," Tea cheerfully yelled, "I had no idea that you had a job!"

"Um..." Marik nervously responded, "I do... have a job... here!"

"Well," Tea boldy stated, "I think you should quit! Now that you have a job, you will have less time to spend with your friends! And if you don't have any time to spend with your friends, you will be a horribly person, blah blah blah, friendship speech..."

Marik then changed the subject. "Your total is 59.95."

_**Meanwhile... (again...)**_

"Now, for Number 18," Bakura noted, "Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the store." And then, Bakura saw someone, and knew immediately that this was the person he will stalk.

Yami pushed his cart down the many isles, buying groceries, leather pants, and trading cards. Suddenly, Yami got the bad feeling that he was being followed. He turned around, and there was Bakura.

"Why, hello, Pharoah," Bakura greeted disgustedly, "Funny running into you here."

Yami wasn't sure if he was supposed to be threatened by the spirit of the Millenium Ring. He shrugged. "I guess there's only one way to keep the loony ones away..."

"Well, truthfully it was Marik who - wait, what are you-"

_**MIND CRUSH!**_

_**Another Meanwhile...**_

"BAKURA! Where the **EFF!** did you go?" Marik was slightly frusterated. It wasn't that Bakura left him at the checkout stand, but no, he had just suddenly disappeared from the store! After discarding the disguise, Marik went to find his partner in crime.

Eventually, Marik tripped over something. "Hey watch it-" he started, until Marik saw Bakura. Who was limp. And unconcious. Due to the fact that Marik was (probably) not as smart as Bakura, he jumped to (for him) the most obvious conclusion.

"Oh no! Bakura's dead!" Marik hysterically picked up and carried Bakura bridal style, and ran out to the Marikmobile, threw Bakura in the front seat, buckled his seat belt, and then Marik did the same for himself, and started to drive back. Once they left the parking lot, Bakura started to stir.

"Marik... my head..." Bakura mumbled.

At the stoplight, Marik got confused. "Bakura," he cried, "You're a... zombie?"

"I'm not a bloody zombie," Bakura grumbled, "I was Mind Crushed by the Pharoah, you idiot."

_**Lame ending is probably lame. And now, for the score of the brief rivalry between Bakura and Joey:**_

_**Bakura - 2**_

_**Joey - 1**_

_**Also, expect more tormenting of Frank the Gullible Target Employee.**_


	7. In Which Bakura Confronts Joey

_** Little Kuriboh has my permission for a dramatic reading. And now, once again, it's time for sailorblaze reads your comments!**_

_**Azarath101: THANKS! That's probably true. The ones in this chapter probably aren't going to be as funny, but I'll try...**_

_**Baka Red Rabbit-chan: THANKS! Yes, but Frank probably won't get any pity from our 'protagonists'. And yes - they'll probably become reoccuring.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by Little Kuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Star Wars is owned by Steven Spielberg and George Lucas. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro.**_

__It had been two days since Bakura had been Mind Crushed by Yami. As the Marikmobile pulled up into the parking lot for Target, it was obvious that there was tension in the air. Marik was still angry at Bakura for leaving him in the checkout stand, but it was obvious that there was more to be done at Target.

"Number 19: Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap. We're both going to do this, in case either of us have another run-in with the Pharoah," Bakura informed Marik as the two walked into Target, and eventually found the gift wrapping. Both took out two long tubes of gift wrap. Bakura immediately shuddered, as he saw that he had pulled out a My Little Pony themed gift wrapping tube. Marik, on the other hand, found gift wrap that was just red.

"Now, Bakura," Marik said, "Let's go find ourselves some worthy opponents!" The two split up, walking towards opposite ends of the store. Bakura eventually ran into Joey, who was making sure that no one would thwart him this time in the attempt to get Serenity the My Little Pony playset. Suddenly, he turned around, and Bakura was standing there.

"Hello, bloody furry," Bakura greeted, trying to sound as intimidating as possible, "I would like to challenge you to a lightsaber battle!" Bakura then pressed a button that immediately cued the Star Wars theme. At first, Joey was scared, until he remembered that he had a shopping cart. Before Bakura knew it, Joey was chasing him through Target.

On the way, Bakura stopped to catch his breath. Then, he witnessed a scene between the Pharoah and Customer Service. Yami was pounding his hand on the desk, screaming, "What do you mean, I can't have a refund? I did not pay 70 dollars for an empty wrapper!"

"I'm sorry, kid," said Ms. Boorin (pronounced Boring), the customer service woman, "If you read our policy, it says -"

_**MIND CRUSH!**_

Then, however, Joey caught up, and Bakura was forced to pick up the My Little Pony gift wrap, and was about to whack Joey on the head with it, when Joey realized that the gift wrap was My Little Pony themed.

"Perfect!" Joey declared, "Dis gift wrap is just what I need!" So, Joey snatched the gift wrap, and walked to the cash register. Bakura sighed, and went to find Marik. He soon found Marik hitting Seto Kaiba on the head with the gift wrap.

Then, Kaiba realized something. "You know what," he yawned, "I'm too rich to deal with this." So he stomped out of Target, towards his Blue Eyes White Dragon Jet.

Bakura, who was cursing under his breath, crossed out Number 19, and read, "Number 20: Set up a concert of singing hamster dolls. Get your friends and turn them on all at the same time. Then act like a conductor. Since we have no friends with us, we'll just have to hook them all up to a machine."

And indeed, they did. Marik soon took his place in front of the singing hamster dolls, pulled out a pen, and yelled, "Ready, Bakura?"

Bakura pressed a button that turned on all of the singing hamster dolls at once. Then, Marik started waving the pen in a back and forth motion. Bakura crossed out Number 20, and sat back to enjoy the concert of the singing hamster dolls.

Once the dolls ended on their own, Bakura read, "Number 21: Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., 'Do you have any Shnerples here?' And there's that new bloke over there."

Indeed, Frank the Gullible Target Employee was approaching, in order to clean up the singing hamster dolls. Just before he could get over there, Marik ran in front of him, and asked, "Excuse me, but do you have any friggin' Shnerples? I just love Shnerples!"

Frank thought, and answered, "Let me see if there are any in stock." Marik then followed Frank, until he reached the grumpy manager, Bill. Frank asked, "Excuse me, Bill, but this kind sir wants to know where the Shnerples are."

Soon, Bill started screaming at Frank, going on about how gullible he was. Marik laughed, too. Then, he went back to Bakura, who crossed off Number 21. Marik then yelled, "Let's do three more! It's a great day!"

Bakura muttered, "Yes, Marik. Whatever you say, Marik." Suddenly, Bakura turned to Number 22, and smirked. This step was very, very familiar indeed.

_**And now, Joey and Bakura are tied, 2 to 2! Tell me who you want to win! And also, the person who guesses what Number 22 is gets a free cookie!**_


	8. In Which Bakura Finds Zexal Cards

_** And now, it's time for another comments special! Since no one guessed, here's a fresh plate of free cookies for whoever wants them. LK has my permission for a dramatic reading.**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Lol. Idiotic Wal-Mart Person is Idiotic.**_

_**YamiYugi98: THANKS! Ryou will be in the house next chapter.**_

_**Baka Red Rabbit-chan: THANKS! No, it's probably not going to be the final battle. YET.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. Barbie is owned by Mattel.**_

__"Number 22: Open a pack of yugioh cards and challenge random people to a 'd-d-d-d-d-d-duel!' Well, Marik, it's time for a children's card game."

"EXCELLENT!" Immediately, Marik and Bakura ran to a section filled with Yu-Gi-Oh ZEXAL cards, and tore open two packs. But, as in Thomas the Tank Engine, there was trouble.

"BAKURA! What the frig are these cards?"  
>Marik looked over his new cards in confusion. "I've never heard of the Stardust Nebula Knight!"<p>

"Marik, did you not read the packaging? These cards are from ZEXAL," Bakura answered, running off to find Joey, who was buying some My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic DVDs, when Bakura ran up to him, yelling, "Furry! It's time to DUEL!"

"NYEH!" Joey jumped back, and ran off. Bakura's eyes widened.

"Ok… not expecting that…" Bakura crossed off Number 22, and went to go find Marik, who was yelling at the Pharaoh, "Get your game on- **EFF!**, that's the wrong series! Pharaoh! IT'S TIME TO DUEL!"

Yami stared at Marik, and then walked off, shaking his head. Bakura then went up to Marik, and read, "Number 23: While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation."

Bakura then hid in a clothes circle, and watched Marik, who just stood in the center of the busy clothing aisle.

"Okay…" Marik started, "So, hello… um… Bob. Is there anything you are doing today?" Marik swapped into another voice, and said, "Well, after I get my groceries, I'm going home." Marik got his normal voice, and cried, "But BOB! Today is a wonderful day!" In the different voice, Marik said, "No. I'm sleepy." Marik looked up, and say Tea staring at him as if Marik had just announced to the world that he was a watermelon.

Tea yelled, "Malik, you've serious issues, man!" and walked off. Bakura got out of the clothing circle, and crossed off Number 23.

"Now, Number 24: Tape a walkie-talkie to the back of a Barbie doll and say to random people, 'I know where you live...' and creepy stuff like that."

After attaching a walkie-talkie to the back of a Barbie: Princess Charm School doll, and hiding, Bakura heard Frank talking to a customer. He then whispered ominously, "I know where you live…"

Immediately, Frank started shrieking his head off, and another voice – one that belonged to Duke Devlin – said (with theme music!), "Even the products stalk the god called Duke Devlin," and walked off.

Bakura happily crossed off Number 24, and then told Marik, "We should get going now."

_**Brace yourselves, kiddies. Melvin and Ryou are teaming up to do numbers 25-27 next chapter!**_


	9. In Which Ryou and Melvin Appear

_** Ladies and gents, it's the moment you've been waiting for. It's the episode where instead of Marik and Florence, you're going to see Melvin and Ryou! I give LK permission to do a dramatic reading. Also, a drinking game: Take a drink every time someone says 'hug'.**_

_**YamiYugi98: THANKS! Well, Melvin wouldn't be ashamed. Ryou would, probably. And your story's great – keep it up!**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! I got the ZEXAL cards idea from a WMG about Yuma having cards that are so new, no one knows how they work. And Duke's line was simply FAAAABULOUS!**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! I'm glad I let you reminisce about your Amazing Ally doll. **_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Barbie is owned by Mattel.**_

__Ryou pushed his cart through Target, buying groceries. However, something was different about Target today. People were hassled over something, and a chubby employee known as Frank was running by, muttering about 'Possessed Barbies' and 'Shnerples'.

Unfortunately, Ryou was so busy being distracted, that he didn't pay attention, and ran into a creepy looking character, who then asked him, "Could I get a HUG?"

"Well, I don't see why not-" Suddenly, a knife-like object dug itself into Ryou's arm. "Ow! Why did you bloody stab me?"

"Well, you said you wanted a HUG!"

Suddenly, a note fell onto Ryou's hand. He picked it up, and read the note.

_To my host,_

_ Enclosed in this notebook is a bloody list. This list is the 333 Ways To Get Kicked Out Of Target. You have to do them with Marik – or Melvin, whichever one is out wreaking bloody havoc._

_ Your worst nightmare,_

_ The voice._

Ryou opened the notebook, and flipped until he got to the first uncrossed step. Then, he read, "Number 25: Attempt to drown in a kiddy pool. What kind of person wrote this?"

Soon, Melvin and Ryou walked over to a kiddy pool. Melvin then demanded, "You go in."

"But I don't-"

"HUG?"

Ryou sighed, and got into the pool. He then started to pretend to yell, and 'splash around', until Frank came over. Frank said, "Gee, kiddo, are you okay?"

Melvin then turned to Frank, and asked, "Hello, weird employee person. Would you like a HUG?"

"Actually, I'm busy."

Ryou then crawled out of the kiddy pool, crossed off Number 25, and read, "Number 26: Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it. Relaxing…"

Before Ryou could say anything else, Melvin yelled, "I'm doing it!"

Before he knew it, Ryou was forced to drag a large lawn chair (with Melvin sitting in it) all the way to the magazines section. Then, Melvin got up, and walked over to the food court, where he asked, "Excuse me, but I would like a soda. And can I have a little umbrella?"

Bob and Josh, the food court people, took one look at Melvin, and laughed. Then, Bob said, "We like, don't have those umbrellas, dude!"

Then, Melvin asked, "Would you like a HUG then?"

"Ok," Bob started, but then yelled, "Augh! That's not what you're supposed to do when giving a HUG! Stop it, man! Stop – " And then Josh screamed, as he witnessed the death of his co-worker by HUG.

"Ok, dude," Josh nervously cried, "You can have an umbrella!" After getting the umbrella, Melvin returned to Ryou, who immediately backed off. Melvin then sat in the chair, and relaxed. Being a murderous psychopath was great.

After a long 10 minutes, Ryou crossed off Number 26, and read, "Number 27: Open up random packages in the toy aisle then walk off. If an employee asks what you're doing, just say 'I changed my mind.'"

"You realize that I'm the only one with enough **EFF!**ing guts to pull these off?"

Soon, Melvin was in the Toys aisle, opening up every toy there. After a while, he 'gave up' in frustration, and walked off, only to be stopped by Frank.

"Excuse me," Frank lectured, trying to look tough, "But what in the world are you doing?"

Melvin, who happened to be taller than Frank, looked down, and bluntly answered, "I changed my mind."

Immediately, Frank broke down, and ran away crying. Ryou took the opportunity to pay for his groceries, and put them in the trunk.

_I would have had fun today, _Ryou thought, _if it hadn't been for that bloody psycho._ Just before Ryou could get into the Marikmobile, however, Melvin immediately stopped him.

"There was only one problem with the list," Melvin informed, "There weren't any deadly things to do! Not even any HUGS! I'll have remedy that now…"

Ryou found himself being dragged back into Target.

_**A little while later…**_

Ryou hid under a couch, and caught his breath. For the past few minutes, Melvin had stabbed him with the Millennium Rod, and giving him what Melvin had considered to be a HUG. Just as Ryou crawled out, he bumped into Melvin, who begged, "Don't you want a HUG?"

Fortunately, before Melvin could resume, Yami stomped over to Ryou and Melvin. Ryou yelled, "Yugi! It's bloody good to see you! I need you to get rid of this bloody psychopath! He's bloody stabbing me!"

Yami, however, had other plans. He yelled, "I have had enough of you two ruining a perfectly good experience at Target. Is there any day that you are not swarming me or annoying Joey? There's only one way to remedy this situation…"

_**MIND CRUSH!**_

Bakura blinked, and found himself in front of the Pharaoh. Turning around, he saw Marik, who was obviously very traumatized, frantically grab his hand, panting.

"I guess that my host did come here today," Bakura acknowledged. Marik didn't seem to notice.

"Fluffy! My friggin other personality was out! My reputation is ruined! Ruined, I say! RUINED!" 

Bakura tuned out of Marik's rant to check on himself. He had suffered various stab wounds, but when Bakura raised his hands up to his head, he found the ultimate shock. "Marik," Bakura said, "How did someone cut off a section of my hair?"

Marik immediately noticed, and started to slowly back off. Yami sighed, and walked out of the store, pretending not to notice Bakura attempting to throttle Marik.

_**I apologize for this chapter not being as funny as the others. But hey, at least you got to see Ryou and Melvin. Right?**_


	10. In Which Marik Scars Everyone For Life

_** First off: WE'VE HIT CHAPTER 10! W TO THE O-O-T! Secondly, LK has my permission to do a dramatic reading. Thirdly, does anyone here have a TV Tropes account? I would love it if this got a page, but I would still be happy if we can't get it a page.**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Oh, is he? Don't worry, your secret is safe with me. And Florence (Not Bakura, I mean your Yami), it's perfectly fine if you love the Pharaoh.**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Hooray for the Limey Man! Don't worry, thought – Ryou will be fine. By the way, what happened in the War of the Fangirls?**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Yes. Yes he was.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Surfin' USA is owned by Brian Wilson and the Beach Boys. Speedos are owned by Speedo Inc.**_

__"Marik, knock it off." It had been a day since Bakura's injuries finally healed. A month ago, his hikari, Ryou, had been nearly killed by Melvin, Marik's yami. Now, Bakura was driving the Marikmobile back to Target. On the way, for no apparent reason, Marik started stroking Bakura's hair, as if the latter was a soft kitty (which Bakura probably was).

Marik made puppy dog eyes at Bakura. "But Bakura! Your hair IS really fluffy! You have to admit it! Also, you make this adorable purring noise whenever I pet you!"

Bakura started growling. "Marik, if you value your life and sanity, stop. Stroking. Me."

"IGNORE ME!"

Bakura sighed, and pulled into the parking lot for Target. Then, he read, "Number 28: Run around Wal-Mart in a bathing suit singing the Surfin' USA theme song. I am not going to do that."

Soon, Marik burst out of the dressing room in a Purple Speedo. Bakura immediately cringed, as Marik started to run around the store and sing.

"_If everybody had an ocean_

_Across the U. S. A._

_Then everybody'd be surfin'_

_Like Californi-a_

_You'd seem 'em wearing their baggies_

_Huarachi sandals too_

_A bushy bushy blonde hairdo_

_Surfin' U. S. A."_

"_You'd catch 'em surfin' at Del Mar_

_Ventura County line_

_Santa Cruz and Trestle_

_Australia's Narrabeen_

_All over Manhattan_

_And down Doheny Way"_

"_Everybody's gone surfin'_

_Surfin' U.S.A."_

As Marik continued to sing, several others reacted their own ways. Serenity fainted, fangirls took pictures, Frank screamed in complete terror, and Kaiba quickly escorted Mokuba out of Target.

"_We'll all be planning that route_

_We're gonna take real soon_

_We're waxing down our surfboards_

_We can't wait for June_

_We'll all be gone for the summer_

_We're on surfari to stay_

_Tell the teacher we're surfin'_

_Surfin' U. S. A."_

"_Haggerties and Swamies_

_Pacific Palisades_

_San Onofre and Sunset_

_Redondo Beach L. A._

_All over La Jolla_

_At Wa'imea Bay."_

"_Everybody's gone surfin'_

_Surfin' U.S. A."_

"_Everybody's gone surfin'_

_Surfin' U.S. A."_

"_Everybody's gone surfin'_

_Surfin' U.S. A."_

With the last line, Marik ran back into the dressing room, and quickly changed back into normal clothes. Bakura breathed a sigh of relief, crossed out Number 28, and read "Number 29: Say things like, 'Would you be as kind so to direct me to your Twinkies?' I guess that I'll do that, so you won't scar everybody for life again."

Bakura then went up to Frank, tapped him on the shoulder, and asked, "Will you please direct me to your bloody Twinkies?" Frank ran away, sobbing. Bakura crossed off Number 29, and read, "Number 30: If an employee comes within 30 ft scream "GET AWAY FROM ME!" Then run out of the store screaming."

Marik then ran into the middle of the store, and started sobbing hysterically. Frank returned, but just as he was about to give Marik a hug, the latter slapped Frank. Then, Marik screamed, "Get the **EFF! **away from me!" Marik started sobbing again, and ran out of the store, with Bakura following behind.

On the way back home, Marik started to stroke Bakura's hair again, obviously forgetting the warning earlier. After a while of hearing the 'adorable purring noises', at a red light, Bakura grabbed Marik's hand, and bit it.

Marik frantically grabbed his hand. "OW! What the frig was that for?"

Bakura started the car again. "I warned you."

_**Again, a short and weird chapter. Hopefully, no one was scarred for life by Marik. And as for Bakura's purring noises, I'm leaving it up to your imagination. My theory is because he's a kitty.**_


	11. In Which Bakura Attacks Joey

_**LK has my permission for a dramatic reading.**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! So do I. (lolls)**_

_**Cybran09: THANKS! I'm going, I'm going!**_

_**RyouBakura98: THANKS! I see. Wow, that must be intense. :O It's fine, Florence.**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Oh no! Did Marik scar you for life? :( Yes – who can resist Fluffy Kitty and his complete fluffiness? (I also think that he mews excitedly if you scratch him behind the ears…) And to quote Tristan and Joey… TOOOOOOORRRRRRMEEEEEENNNNNT!**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro.**_

__Bakura smacked Marik's hand away from his hair as the Marikmobile pulled up into Target. The Egyptian had already injured one hand in the previous chapter, and it would have been tragic if the other hand had been bitten on by Bakura.

"Number 31: Walk up to an employee and ask questions like 'How come this store is called Target?' Or, 'What's up with your hair?' 'Why do you people wear nametags?' 'Can't you all remember your own names?'"

Luckily, Frank had just happened to be walking by, when Marik walked up, and asked, "Why is this store called Target?"

"Um… I don't know… the logo is a target, perhaps?"

"Why do you wear nametags?"

"I don't know…"

"CAN'T YOU REMEMBER YOUR OWN **EFF!**ING NAMES?"

At this point, Frank burst into tears, and ran far, far away. Bakura walked up to Marik, crossed off Number 31, and read, "Number 32: Test the fishing rods and see what you can 'catch' from the other aisles."

Marik cheered, "Excellent! I love a good fishing trip!"

Soon, they had two fishing rods, and were positioned behind the bargain shelves at the front of the store. After throwing it a few times, Marik had caught several pairs of leather pants, LEATHER SHOES!, and some trading cards, while Bakura caught several My Little Pony playsets.

_Not the bloody ponies, _Bakura thought, as he crossed off number 32. "Now, Number 33: Glare menacingly at anyone who comes within 40 ft of you. Then, hiss like a snake, and act like you're going to bite them."

Soon, Bakura settled over in the middle of the store. Finally, he saw Joey approaching, and glared menacingly. When Joey refused to turn back, something inside of Bakura snapped. Everyone's favorite bishounen kitty sprinted towards Joey, and pounced onto him.

"Yug'," Joey yelled, "Hey, Yug' I need some help! Dat Bakura guy is tryin' ta kill me!" Bakura hissed, and started biting at Joey. Unfortunately, he didn't see Yami run over.

"Ok, seriously," Yami exasperatingly cried, "First, a fishing rod took away the items in my shopping cart. Then, another took away the items in _Joey's _shopping cart. And now, this? I am not having a good day," Yami sighed, as he raised his arm, and –

_**MIND CRUSH!**_

When Bakura regained consciousness, he was laying on a couch in Marik's living room. Then, Ishizu Ishtar, Marik's older sister, came in, and told Bakura, "I predict that my brother will come in 5 minutes…", before walking away again.

5 minutes later, Marik indeed, ran in, and gleefully yelled, "Hello, Fluffy! I got you here when you got Mind Crushed! At first, I was going to put you on my bed, but then you started scratching at my pillow in your sleeping-unconscious-whatever state, so I moved you onto the couch –"

"Marik, you're going too fast."

"Quiet, Fluffy! And while you were on the couch, I discovered that you make an adorable mewing sound whenever I started scratching you behind the ears!"

In response, Bakura turned over, groaned, and buried his head into the couch cushion.

_**Short chapter is short. But Joey, Ponies, and Mind Crushing returned. RIGHT? Speaking of Joey, he and Bakura are, yet again, tied, 3 to 3.**_


	12. In Which Phineas and Ferb Is Referenced

_**Read it and weep, fangirls: Bakura seems to, indeed, be… a kitteh. LK has my permission for a dramatic reading. Also, I don't own this list. IMPORTANT! THERE IS NOW A POLL CONCERNING THIS STORY. PLEASE VOTE TO DETERMINE A SONG THAT WILL APPEAR LATER.**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! It was only a matter of time until Ishizu arrived.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl-sademo588: THANKS! YES! Someone finally agrees!**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Poor Bakura indeed. I think that there are Bronies stalking him and Marik now. And also, Marik now has evidence of Bakura's kittiness. **_

_**Demonhedgehog: THANKS! Who doesn't like Kitty!Bakura?**_

_**Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Perry the Platypus is owned by Dan Povenmire and Jeff "Swampy" Marsh. King Julien is owned by DreamWorks. I Like To Move It Move It is owned by Reel 2 Reel. Speedos are owned by Speedo. Surfin' USA is owned by the Beach Boys.**_

"Number 34: Throw a fake rubber snake into some lady's face and watch her freak out. Marik, wipe that bloody smirk off of your face," Bakura irritatedly recited as the duo stepped into Target for the 12th time.

After finding a REALISTICALLY REAL RUBBER SNAKE! NOW FOR $25.95! IT'S EXTREEEEEME! (Bakura asked, "Who licensed this? Yuma?") Marik ran out, and chucked the rubber snake into Mai Valentine's face.

"Oh no! Not my beautiful face," Mai Valentine shrieked (Apologies to Mai Valentine fans anywhere!).

Bakura crossed off Number 34, and read, "Number 35: Squeeze their legs and either sing, 'I like to move it, move it!' Or say 'You got chicken legs!'"

Marik snuck up behind Frank, squeezed his legs, and started singing the King Julien version of 'I Like To Move It (Move It)'. Because the mental image of Marik singing that song was more mentally scarring than Marik running in a Speedo singing Surfin' USA, the lyrics were not posted in this fanfic. As the clincher, Marik yelled, "YOU HAVE CHICKEN LEGS! FRIGGIN' CHICKEN LEGS!", making Frank run for his grandma.

Bakura crossed off Number 35, and read, "Number 36: Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from 'Mission: Impossible.'" Bakura soon started hiding behind large objects. After checking to see if the 'coast was clear', he ran out, and hid again.

After a while, Bakura heard Marik running up to him, singing, "Doobedoobedooba, Doobedoobedooba, Doobedoobedooba, Doobedoobedooba… FLUFFY!"

_"He's a semi-felenic tail sportin' mammal of action,_

_He's a furry little kitty who will never flinch from a fray-yay-yay,_

_He's got more than just mad skills,_

_He's got fluffy hair and a bill,_

_And the women swoon whenever they hear him say..."_

At that point, Tea, Serenity, and Miho flocked around Bakura, who was confused as ever. Just before he could ask Marik what the bloody hell was going on, Marik started stroking Bakura again, causing the latter to get into Kitty Mode and purr. Again. In response, the girls screamed like 10-year-old fangirls, and passed out. Marik then continued the song.

_"He's Bakura!_

_Bakura the Limey Kitty!_

_BAKURA!"_

Marik then triumphantly yelled, "AGENT LK!" as Bakura rolled his eyes, and crossed off Number 36, and then stormed angrily out of Target. Marik noticed, and frantically chased Bakura, crying "Wait! Fluffy, come back!"

_**Yeah. Also, someone all too familiar will return next chapter.**_


	13. In Which There Are Two Melvins

_** Welcome back, everyone! I have a problem - I think I'm becoming... a Brony. First, I don't own this list. Secondly, I give LittleKuriboh/whoever wants to my permission to do a dramatic reading. Also, Frank may have something really bad happen to him...**_

_**lonewolfgirl-sademo558: THANKS! I'm imagining the Woody Woodpecker laugh dubbed over this.**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Marik is always funny. And if you loved Bakura's theme, you'll love Agent P's theme! It's the same, except it's with a Platypus, which makes it more EXTREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEME!**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! Yep, Melvin's coming back (And Ryou may come back, I need to figure out when...) Again: Who can resist Fluffy Kitty and his fluffiness?**_

_**Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Pitbull owns himself. Twilight is owned by Smeyer. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro.**_

Marik nearly ran away when Bakura approached him that morning, carrying a pitbull. No, not the rapper Pitbull. The dog breed pitbull, complete with a spike collar.

Marik yelped, "Bakura, get that friggin' mutt away from me!"

Bakura smirked. "Oh, you mean Melvin? I got him for my host. Unfortunately, he considers Ryou a chew toy," Bakura informed, pulling up the sleeve of his trenchcoat to show Marik the teethmarks. "We should get to Target."

In Target, Bakura put Melvin the pitbull on a leash, took out the notepad, and read, "Number 37: While no one's watching, quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room. And I thought Twilight was cliche."

Marik soon hid himself from view. After making sure that no one was watching, he grabbed the signs, and swapped them. Marik ran back over to Bakura to watch people freak out. Bakura smirked, crossed off Number 37, and read: "Number 38: Bring your pet pit-bull into Wal-mart. Act casual. If someone is brave enough to walk up to you and tell you to get out, simply reply 'He's going to help me pick out his favorite dog food'."

Bakura then started to walk around with Melvin the Dog on a leash, noticing multiple customers fleeing from the dog. After a while, Joey walked up to Bakura, and yelled, "Hey kitty, get dat dog out of here!"

Bakura frowned, "First off, I'm not a bloody kitty. And secondly, he just wants his favorite dog food."

"Oh really? And what would dat be?"

"Bronies. Especially ones from Brooklyn."

Suddenly, Melvin the Dog chased Joey out of the store. Marik walked over to Bakura, and asked, "I'm just confused. Why did you name your friggin' dog after your enemy?"

"He's Ryou enemy, too." And with that, Bakura followed Melvin the Dog outside of Target.

_Later that night, at 12:00 a.m._

The ninja pounded on Bakura's door angrily. Soon, Bakura stomped over to the door, and opened it, still in his pajamas. Everyone's favorite bishounen kitty knew immediately who it was - or at least, he thought he did.

"Marik, what did you come here for? It's bloody midnight!" Ninja!Marik then thrust the notepad into Bakura, who said, "Oh, I must have dropped it in Target." Marik stomped his foot, and opened the notebook to Number 39. Bakura read, "Number 39: TP as much of the store as possible... Oh, you want to do this at Target? At least let me get dressed."

At Target, Ninja!Marik and Bakura got as many rolls of toilet paper as possible, and a little while later, the store was covered. "Well, Marik," Bakura noted, "I should get home now."

Before Bakura could leave, though, Ninja!Marik removed a Ninja!Mask, and revealed that it was actually Melvin. No, not Melvin the Dog. The other Melvin. You know, the one who appeared in Chapter 9. Well, anyway, Melvin dropped onto the ground, and started to laugh hysterically.

Bakura stormed over. "Seriously, Melvin? This has to be important."

Melvin stood up. "Why, hello Florence-"

"I told you not to call me that!"

"Oh come on, Florence. I brought you here, because it's time-"

Bakura tapped his foot impatiently. "And, pray tell, what is it time for?"

"SILENCE! Anyway. Florence, it's time... for your HUG."

Bakura stared at Melvin in surprise. Then, he yelled, "Really, Melvin? You woke me up at 12:00 Midnight, you made me tp most of this store... for a bloody hug?"

Suddenly, Frank ran over, and yelled, "Who goes there?"

Melvin turned to Frank. "Why if it isn't that strange employee person," Melvin noted, "Would you like a HUG?"

Frank smiled, "Sure-" And then, the screen turned to Bakura to censor Frank's death. Bakura tilted his head as Frank screamed, "OHMIGOD! That's not a hug! Stop it! You're hurting me-" And then, Frank was dead. Bakura didn't notice that the Pharaoh was standing next to him.

Yami asked, "Can I Mind Crush him?"

"I don't care."

Yami then raised his hand, and boomed...

_**MIND CRUSH!**_

Marik then starting freaking out over Frank's corpse, and yelled, "BAKURA! Why am I in Target? It's too early? And why is that employee dead?"

Bakura shrugged. "Poor bugger. Shall we bury him in the Miley Cyrus section?"

Everyone nodded, and buried Frank in some floor tiles under some Miley Cyrus CDs. Just as everyone turned to leave, though, no one saw a zombie's hand shoot up from the ground.

_**Ladies and gents, you have been a first hand witness as to how evil Melvin is: he killed Frank, who is now a zombie.**_


	14. In Which Marik Sings More Songs

_**I'm back, everyone! I just was resting my tired little eyes. I don't own this list. LK and anyone who wants to have my permission for a dramatic reading. So, why not answer those comments? And remember: Vote on the poll if you want to help choose a song!**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! I will. Woahwoahwoah. Miley Cyrus has a CLOTHES LINE? (Facepalm of epic failure) Disney disgusts me these days, with their trashy pop.**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Thanks for coming back! I can't give away the real one, so take female!Bakura in a Catwoman costume. No one else wanted it, but HECK! She's yours.**_

_**Demonhedgehog: THANKS! Technically, it's Ninja!Melvin. OMG. I must see that picture. You have a deviantART account?**_

_**Yu-Gi-OH is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Take It Off is owned by Ke$ha. You Make Me Feel is owned by Cobra Starship and Sabi. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. Nerf is owned by Nerf. Stronger and its parody are owned by Kanye West and ShadyVox, respectively.**_

Bakura was genuinely surprised when he and Marik went into Target the next day to find that Frank was seemingly still alive. Marik went up to Frank, and pointed out, "I thought you were dead!"

Frank turned to Marik, who screamed in terror. Frank moaned, "Braaaaaaaains." The gullible Target Employee was now a Gullible _Zombie _Target Employee.

Marik screamed, and then jumped onto Bakura. "HELP ME, FLUFFY," Marik shrieked, "FRANK'S A FRIGGIN' ZOMBIE!"

Bakura, yet again, ignored Marik, and read, "Number 40: Whenever you hear a voice saying, 'Clean up, etc' fall to the ground sobbing screaming 'The voices!' Then, get back up & act normal."

After a while, Bill the Manager came onto the intercom to announce, "Clean up on Aisle 3." At that point, Marik collapsed, and wriggled around, yelling, "THE VOICES! THE FRIGGIN' VOICES! GET THEM OUT OF MY **EFF!**ING HEAD!" Marik then stood up, and continued on his merry way.

Bakura crossed off Number 40, and read, "Number 41: Dress up in a trench coat & wear sunglasses. Walk up to someone browsing and say 'The rooster is in the nest' Wait for a reply. After they finish talking, hand them a cap gun and whisper 'Use this wisely.'"

Soon, Bakura had put on a pair of (My Little Pony) sunglasses, and eventually ended up near Yugi, who was stocking up on trading cards. Bakura then said in a tone that only he and Yugi could here, "The rooster is in the nest."

Yugi turned to Bakura, and replied, "Um, Bakura? Are you sure that you're okay?"

Bakura then pulled out a Nerf gun, shoved it into Yugi, and whispered, "Use this wisely." Then, he walked away.

As Bakura went back to Marik, he heard Yugi shout behind him, "If I were you, I would get psychiatric help!" Bakura crossed off Number 41, and read, "Number 42: Go to the music aisle, and start singing horrible karaoke. Marik, you sing horrible karaoke."

"I do not!" Marik and Bakura went to the music aisle, and Marik put in a CD. Bakura saw the cover, and groaned.

"Oh no. Please, do anything you want: Call me Fluffy, stroke me, but do not start singing –" Then, Marik started singing:

_There's a place down town _

_Where the freaks all come around. _

_It's a hole in the wall._

_It's a dirty free for all. _

_When the dark _

_Of the night comes around. _

_That's the time, _

_That the animal comes alive. _

_Looking for _

_Something wild. _

_And now we lookin' like pimps _

_In my gold Trans-Am. _

_Got a water bottle full of whiskey _

_In my handbag. _

_Got my drunk text on _

_I'll regret it in the mornin' _

_But tonight I don't give a _

_I don't give a _

_I don't give a_

Suddenly, a crowd came around, and Marik continued the song:

_There's a place downtown, _

_Where the freaks all come around. _

_It's a hole in the wall. _

_It's a dirty free for all. _

_And they turn me on. _

_When they take It Off. _

_When they take It Off. _

_Everybody Take It Off. _

_There's a place I know _

_If you're looking for a show. _

_Where they go hardcore _

_And there's glitter on the floor. _

_And they turn me on. _

_When they take It Off. _

_When they take It Off. _

_Everybody Take It Off. _

Suddenly, a microphone was shoved into Bakura's hand, as Marik invited everyone's favorite bishounen kitty onto the stage. Marik continued the song:

_Lose your mind. _

_Lose it now. _

_Lose your clothes _

_In the crowd. _

_We're delirious. _

_Tear it down _

_'Til the sun comes back around. _

_N-now we're getting so smashed. _

_Knocking over trashcans. _

_Everybody breakin' bottles _

_It's a filthy hot mess. _

_Gonna get faded _

_I'm not the designated _

_Driver so _

_I don't give a _

(Bakura): _I don't give a _

_I don't give a_

_There's a place downtown, _

_Where the freaks all come around. _

_It's a hole in the wall. _

_It's a dirty free for all. _

(Bakura): _And they turn me on. _

(Bakura):_ When they take It Off. _

(Bakura):_ When they take It Off. _

(Marik and Bakura): _Everybody Take It Off. _

_There's a place I know _

_If you're looking for a show. _

_Where they go hardcore _

_And there's glitter on the floor. _

(Bakura): _And they turn me on. _

(Bakura): _When they take It Off. _

(Bakura): _When they take It Off. _

(Marik and Bakura): _Everybody Take It Off._

Suddenly, the music changed to a different song. Bakura tensed up, as Marik sung:

_Everything you want so let me get up there _

_I'm the baddest boy in the atmosphere _

_Tell me what you want so we can do just what you like_

_You make me feel that _

(Bakura): _La la la la la _

_You make me feel so _

(Bakura): _La la la la la _

_You make me feel that_

(Bakura): _La la la la la _

_You make me feel so _

(Bakura): _La la la la la _

_You, you make me feel that_

"Marik, what the bloody hell is wrong with you?"

"Quiet, Fluffy! The song is changing back now!"

(Bakura): _Oh, oh, oh! _

_EVERYBODY TAKE IT OFF! _

(Bakura): _Oh, Oh, Oh! _

_EVERYBODY TAKE IT OFF! _

(Bakura): _Right now! _(Marik):_ TAKE IT OFF! _

(Bakura): _Right now!_ (Marik):_ TAKE IT OFF! _

(Bakura): _Right now!_ (Marik):_ TAKE IT OFF! _

_Oooh. _

(Bakura): _Right now!_ (Marik):_ TAKE IT OFF! _

(Bakura): _Right now!_ (Marik):_ TAKE IT OFF! _

(Both): _EVERYBODY TAKE IT OFF! _

Soon, all of the customers arrived, and started dancing, as Marik finished:

(Both):

_There's a place downtown, _

_Where the freaks all come around. _

_It's a hole in the wall. _

_It's a dirty free for all. _

_And they turn me on. _

_When they Take It Off. _

_When they Take It Off. _

_Everybody Take It Off. _

_There's a place I know _

_If you're looking for a show. _

_Where they go hardcore _

_And there's glitter on the floor. _

_And they turn me on. _

_When they Take It Off. _

_When they Take It Off. _

_Everybody Take It Off _

As the girls fainted, the audience cheered, and employees complained, Marik's face slowly started to turn into a sad expression as he witness Bakura turn heel, and leave the store. Marik chased after him. Suddenly, a cue started to play, and Jaden took center stage.

_YEAH,_

_ALRIGHT,_

_LET'S CRACK THIS UP!_

_IF-IF-IF YOU TRY TO DUEL ME, _

_IT'S GONNA MAKE IT HARDER; _

_I NEED YOU TO PLAY YOUR CARDS NOW, _

'_CAUSE I CAN'T WAIT MUCH LONGER! _

_MY DECK'S, LIKE, TOTALLY GONNA BEAT YA;_

_YOU MAY THINK YOU'RE STRONGER, _

_BUT JUST WAIT,_

_I WANNA MAKE MY NEXT MOVE:___

_**WINWIN, KURIBOH'S COMIN' AT YOU!**_

_** LK and ShadyVox: Please make a full version of the Stronger Parody song from the 10**__**th**__** Anniversary Abridged Movie.**_

_** -sailorblaze**_


	15. In Which Yusei and Jack Make A Cameo

_**First off, I don't own this list. Secondly, you all (especially LK) have my permission for a dramatic reading. Thirdly, don't forget to visit the poll to vote. Now, it's time for a Super Special Awesome Comments Special!**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Who would know? (BTW, the second song is 'You Make Me Feel' by Cobra Starship and Sabi.) Also, the MLP stuff is for an event somewhere close to chapter 50. Let's see – 333 ways, 45 will be done, that makes 288 to go.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl-sademo588: THANKS! Oh, I know the one. Marik is soooo going to do it! **_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! Oh, Bakura. You never get any slack.**_

_**Demonhedgehog: THANKS! Yes, Frank is super amazing. We'll find out this chapter. OK, let me know when you post the picture!**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! He'd deny it. And yes, yes, Jaden was amazing. That's good info; I can't wait for the full song to come out!**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. IT'S MY LIFE! is owned by MarissaTheWriter. Portal is owned by Valve. Legos are owned by Lego.**_

Bakura made Marik drive the car so that he wouldn't have to endure being stroked like a cat again. At least, he thought he wouldn't. But boy oh boy, Bakura was wrong. When Marik found out he was driving, he started to whine.

"But Bakura," Marik whined, "I like it when you drive!"

Bakura crossed his arms. "No, Marik. I cannot afford for you to pet me like a cat again."

In a last ditch effort, Marik pulled out the Millennium Rod, and waved it in front of Bakura's face. "I COMMAND YOU TO DRIVE THE **EFF!**ING CAR!"

Bakura was unfazed. "Marik, my name is not Steve."

In the end, Bakura was forced to drive the car again, as it turned out that Marik had used a license from one of his Steves. It was another uneventful car ride, except for when Marik started to pet him.

Eventually, they got to Target. Bakura took out the list, and read, "Number 43: Walk along look at someone giggle at them & say to no one 'I know, I know… hehehe.' Keep doing it until they give you a weird look and walk off"

Marik walked into the center of the store, and started laughing to himself about Bakura's reaction to _IT'S MY LIFE!_, the notorious Portal fanfic. "I know, I know," Marik muttered, as everyone stared at him. Then, Marik walked off.

"Number 44: Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day. Marik, I'll need your help." Soon, Marik and Bakura had finished setting all of the alarm clocks to 10-minute intervals. 10 minutes later, everyone screamed, and fell to the floor.

Bakura crossed off Numbers 43 and 44, and read, "Number 45: Go in to the camping department and enter a tent. Then, tell random customers that they can come in if they bring a pillow from the bedding department."

Marik had soon set up a tent, and Bakura came in, with a pillow from the bedding department. Before you knew it, Joey came over.

"Oh. It's you," Joey bitterly remarked.

Marik cheerfully yelled, "Hello! If you want to settle this, bring a pillow from the bedding department!"

Joey didn't care about pillows, and went into the tent to settle the score. Eventually, he came out to get Yami, who went into the tent, and yelled…

_**DOUBLE MIND CRUSH!**_

_**Meanwhile…**_

A tall blonde man was waiting outside of Target for his friend. Suddenly, a motorcycle pulled up, and out stepped Yusei Fudo, who said to his friend, "Jack."

The person named Jack yelled, "WHAT IS IT YUSEI?"

"I have another message," Yusei stated.

"WHAT IS THE MESSAGE, YUSEI?"

"Card Games… In Target!" 

Jack was shocked. "CARD GAMES IN TARGET! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?"

Yusei shrugged. "I know," he replied, "They just keep getting more ridiculous? What's next, Card Games With Legos?"

Suddenly, Jack and Yusei saw an ambulance speed over, and a couple of paramedics ran into Target. Then, they carried two people over on stretchers.

Marik and Bakura would have to wait until their injuries healed before they could get back to Target.

_**Who else saw a hospital trip coming? BTW, 'Kura and Joey are tied again!**_


	16. In Which Marik and Bakura MST Something

_** First off, I don't own this list. Secondly, to LK: if you are reading this, you are not just awesome. You are SUPER SPECIAL AWESOME! Also, you and everyone else have my permission for a dramatic reading of this. Also, Rinbo, IndecisivePancake, and everyone else have my permission for fanart/illustrations.**_

_** And now for another SUPER SPECIAL AWESOME comments special!**_

_**MelodyxRage: THANKS! Also, there's a funny Easter Egg for Agent **__**LK**__**. It's in his codename. And we're over 9,000? That's impossible!**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! As for Ghost Nappa, he's coming, but not yet. Once we get to a certain step, he'll appear.**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! Poor Bakura. Does he ever get any slack? He and Marik are very, very unfortunate. Send them Get Well cards!**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! I'm sure everyone did. ON MOTORCYCLES!**_

_**Lonewolfgirl-sademo588: THANKS! Just be sure to say what you lol'd about.**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! And don't forget Melvin, Ryou, and Ms. Boorin from a few chapters ago… and the Clown, Panik, Kaiba, and many, many others. What they'll need is a **__**MIGRAINE CRUSH!**_

_**FMAfanfreak: THANKS! Of course – how could I forget him? He's coming with a song from Phineas and Ferb.**_

_**Loppytaffy: THANKS! I don't watch D., lol. From what I read on Wikipedia, Dark Mousy seems a lot like a more heroic Bakura. And thanks for the laughing! Don't worry, my search for LK reading this is on the move! I also updated the above thingy to include Rinbo and IndecisivePancake.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. The Mystery Science Theater 3000 Theme is owned by Joel Hodgson and Best Brains, Inc. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. Mario Bros. is owned by Nintendo.**_

__Bakura woke up to bright fluorescent lights, a beeping noise, and Marik yelling, "Fluffy! You're awake!"

Bakura observed everything. He and Marik were on hospital beds. Marik however seemed to only have a broken leg, a few bruises, and a black eye. Bakura, on the other hand, only had one free arm, two broken legs, and some ribs. "Wow, Bakura," Marik observed, "Joey – I mean, Steve – really beat the crap out of you!"

"Marik," Bakura asked, "How did you end up not being completely injured?"

Marik smiled. "Simple: I'm not the target!" Suddenly, his, phone rang, and Marik turned on the speaker. "Hello, this is Marik Ishtar-"

Suddenly, Ishizu's voice came onto the other end. "I predict that a special surprise will come your way," she announced, and then hung up.

Soon, a large TV was rolled into the hospital bunk, and a DVD was popped in. Marik would have jumped for joy, if his leg wasn't broken. "Bakura! We're watching a movie! Do you know what this means?"

Bakura sighed. "What does it mean, Marik?"

Marik yelled, "It's time for an MST!" He then started singing:

"_In the not-too-distant future _

_In 2011, A.D _

_There were 2 guys: Marik and Bakura, _

_Somewhat different from you or me. _

_They did crazy stuff at Target, _

_Having more fun than at a market; _

_They made many different people Lol, _

_But Joey Wheeler didn't like them,_

_So he sent them to the hospital. "_

"_They were sent a cheesy movie, _

_The worst one ever made. _

_Marik says when you got lemons, _

_You make lemonade. _

_Now keep in mind they can't control _

_When the movie begins or ends,_

_Because they didn't used the extra parts_

_To make some robot friends."_

"_If you're wondering how they eat and breathe_

_And other random facts, _

_Just repeat to yourself "They're in a friggin' hospital, _

_I should really just relax _

_For Mystery Science Theater 2011!"_

Bakura sighed, and asked, "Again, are you serious?"

"Yes, Bakura! We shall MST this 'surprise' by making snarky commentary at it!"

Bakura braced himself for the craziness ahead. Suddenly, the screen turned on, and Tristan and Duke were on the screen.

**"Hello! We're going to do some stuff at Target," Tristan happily announced.**

Marik angrily shouted, "What the frig? She got some other people to do what we were doing?"

Bakura nodded.

**Duke took out a notebook, and read, (with theme music) "Number 46: ****Broadcast K-mart commercials over the intercom."**

Bakura wondered, "How in the bloody world did they get a hold on a notebook like that?"

Marik snorted, "Again: Ishizu. She got them. For all we know, she spent all night copying this stuff. Or she pasted in the list. Or, they're using one of the 40 copies of that I made."

Just before Bakura could ask about that, Marik changed the subject. "Anyway, I wanted to do that one!" 

**Soon, Duke and Tristan went to the intercom. Tristan yelled, "Oh no! Target and Wal-Mart are closed! How will I buy a present for Serenity now?"**

Marik stated, "They're not as funny as me. If I were them, I would imitate the voice of that light bulb guy!"

Bakura yawned. "And since when has Target closed?"

"HOLIDAYS!

"Right…"

**Suddenly, a poofing sound was made, and Tristan shouted in mock surprise, "The K-Mart Witch? What are you doing here?"**

Bakura pointed out: "Again. When has there been a K-Mart Witch?"

"HALLOWEEN!"

Bakura glared at Marik. "Marik, there ARE no K-Mart Witches!"

Marik crossed his arms. "They have Halloween costumes."

**Then, Duke said, "I'm here to bring you something for Serenity!" Then, he made another poofing sound.**

** Tristan then yelled, "A My Little Pony Playset? Serenity will love this!"**

Bakura growled when the My Little Pony playset was mentioned. "If I have to hear one thing about My Little Pony again…"

Marik, on the other hand… "Which one? The one with Pinkie Pie? Oh, I hope it's the one with Pinkie Pie!"

"Marik, you're not helping."

**Duke then said, "There's smart, and then there's K-Mart Smart. Oh yeeaah."**

Marik stared ahead. "At least they got that right."

Bakura attempted to nod. "That's probably the only thing that they'll get right."

** After crossing out Number 46, Duke read, "Number 47: ****Go up to the bagel section with cream cheese all over your face. Then start chanting, 'We love bagels! We love bagels!'"**

Marik glanced around quickly. "OK, maybe I don't want to do this one…"

Bakura looked over to Marik. "I wouldn't do it, either."

**Soon, Tristan had covered his face in cream cheese, and started running around, chanting, "WE LOVE BAGELS!"**

Marik's face brightened. "I know! I should change his name to STEVE! That way, he would do the things neither of us will do! It's perfect! Perfect, I say! PERFECT!"

Bakura 'crossed' his free arm. "That could be arranged."

** Duke crossed off Number 48, and read, "Number 48: ****Over the intercom, say there is a big sale on all items in electronics department, and the first 10 people to the check outs gets one item free. See what happens."**

Bakura laughed. "Oh please. Everyone knows about the big stampede to buy the latest copies of those bloody Mario Bros. and other video games. We don't need that."

Marik's jaw dropped. "That happens?"

"Pretty much."

**Soon, Duke said, "Hey guys, big sale on all electronics. First 10 people get something free!" Soon, as Bakura had said, there was a big stampede that trampled Frank the Zombie and ran to the cash registers. **

Then, the video turned off.

Marik just stared. "That's it?"

Bakura answered, "It seems like it."

There was an awkward silence. Then, all of a sudden, a kid with black and pink hair skateboarded into the room on an alligator.

Bakura groaned. "Oh no," he told Marik, "Not this kid…"

Suddenly, the kid yelled, "HEY GUYS! IT'S ME, YUMA! THE GUY WHO CALLED THE AMBULANCE TO GET YOU! DID YOU SEE WHAT I DID? ISN'T IT EXTREEEEEEEEEME?"

Marik stared at Yuma for a few seconds. Then he noted, "Wow, this kid is friggin' hyper! He's so **EFF!**ing hyper, it makes me look like someone who is devoid of caffeine!"

Bakura nodded. "He also makes Melvin look normal."

_**Sorry that this chapter probably wasn't as funny. It's just that you can't really do anything when you're cooped up in a hospital. Anyway, vote for a song, and keep on reviewing! ADDED: Should we use Twitter?**_


	17. In Which Pegasus is FAAAABULOUS!

_** I don't own this list. Not only LK, Rinbo, and IndecisivePancake have my permission to dramatically read/make fanart of this, but anyone can, too! C'mon! I want to see some really awesome fanart!**_

_**Hello, my peeps! I just finished reading BlackRoseDragonCK's fic 'The Nightmare Before Yu-Gi-OH', and it is really super special awesometasticness! Now to the part where I stall for time with comments.**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Can I join the fangirl madness by saying that Marik is the girliest character in Yu-Gi-Oh and sings Lady Gaga? **_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Yeah, I mean, 5D's was fine, but noooo, they just had to make Card Games in Space! Dude, Melvin's weirder, with all of the HUGGING and stuff. Tristan appeared in Chapter 1! He got whacked by Marik with a ham.**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: Poor Bakura… he's probably confined in a straightjacket, giggling to himself madly while in a padded cell with Ke$ha lyrics scribbled on the walls. As for the cards, Marik's favorite character is Pinkie Pie lol. **_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS! Why would Yami Mind Crush his best friend?**_

_**Lonewolfgirl-sademo588: THANKS! Yes. Yes it is.**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS! I can't tell you, lol. I got the list from The Daily Contributor.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. I'm Fabulous is owned by Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh.**_

A while after the time in the hospital, Marik and Bakura were back in the Marikmobile. They had recently received some get-well cards from someone claiming to be an 'Immortal Angel'.

Marik had happily cheered, "Look, Bakura! The cards have Pinkie Pie on them! FRIGGIN' PINKIE PIE!" He then waved two pink and glittery cards with the eponymous pony on them.

Bakura groaned, and started the car. Today was going to be one of those days where they did six things.

At Target, Bakura read, "Number 49: Randomly start putting different size undergarments in peoples carts."

Soon, Marik had returned, pulling a red wagon piled to the brim with undergarments. Soon, he had snuck several pairs into the cars of Yami, Tristan, Tea, Mai, Duke, Yusei, and the Hair Guy. Marik then ran behind some shelves to observe. After a while, the Hair Guy spoke up. "Attention Duelists," he announced, "My hair is sensing that we've been pranked!"

Everyone noticed, of course. Marik snickered, as Bakura crossed out Number 49, and read, "Number 50: Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners."

Soon, Bakura had made his way to the auto department, and (sadly) began sampling spray air fresheners. After a while, he walked out, leaving everyone there to burst into gasping. Bakura thought, _Well, then. I guess I've lost my sense of smell. Now to find Marik…_

Bakura soon found Marik staring at something in the Toys section, totally engrossed. Bakura soon found out why Marik wasn't responding: it was because of a playset with Fluttershy.

Marik soon noticed Bakura, and yelled, "Bakura! It's Fluttershy! FRIGGIN' FLUTTERSHY! She's my other favorite My Little Pony character besides Pinkie Pie!"

Bakura facepalmed, crossed off Number 50, and read, "Number 51: Run through the store and jump on random peoples carts singing I KNOW A SONG THAT GETS ON EVERYBODYS NERVES! Oh bugger, not that song."

Marik then jumped onto Joey's cart, and started to sing:

_I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, _

_Everybody's nerves, _

_Everybody's nerves._

_Oh, I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, _

_And this is how it goes:_

Joey then proceeded to start 'nyeh'-ing in confusion, causing his cart to swerve, and threw Marik into the dressing room, where he landed onto an employee. The employee then said, "Why, hellooo there. Could I get you something?"

Marik whirled around, and gasped, "Maximillion Pegasus? What the frig are you doing here?"

Pegasus shrugged, and answered, "Well, I got tired of being evil. So, I decided to get a job that's less evil, and a tad more faaaabulous: A dressing room employee!"

Marik did a double take, and then asked, "ARE YOU **EFF!**ING KIDDING ME?"

_I don't need to tell you what you already know,_

_You're the one with style, you're the whole friggin' show!_

_The other guys are evil, and that's just fine,_

_But next to you, their looks are a crime._

The other employees turned to look at Marik. Pegasus then continued:

_Well, they say true beauty, it comes from within,_

_But you have to be comfortable in your own skin._

_So I ex foliate with this exotic cream,_

_Just look at me: I look like a dream!_

"Wait a moment! Didn't we already parody one song from that faaaabulous show?"

"Yes. Yes we friggin' did."

_You're the one, the one we need._

_For Marik's plan to succeed._

_You're fabulous. (_Pegasus: _I'm fabulous!)_

_You're fabulous. (_Pegasus: _I'm fabulous!)_

_You're the one we all can see._

_It's all about you. (_Pegasus: _It's all about me!)_

_You're fabulous. (_Pegasus: _I'm fabulous!)_

_You're fabulous. (_Pegasus: _I'm fabulous!)_

Pegasus:

_You know, no two people are like each other,_

_So don't be a look-alike copying another,_

_Unless, of course, you're copying me,_

_'Cause that gives you individuality!_

Marik then suddenly stopped the background music. He then asked, "Wait a moment! How does this begin to make sense?"

Pegasus shrugged. "Now, Marik, let's not forget who started the music number." Marik continued the song:

_But back to the matter at hand._

_So what do you say, are you back with us, man?_

_(_Pegasus_): Well, maybe if I can find my old leather._

_Hey! The Evil Council's back together!_

_You're the one who sets the bar._

_The Glorious King of Trading Cards._

_You're fabulous (_Pegasus: _I'm fabulous!)_

_You're fabulous (_Pegasus: _Oh, I'm fabulous.)_

_You're the one we all can see._

_It's all about you. (_Pegasus: _It's all about me!)_

_You're fabulous. (_Pegasus: _I'm fabulous!)_

_You're fabulous. (_Pegasus: _I'm fabulous!)_

Suddenly, Bakura burst into the dressing room, obviously in a terrible mood. He then asked, "Marik, may I ask, WHAT IN THE BLOODY WORLD ARE YOU DOING?"

Marik then yelled to Bakura, "Fluffy! He's FABULOUS!"

Bakura rolled his eyes. "Yes, Marik. We all know how 'fabulous' Pegasus is. But don't we have more to be done?"

Marik blushed, and said, "Oh… right."

_**As for the music number: 1. I wanted to see that for a long time. 2. SOMEONE MUST MAKE AN AMV USING THIS SONG WITH MARIK AS PHINEAS AND PEGASUS AS BOBBI FABULOUS.**_

_** Anyway, keep voting, and good news: Marik has continued his Let's Play of Bloodlines with Part 5! Watch it! Marik commands you too! (If you want.)**_


	18. In Which Marik 'Performs This Way'

_**I don't own this list. I give permission to everyone (and LK, IndecisivePancake, and Rinbo) to MST/ Dramatically Read This/ Make Fanart. I would also like to give last minute credit to a friend of mine for the 'Frank is buried in the Miley Cyrus Section' idea, and apologize for not doing it any earlier. (And BTW, I was looking at Rinbo's tumblr. Rinbo was asked what mannerisms Bakura had that made him look like a kitty. She posted a drawing, and on the bottom, it features Marik stroking Bakura, while the latter was purring. Coincidence?) Now, onto the comments!**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! OK, that's good you remembered. Wow, so did BlackRoseDragonCK! WATCH IT. YOU SHALL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED. And yes. He's simply faaaabulous!**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS! Nyeh? You just reminded me: I need to have Bandit Keith appear!**_

_**Animala Swan: THANKS! Really? OK! The actual MLP series is just as awesome. So, when am I initiated into this 'Herd'?**_

_**LittleNightmares: THANKS! Go ahead, and let me know when it's on YouTube! Great to see that you got around to reviewing it.**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Phineas and Ferb is the best airing Disney show now lol. I know, right? (And btw: Ryou is Ferb, if anyone was wondering.) I'll try, but it's kind of heard to bring a giant blue monster into Target.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl-sademo588: THANKS! Aww, you hate Pegasus? :( Glad you still think this is funny.**_

_**ChaosRocket: THANKS! You'd think that they were playing children's card games. And to answer your questions about MLP, I've brought in a special guest…**_

Hello, this is Marik Sebastian Ishtar! What do you mean, Rainbow Dash is the best pony? Pinkie Pie throws parties! FRIGGIN' PARTIES! And just look at Fluttershy! She's so **EFF!**ing adorable! I don't ship TwiDash, but I once walked in on Bakura hugging plushies of Twilight Sparkle and Rainbow Dash.

"I thought I asked you to keep it a bloody secret!"

QUIET, FLUFFY! Anyway, back to the commentating.

_**Anyway, as for Thiefshipping, I'll probably drop hints now and then, but no full out thing. (WELCOME TO THE HERD, MARIK.)**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. Perform This Way is owned by Weird Al Yankovic, and the song it is based on is owned by Lady Gaga. American Idol is owned by Simon Fuller.**_

"Number 52: Go up to random people and poke them. If they ask you what you're doing or tell you to stop, tell them that you're trying to find out what they ate for dinner last night," Bakura read, as he dragged Marik out of the Men's Dressing Room. Marik then jumped up, and ran off.

Soon, Marik had found Frank the Zombie helping a customer. Marik started poking Frank. Then, the Zombie Target Employee turned around, and moaned, "Stoooooop pooooookiiiiiiing meeeeee."

Marik looked up. "Will you calm down? I'm trying to determine what you ate for dinner last night!"

Frank replied, "I aaaaateeee braaaaaiiiiins."

Marik shrieked, causing Bakura to run over and punch Frank. Marik then proceeded to glomp Bakura, who pulled out the list, and read, "Number 53: Do your American Idol audition in front of the security cameras. And stop glomping me!"

Marik then dragged Bakura to a security camera, and said into it, "Hello! I'm Marik Ishtar, and I would like to audition for American Idol. I am going to sing Perform This Way."

Then, the music started, and Marik sung:

_My mama told me when I was hatched_

_Act like a superstar_

_Save your allowance, buy a bubble dress_

_And someday you will go far_

_Now on red carpets, well, I'm hard to miss_

_The press follows everywhere I go_

_I'll poke your eye out with a dress like this_

_Back off and enjoy the show!_

Soon, Marik reappeared, wearing the black outfit from Leather Pants, and continued:

_I'm sure my critics will say it's a grotesque display_

_Well, they can bite me, baby - I perform this way_

_I might be wearin' Swiss cheese or maybe covered with bees_

_It doesn't mean I'm crazy - I perform this way_

_Ooo, my little monsters pay... lots 'cause I perform this way_

_Baby, I perform this way_

_Ooo, don't worry, I'm okay... hey, I just perform this way_

_I'm not crazy, I perform this way_

_I'll be a troll or evil queen_

_I'll be a human jellybean_

_'Cause every day is Halloween_

_For me..._

Suddenly, Bakura noticed a bunch of people in the same Lady Gaga costume. Marik noticed that, too, and reappeared yet again in the meat dress.

_I'm so completely original_

_My new look is all the rage_

_I'll wrap my small intestines 'round my neck_

_And set fire to myself on stage_

_I'll wear a porcupine on my head_

_On a W-H-I-M (_Bakura: _Hey, hey, he-ey!)_

_And for no reason now I'll sing in French_

_Je voudrais son pantalons cuir!_

Suddenly, Duke Devlin arrived onto the stage, and sung:

_(Express Yourself!)_

Bakura grabbed Duke by the arm, and led him off of the stage, as Marik continued the song.

_Got my straight jacket today, it's made of gold lamé_

_No, not because I'm crazy - I perform this way_

_I strap prime rib to my feet, cover myself with raw meat_

_I'll bet you've never seen a skirt steak worn this way_

_Don't be offended when you see_

_My latest pop monstrosity!_

_I'm strange, weird, shocking, odd, bizarre_

_I'm Frankenstein, I'm Avatar_

_There's nothing too embarrassing_

_I'll honestly do anything_

_But wear white after Labor Day_

_'Cause baby, I perform this way_

Finally, Marik reappeared in the Paparazzi Outfit from the VMAs to sing the last part of the song. Noticing this, Bakura's eyes widened, and his bat wing hair spikes stood straight up. "Subtle," Bakura commented.

_Hope you won't think it's cliché if I go nude today_

_Don't call the cops now, baby,_

_I perform this way_

_No reason I should regret all the attention I get_

_I'm not completely crazy,_

_I perform this way, yeah_

_I perform this way-hey, _

_I perform this way-hey_

_I'm always deviating from the norm this way-hey_

_I perform this way-hey, _

_I perform this way-hey_

_I'm really not insane - I just perform this way-hey!_

Suddenly, Marik was back in his normal clothes, and bowed, walking over to Bakura, who crossed off Number 53, and read, "Number 54: Get a marker & go over all the barcodes with a line, then go purchase your items. The person who is serving you will have to enter all the barcodes in by hand."

When Bakura returned with some stuff, Marik went, and marked up all of the barcodes. Then, they paid. Cathy the Cashier cursed under her breath, as she had to enter every single barcode. Soon, everyone else got impatient.

"Hey, speed it up – in America!"

"Oh c'mon! It's Serenity's birthday today, and da line got held up!"

"This is really not super special awesome."

"Who wants some cheese?"

Everyone turned to stare at Tristan. After a long silence, Tristan replied, "What? I like cheese!"

Bakura sighed, as Marik loaded up the Marikmobile, and they went home.

_**Remember to vote! And does anyone know when a good time for Ryou to reappear is?**_


	19. In Which Ryou Reappears and Bakura Snaps

_** I don't own this list. I give permission to LK, IndecisivePancake, Rinbo, and everyone else for MSTs/Dramatic Readings/Fanart. And now for comments!**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Yes it is a parody of Born This Way! In fact, it's by Weird Al. And now tuning in to Marik…**_

__Hello, it's Marik Sebastian Ishtar! Bakura can't come, because he's coming down with Singaporitis, which turns your voice into the one from the friggin' Singapore dub! So, we made you a card.

Dear Ryoubakura98,

Get better soon!

From: Melvin, Ryou, Marik, and Fluffy Kitty!

"It's not bloody funny!"

That was Fluffy with the generic, non-British voice there.

_** There's a special surprise this chapter for you…**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS!**_ _**Um… ok… do you like this story?**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Technically, it's Weird Al and Marik Ishtar, but the original song is Gaga. Which mental images?**_

_**Yami..4eva: THANKS! Yami is buying Leather Pants.**_

_**Yami..4eva: THANKS! Poor Yami…**_

_**Yami..4eva: THANKS! A little warning: Frank likes brains. Human brains.**_

_**FMAfanfreak: THANKS! Ouch, poor Ryou. :( **_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Vampire: The Masquerade – Bloodlines is owned by Troika Games. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro.**_

"I really don't know what's up with them, um…"

"It's Ryou."

"Ok… so, I wouldn't take it to heart, Ryan."

"Ryou."

At that point, Yugi turned around and left, leaving the British Hikari by himself. After wandering around for a while, Ryou bumped into someone who looked familiar. He screamed, and jumped back, yelling, "Please don't stab me!"

The figure turned around, hands on his hips. "Why the frig would I stab you?" 

Ryou breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh… I thought that you were someone else. I'm Ryou."

Marik smiled happily, and responded, "And I'm…" _Crap! Should I tell Ryou who I friggin' am, or use the 'Malik Blishtar' persona? _After a moment of thought, Marik remembered that Ryou was Bakura's Hikari, and decided that using his actual name was too risky. "I am Malik Seamus Blishtar III, and I am going to do the 333 ways at Target!"

Ryou drew out the notebook, and read, "Number 55: Go up to some of the customers while you're carrying a paper bag and say 'Trick or Treat!' and if they don't give you anything, do the sad puppy dog face."

Soon, 'Malik' had reappeared, dressed as the character he was playing as in his Let's Play of Bloodlines. He then grabbed a plastic bag, and ran up to Joey, yelling, "Trick or Treat!"

Joey paid no attention to 'Malik', who made a puppy dog face. Instead, Joey focused his attention towards Ryou, who was then tackled. Ryou yelled, "Ow! What in the bloody world was that for?"

Joey stood up, and said, "I'm sorry. Thought that ya were someone else." He then walked away.

After dusting himself off, Ryou read, "Number 56: Hide under a big pile of clothes, and throw random objects at people when they walk by." Then, 'Malik' grabbed Ryou's hand, and led him into a big pile of clothing. After a while, Marik was able to throw a pair of leather pants… onto Duke's head.

Duke took one look at the pants, and cheered (with theme music), "With these pants, all of the ladies will come. Oh yeeaah."

'Malik' had just stared ahead, speechless. He then crossed off Number 56, and read "Number 57: Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying 'Good girl, good Bessie.' Your turn!"

Ryou gulped. "But I don't want to get into trouble!"

'Malik' frowned. "It's your turn."

Ryou sighed, and then picked up a large plush doll of Twilight Sparkle. He then went up to the front of the store, and hugged it, saying, "Good Twilight." Unfortunately, this was when Yami Bakura had decided to come out.

Bakura blinked, and the first thing he saw was his arms wrapped around a Twilight Sparkle plushie. Bakura growled, dropped the plushie, and went to find Marik.

Marik was engrossed by a doll of Pinkie Pie. When Marik saw Bakura approaching, the former cheered, "Hey, Fluffy! I saw your hikari today! What kept you? Um… Fluffy?"

Yet again, something inside of Bakura had snapped, and soon, Marik was pinned against the wall by his partner. "But Bakura," Marik stated, confused, "I thought that we were friends!"

Bakura snarled, in a raspier voice than usual, "You made me hug a plush doll!" Marik was thrown into a shelving unit. "You made a fool out of me!" Bakura stood over Marik, a foot on the latter's face. "But believe me," Everyone's favorite bishounen kitty sneered, "That's the last thing that will ever happen."

Marik was frightened. "BAKURA! What's gotten into you? You're never this angry!"

Bakura just stared at Marik. For a brief moment, Marik thought he saw his expression softening. Suddenly, Bakura's face tensed up again, and he said, "Stop trying to be sympathetic. I've had it up to here." To emphasize his point, Bakura raised his hand up to his chin.

Marik jumped up, and slapped Bakura in the face. Bakura stared in shock. Then, he asked, "Marik, what the bloody hell happened?"

Marik gasped for air. "Does it look like I have an **EFF!**ing clue?"

_** So, what do you guys think happened to Bakura? Again, I'm sorry if this chapter wasn't very funny. But anyway, don't forget to vote!**_


	20. In Which Bakura Threatens Joey

_**I don't own this list. Everyone, especially LK, IndecisivePancake, and Rinbo have permission to MST/Dramatically Read/Make Fanart/Make Fanfanfiction. **_

_** HEY OH, WE SAY HEY-OH, ITS CHAPTER 20, AND I DON'T WANNA GO HOME! And now for some comments! (I'm lolling at all of these theories.)**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Yes, he's your surprise! Well, you turned it into your own fanfic. That's what I'm asking you, lol.**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS! Holy schnitzels! You think? That's-**_

WE INTERRUPT THIS COMMENT SPECIAL FOR AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!

Yes, bloody furry, watch your bloody back. Why? Because I'll be there, watching your every step. And when the time comes for your death, I will be your bloody reaper. You'll know who will be stabbing you in the heart. And I won't stop when I'm done. I'll go on to killing your bloody sister, Tristan, Duke, Kaiba, the Pharaoh, Yugi, and last, but not least, that bloody imbecile Marik. And his death will be the most painful.

"Fluffy? What's wrong?"

I'm perfectly fine, Marik. MUA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Heh… So… you know what? Joey's death will be like the most painful thing in the world. And each death will be more painful than the rest, and Marik's death? Horrible pain. You know how he'll die? It'll be by-

"BAAAAAKUUUUURAAAAAA!"

Shut the bloody hell up!

"Iloveyou?"

WHAAAAAAAA – Oh bugger. Again?

"Yeah, Fluffy."

_**Well – that was strange. Can I join you in the bomb shelter?**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Brains brains! I posted 4 chapters in one day once, lol. Do you want to share some cheese with Tristan?**_

_**Mutant Enemy6789 (again): THANKS! Actually, there are 4. Remember the one who dueled Yugi? And as we speak, Duke is wearing those pants to a Justin Timberlake concert.**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS! Then, it's an honor.**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! Bakura may not be as mentally stable as we thought. BTW, I have an idea for a next fanfic: Yu-Gi-Oh and the Tim Burton Alice in Wonderland! (Tea as Alice and Yami as the Hatter?)**_

_**LittleNightmares: THANKS! Actually, that's Kaiba whose smiles kill puppies. Then again, we don't know what happened to Melvin the dog… Fridge Brilliance FTW!**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! Oh crap. Did Fluffy snap again?**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! Bad Yami!**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! You know what? Desperate times call for desperate measures but before I go:**_

___**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Everything is owned by their respective creators.**_

_** Ok! (Teleports into ImmortalAngel92 in order to break up the fight [and get Bakura a proper haircut]. In order for this to work, I should appear in your next review, Angel.)**_

_** Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! All of them? Any specifically? Well, ok. One problem: If 'Kura was controlled by Zorc, he's be screaming, "IT'S TIME TO DESTROY THE WORLD!" Woah wait. You mean to tell me that THERE'S A FIFTH BAKURA? (Dun dun DUN!) **_

__"Marik."

"Go away!"

"Marik, I-"

"I said, GO THE FRIG AWAY! YOU'RE PROBABLY JUST GOING TO KILL ME AGAIN!"

"Wow, Marik. Before you know it, you're going to become a stereotypical Goth, slit your wrists, cry tears of blood, whine about Draco Malfoy, become a vampire, and change your name to Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way."

"How the frig do you know that?"

"I've heard about how it happened to a girl. Poor bugger she was."

There was an awkward silence. Then, Marik opened the bathroom door, and walked out. "Ok, let's go."

Suddenly, a knocking at the door was heard. Bakura opened it. In the doorway was a tall, faceless, and _slender _man. The man asked, "Heeeeeey guuuuuys. Heeeeeeey guuuuuys! Caaaan I beeee iiiiiin yooouuuur faaaanfiiiic?"

Bakura slammed the door on the man, and they went out the window, jumped into the Marikmobile, and sped off to Target.

At Target, Bakura read, "Number 58: Walk up to a pizza place and ask for a McChicken."

Marik walked up to the Food Court, and ordered, "I would like a McChicken, please."

Stella the Pizza Lady said, "I'm sorry, but this isn't McDonald's."

Marik stuck out his tongue, and went back to Bakura, who crossed off Number 58, and read: "Number 59: Go to the bathroom with a cantaloupe (hidden) Make grunting noises and drop the cantaloupe in the toilet. Then say 'Phew, That's better'. I'm not doing that."

Marik yelled, "Neither am I! Wait a moment – I could use a STEVE!" Marik brought out the Millennium Rod, and a Steve walked over. "Now, Steve! Go do Number 59!"

The Steve got a cantaloupe, went to the bathroom, and did the step. Bakura crossed out Number 59, and read "Number 60: Put blue paint on your hand and when you see someone put your hand on their shirt and point at them and say, 'A clue a clue!'"

Marik dipped his hand into blue paint, and started putting his hand on the shirts of various characters, yelling. "It's a FRIGGIN' CLUE!"

Meanwhile, Bakura ran into Joey. Joey yelled, "Wait jus' a second dere! Did ya threaten me in the comment special?"

Bakura pulled at his shirt. "I don't bloody remember."

Joey cringed. "Don't play dumb! I heard ya in da comment special! Dat's it! Dis ends now, kitty!"

Bakura's eyes narrowed. "If it's a fight you want…" Suddenly, Bakura's voice got even raspier. "It's a bloody fight that you'll get."

Joey didn't know what he had gotten into.

_**- pants - Ok, I'm in ImmortalAngel92's reviews. First off, don't forget to vote! Secondly… this story is To Be Continued!**_


	21. In Which None of the 333 Ways Get Done

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission for MSTs, Dramatic Readings, Fanart, and Fanfanfiction. C'mon guys! And now… for ze comments!**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Joey better watch out – Kitty got some catnip! As for the Singapore Dub, I found episodes on Daily Motion – I recommend watching Episode 79 for Marik and Bakura's voices! (79 is Bakura vs. Zombie Boy.)  
><strong>_

__Hi. Are you bloody satisfied?

_**I think Bill the Grumpy Manager's middle name is Steve… that's why Marik hasn't been thrown out.**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Sailor Blaze: (backed up into a wall) What did I do to you?

Marik: (walks in, eating a McChicken) BAKURA! Why are you attacking that authoress? She could be a fangirl!

Sailor Blaze: Angelucie? There's your McChicken you wanted.

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Yes, it was back when you were still Azarath101. Aw, pity. I like cheese. I believe they're still tied.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! Yes, it's very adorable.**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! Well, after that…**_

Marik: HOLY FRIG! You like Lady Gaga, too?

Sailor Blaze: Yes.

Marik: And you like Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy?

Sailor Blaze: Indeed.

Marik: Where have you been my whole friggin' –

(Enter Bakura, now with shoulder-length hair.)

Bakura: Urge… to kill… rising…

Angel: Not on my watch! (Restrains Bakura)

Marik: Holy frig, something's different about you!

Bakura: Marik…

Marik: DON'T TELL ME! Did you get a new pair of shoes?

Bakura: No.

Marik: Did you wash your clothes?

Bakura: No.

Marik: YOU GOT GLASSES!

Bakura: Marik, my vision is 20-20!

Marik: I give up.

Bakura: That bloody authoress forced me into a haircut!

Sailor Blaze: You needed it.

Marik: Now that you mention it, you are a bit less… fluffy.

Sailor Blaze: And I've worn out my welcome! (Teleports to Angelucie's reviews to hide in the bomb shelter)

Yami: (Walking in) OH MY RA! What is going on?

_**Baka Red Rabbit-Chan: THANKS! GO FLUFFY!**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS! Actually, I've only played Smash Bros Brawl.**_

_**PakichuNoriwa: THANKS! What fourth wall? Read the reviews; it IS.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl-sademo588: THANKS! **_

I prefer to work alone on deaths, thank you very bloody much. And the Pharaoh's death is very important. Without it, I can't kill Yugi.

_** Well, thanks for asking, but Bakura would prefer to work alone. He also wants to kill Marik now, for some reason…**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! Cats vs Dogs. Cute Puppy vs Bishounen Kitty. Need I say more?**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Miracle, Bad Boy, Every Time We Touch, and Evacuate the Dance Floor are all owned by Cascada. Marth and Roy are owned by Nintendo. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. Naruto is owned by Masashi Kishimoto. Rotten Tomatoes is owned by Flixster.**_

__Marik ran into the Toy Aisle to witness Bakura pouncing onto Joey, who immediately started to scream in 'Nyehs'. Marik yelled, "BAKURA! What are you doing?"

Bakura paid no attention. Soon, Serenity ran over to Marik, and grabbed his arm. She looked up at him. Marik pulled his arm away, and said, "If you excuse me, I'm going to provide MUSICAL ACCOMPANIMENT!" He then ran to the karaoke machine from Chapter 20, and started to sing:

_Boy meets boy_

_You were the Marth to my Roy_

_But I was blind_

_You cheated on me from behind_

_So on my own_

_I feel so all alone_

_Though I know it's true_

_I'm still in love with you_

Then, it seemed as if Joey had the advantage. The furry grabbed Bakura by the trench coat, and swung him into the clothing aisle. Marik cringed, but continued:

_I need a miracle_

_I wanna be with you_

_Give me a chance to see_

_That you are made for me_

_I need a miracle_

_Please let me be with you_

_One day you'll see it can happen to me_

_I need a miracle_

_I wanna be with you_

_Give me a chance to see_

_That you are made for me_

_I need a miracle_

_Please let me be with you_

_One day you'll see it can happen to me_

_It can happen to me_

Soon, Bakura stood his ground, and tackled Joey, the two of them rolling into an aisle that was decked out in My Little Pony. Suddenly, the song changed, and now, Marik was singing:

_Remember the feelings, _

_Remember the day_

_My stone heart was breaking_

_My love ran away_

_This moment I knew I would be someone else_

_My love turned around and I fell_

_Be my bad boy, be my man_

_Be my week-end lover_

_But don't be my friend_

_You can be my bad boy_

_But understand_

_That I don't need you in my life again_

_Won't you be my bad boy, be my man_

_Be my week-end lover_

_But don't be my friend_

_You can be my bad boy_

_But understand_

_That I don't need you again_

_No I don't need you again_

Bakura and Joey soon emerged, both in cosplays of Twilight Sparkle and Applejack, respectively. This only made Bakura angrier, and with a cry of, "I HATE THIS BLOODY SHOW!" attempted to strangle Joey. Then, the song changed yet again, and Marik sung:

_I still hear your voice, when you sleep next to me._

_I still feel your touch in my dreams._

_Forgive me my weakness, but I don't know why_

_Without you it's hard to survive._

_'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling._

_And everytime we kiss I swear I could fly._

_Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last._

_Need you by my side._

_'Cause everytime we touch, I feel the static._

_And everytime we kiss, I reach for the sky._

_Can't you hear my heart beat so..._

_I can't let you go._

_Want you in my life._

Bakura then ran up to Marik, and complained, "I hate this song!"

Marik yelled over the music, "But Bakura! It's friggin' Cascada! Everyone loves Cascada!"

"I don't."

"Well, who **EFF!**ing cares?" The song then changed back to Bad Boy, and Marik sung:

_You once made this promise_

_To stay by my side_

_But after some time you just pushed me aside_

_You never thought that I could be strong_

_Now I'll show you how to go on_

_Be my bad boy, be my man_

_Be my week-end lover_

_But don't be my friend_

_You can be my bad boy_

_But understand_

_That I don't need you in my life again_

_Won't you be my bad boy, be my man_

_Be my week-end lover_

_But don't be my friend_

_You can be my bad boy_

_But understand_

_That I don't need you again_

_No I don't need you again!_

Suddenly, the music changed yet again. Joey sneak attacked Bakura, causing a dust cloud to appear around them. For some strange reason, Jack and Jaden joined Marik.

Marik:

_Turn up the music_

_Let's get out on the floor_

_I like to move it_

_Come and give me some more_

_Watch me getting physical_

_Out of control, Ah_

_There's people watching me, Ah_

_I never miss a beat_

Suddenly, Naruto appeared, and asked, "Why does everybody in this fanfic go to _BLEEP!_ing Target?"

Yami answered, "I have no idea myself. Mostly, I just want to see those two make a fool of themselves."

Marik:

_Still the night, kill the lights_

_Feel it under your skin_

_Time is right, keep it tight_

'_Cause it's pulling you in_

_Wrap it up you can't stop_

'_Cause it feels like an overdose_

_(feels like an overdose)_

_Oh, oh_

_Evacuate the dancefloor_

_Oh, oh_

_I'm infected by the sound_

_Oh, oh_

_Stop this beat is killing me_

_Hey Dr. DJ let the music take me underground_

_(_Jack: _EVERYBODY IN THE CLUB!)_

_Evacuate the dancefloor_

_Oh, oh_

_I'm infected by the sound_

_(_Jack: _EVERYBODY IN THE CLUB!)_

_Stop this beat is killing me_

_Hey Dr. DJ come burn this place right down to the ground!_

Suddenly, Frank the Zombie started break dancing to the song. Everybody booed, and started to throw Rotten Tomatoes at him.

"Wait a moment," Yami pointed out, "How can you throw a movie critic website at someone?"

Joey yelled over the fight, "I have no idea myself, Yug'!" before Bakura pulled him back into the dust cloud.

Marik:

_(Oh)_

_My body's aching_

_System overload_

_Temperature's rising_

_I'm about to explode_

_Watch me I'm intoxicated_

_Taking the show, Ah_

_It's got me hypnotized, Ah_

_Everybody step aside_

_Still the night, kill the lights_

_Feel it under your skin_

_Time is right, keep it tight_

'_Cause it's pulling you in_

_Wrap it up you can't stop_

'_Cause it feels like an overdose_

_(Feels like an overdose)_

Tristan started to sing along to the song. Again, everyone started to throw Rotten Tomatoes at him.

Kaiba walked over to Yami, and said, "I would screw the rules here, except that I'm too rich to actually come up with a variation for this moment."

Yami shrugged, and responded, "I'm still trying to wonder how you can throw a website at someone!"

Marik:

_Oh, oh_

_Evacuate the dancefloor_

_Oh, oh_

_I'm infected by the sound_

_Oh, oh_

_Stop this beat is killing me_

_Hey Dr. DJ let the music take me underground_

_(_Jack: _EVERYBODY IN THE CLUB!)_

_Evacuate the dancefloor_

_Oh, oh_

_I'm infected by the sound_

_(_Jack: _EVERYBODY IN THE CLUB!)_

_Stop this beat is killing me_

_Hey Dr. DJ come burn this place right down to the ground_

Duke Devlin walked over, and asked (with theme music!), "Who wants to go bring Sexy Back?"

Tea yelled, "Hey! Move over, we're trying to watch the sexy guy sing!"

"You mean me," Duke clarified.

"NO!"

Duke shrugged, and said, (with theme music!) "That's weird. They never respond that way."

Jack:

_COME ON AND EVACUATE_

_FEEL THE CLUB IS HEATING UP_

_MOVE ON AND ACCELERATE_

_PUSHI IT TO THE TOP_

_COME ON AND EVACUATE_

_FEEL THE CLUB IS HEATING UP_

_MOVE ON AND ACCELERATE_

_YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE AFRAID_

Jaden:

NOW GUESS WHO'S BACK WITH A BRAND NEW TRACK?

THEY GOT EVERYBODY IN THE CLUB GOING MAD!

SO EVERYBODY IN THE BACK,

GET YOUR BACK UP OFF THE WALL AND JUST SHAKE THAT THANG!

GO CRAZY!

YO LADY!

YO BABY!

LET ME SEE YOU WRECK THAT THANG!

NOW, DROP IT DOWN LOW, LOW

LET ME SEE YOU TAKE IT TO THE DANCEFLOOR, YO!

Bakura had had enough. "If somebody doesn't stop this bloody music now-"

Jack:

_EVERYBODY IN THE CLUB!_

_(_Marik: _Evacuate the dancefloor)_

_EVERYBODY IN THE CLUB!_

_(_Marik: _I'm infected by the sound)_

_EVERYBODY IN THE CLUB!_

Marik:

_Stop this beat is killing me!_

_Hey Dr. DJ let the music take me underground_

_Oh, oh_

_Evacuate the dancefloor_

_Oh, oh_

_I'm infected by the sound_

_Oh, oh_

_Stop this beat is killing me_

_Hey Dr. DJ let the music take me underground_

_(_Jack: _EVERYBODY IN THE CLUB!)_

_Evacuate the dancefloor_

_Oh, oh_

_I'm infected by the sound_

_(_Jack: _EVERYBODY IN THE CLUB!)_

_Stop this beat is killing me_

_Hey Dr. DJ come burn this place right down to the ground!_

Finally, the music ended, and the dust cloud cleared, with Bakura pointing a knife at Joey.

"I've had it," Bakura declared, "I'VE BLOODY HAD IT! And just for that," he continued, with the Shadowrealm entering Target, "Everyone of you is going to-"

_**MIND CRUSH!**_

Bakura dropped down onto the ground, as everybody started to leave, including Serenity helping Joey out. Yami shrugged, and said, "Oh really. What else could I do? He was going to kill everyone!" And Yami left.

Yusei walked up to Jack, and said, "Jack."

"WHAT IS IT NOW, YUSEI?"

"Card Games… The Musical!"

All Jack could do was yell in Angrish, and run out of Target. Marik stared at Yusei, who said, "What? With the direction we're going in, it's totally plausible." Yusei then followed Jack to the motorcycle."

Jaden gave a thumbs up, and told Marik, "Hey, that was great! I've got to go to another rap battle now, though," and Jaden ran off, leaving Marik alone with Bakura's unconscious body. 

Marik sat on the ground next to his partner, and held him bridal position. After 3 hours, Bakura woke up, and asked, "Marik… what the bloody hell is going on? I thought I was fighting Joey!"

Marik picked up Bakura, and as he walked out of Target, realized, "I realized that we didn't do anything this chapter!"

"Marik, can you put me down now?"

"No."

_**Whew! That was the longest thing that I ever wrote! Sorry if it's not very funny. And yes, the Joey vs Bakura Battle was going on throughout that whole song.**_


	22. In Which Bakura the Limey Kitty Returns

_** I don't own this list, blah blah blah, you have permission for Dramatic Readings/MSTs/Fan Art, blah, and now for the blahing comments.**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Sailor Blaze: Bakura? What did I do?

Marik: (emerges from a hole in the wall, becomes Melvin, and tackles Bakura)

Yami: … What?

_** I didn't understand the significance either. EXPLAIN, KITTY, EXPLAIN!**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS!**_

How many bloody pop artists do we need?

_** Yup, Everytime We Touch was in there! And don't worry, I know my pairings. :)**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS! (noms on cookie) Actually, Bakura got Mind Crushed. And didn't REM break up recently?**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS!**_

What the FRIG? But… I have a midriff and a tan and everything, and you go after the kitty? (Spouts an **EFF! **Bomb)

_** And, sadly, nothing can convince Yami otherwise.**_

_**PakichuNoriwa: THANKS! I never played Elite Beat Agents.**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS!**_

Marik: (throws Millennium Rod, knocking the knife out of Bakura's hand.) I'm sorry, fluffy, but I'm not going to let you kill anyone over your **EFF!**ing hair!

Yami: Angel, we need to talk.

Angel: Yes?

Yami: WHAT IN THE NAME OF RA IS GOING ON? When I walked by the bathroom, I heard Bakura scream bloody murder. And now, the floor is covered in all of this fluffy white stuff!

Angel: Oh…

_** What happens next?**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Who doesn't? Now I know that I'm doing well on the characters. Where was the Thiefshipping, btw? And as for Kitty, that would be spoilers. I agree; Duke has finally met his match. TELL LK RIGHT AWAY. **_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Perry the Platypus and Perry the Teenage Girl are owned by Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh. The Matrix is owned by Larry and Andy Wachowski.**_

"Number 61: Go to a clerk and tell them that you lost your son/daughter. Ask if they can call his/her name over the speaker. When they ask you his/her name, make up a ridiculous name."

"I'm on it, Fluffy!" And with that, Marik ran around, until he bumped into Frank. Then, Marik started to 'cry'.

Frank moaned, "Whaaaaat iiiiis wrooooong?"

Marik cried, "My little girl is missing! Please, oh please Mr. Zombie Employee, help me find her!"

"Oooookaaaaay," Frank responded, "Whaaaaat iiiiis heeeeer naaaaameeeee?"

Marik thought for a moment, and responded, "Her name is Friggina Tweetums!"

At once, everyone laughed at Frank, and how gullible he was. Frank cried, and shambled away. Marik ran back to Bakura, who crossed off Number 61, and read, "Number 62: Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters." Marik dragged Bakura, and pulled him to the computer section, and they got to work.

Soon, Yami and Tristan were walking by the computers. Tristan spotted something, and yelled, "Yugi, look! I was right!"

Yami looked over to the computers, and gasped. Written on every computer was the repeated phrase:

_In a few hours, the sun will rise._

Yami could only say one thing: "HOLY RA!"

At that moment, Marik burst out laughing, and Bakura crossed out Number 62, and read, "Number 63: While humming the theme to Mission Impossible while wearing all black, knock over all of the cans."

Bakura then went into every aisle with cans, and knocked them over. Marik, on the other hand, got some help (aka, three teenage girl back-up singers) for musical accompaniment.

Tea, Miho, and Serenity:

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah_

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah _

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah_

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah _

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah_

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah (_Marik: _Yeah!) _

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah _

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah (_Marik: _C'mon!) _

Marik:

_FLUFFY!_

_He's a semi-felenic tail-sportin' mammal of action. _

_(_Tea, Miho, and Serenity: _Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah, doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah) _

_He's a furry little kitty, who'll never flinch from a fra-ee-ay-ee-ay! _

_He's got more than just mad skills;_

_He's got fluffy hair and a bill _

_And the women swoon whenever they hear him say..._

Marik then started to stroke Bakura, who reluctantly purred. Marik continued:

_He's Bakura, _

_Bakura the Limey Kitty _

_Bakura, _

_Bakura the Limey Kitty  
><em>

Tea, Miho, and Serenity:

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah _

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah _

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah _

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah _

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah_

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah _

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah _

_Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah_

"Oh bugger," Bakura yawned, "Not this song again…" Unfortunately for him, Marik was singing the Extended Version, and continued:

Marik:

_Well he's lookin' real sharp in his Matrix-style black trenchcoat _

_(_Tea, Miho, and Serenity: _Doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah, doo-bee-doo-bee-doo-bah) _

_He's got an iron will, nerves of steel, and several other metal-themed attributes _

_His hair is fluffy and white,_

_And he's always up for a fight _

_So when evil hears this sound it shakes in its boots:_

Marik started to stroke Bakura again, who started purring again. Marik jumped onto a cart, and sung:

_He's Bakura, Bakura the Limey Kitty _

_Bakura, Bakura the Limey Kitty _

(Dance break)

_He's got more than just mad skills;_

_He's got fluffy hair and a bill!_

_And the women swoon whenever they hear him say..._

The three back up singers crowded around Bakura, who Marik started petting again. Bakura then purred, causing the three girls to faint. Marik finished:

_He's Bakura (Bakura), Bakura the Limey Kitty!_

_Yeah, Bakura (Bakura), Bakura the Limey Kitty!_

_Talkin' 'bout Bakura:_

_AGENT LK!_

Bakura stomped out of Target, frustrated. Marik took noticed, and ran after him, yelling, "But it's your friggin' theme song!"

_**Hey guys! I found our first deleted scene!**_

In the Marikmobile, Bakura asked, "Marik, I don't suppose you made your own bloody theme song to that tune, did you?"

Marik beamed. "Why, of course I did!" Suddenly, a random female singer stopped the Marikmobile, helped the two villains out, and started singing, along with its own music video:

_He's a semi-neurotic teenage boy of action!_

_(_Tea, Miho, and Serenity: _Dooby dooby doo-bah, dooby dooby doo-bah)_

_He's a sexy Egyptian with an Internet nerd's brain! _

_You best leave him alone, _

_He's playing Lady Gaga on his phone, _

_And whenever he's around, you can hear the bad guys say:_

Bakura groaned, "Oh great. Now I'm going to get this bloody song stuck in my head!" The singer continued:

_He's Marik, _

_Marik the teenage boy!_

_Marik!_

_AGENT M!_

_**Sorry guys. I just loved that parody of the Perry the Platypus theme 10 chapters ago so much, I had to make two more based on it. Someone needs to make these real, ASAP.**_


	23. In Which Bill Gets Involved

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to do MSTs, Dramatic Readings, Fanart, Fanfanfiction, etc. And now for the comments.**_

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS! Dude, it is.**_

_**ZukoFan2005: THANKS! I know. It's made up of the word 'Frig' and Mr. Tweetums. And yes, he's amazingly badass.**_

STOP BLOODY PETTING ME! I know my hair is soft, but does that give you reason to start getting those hands all over it!

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS! Actually, Zorc is the giant blue monster that screams, "IT'S TIME TO DESTROY THE WORLD!" Yum, chocolate chip! Om nom nom!**_

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS! Wow, you're an excited one. Here's the next chapter!**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS! I know that show! I've seen a few episodes. I prefer Agent P, though.**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS! Yes, somehow, Marik ended up being expanded on from LK's canon, while Bakura developed a nasty Hair Trigger Temper.**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! **_

Yes, yes, me and my midriff are very sexy.

"Wait a bloody moment. What- OH BUGGER! It's raining pretzels."

_** I didn't know what you meant by 'Enjoy the Pretzels', lol. When are you going to update your 'Truth or Dare' fic, btw? I posted some stuff.**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! – Joins in fangirl squealing –**_

What about ME? Hello, sexy Egyptian here!

_**He's Bakura! Bakura the Limey Kitty!**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! I thought you would. And I love the Alice in Wonderland fic so far!**_

_**Sin-sin72: THANKS! OMG, Marik's my favorite character, too! **_

_**PakichuNoriwa: THANKS! Oh, that's EBA. I've never seen the female cheerleaders, though.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl-sademo588: THANKS! **_

__ARE YOU BLOODY KIDDING? The Pharaoh's death is the most important part of the plot! Without it, I will never get the Millennium Puzzle.

_** Well, I don't think that Bakura's onboard with the 'Yami Stays Alive' thing.**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! I want to do Phineas and Ferb with Yu-Gi-Oh characters now. Oh, there? I thought it was with Marik sitting in Target, holding Bakura for three hours. Here's a teeny hint… It's got NOTHING to do with Zorc.**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! What were Bakura and Yami going to say before you gagged them?**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Huggies is owned by Kimberly-Clark. Baby Alive and My Little Pony are owned by Hasbro.**_

__Bakura took out the notepad, and read, "Number 64: Take all the CDs and put them in the wrong place. When an employee puts them all back, yell at him/her and mess them up again."

Marik ran to the CDs section, and got to work. He put all of the Kidz Bop and every other bad singer in the Heavy Metal section, and every actually talented singer in the Pop section. After 10 minutes, Frank came around, and tried to clean up. Marik jumped out, and yelled, "You friggin' idiot! This is how I arrange them! What are you doing to my **EFF!**ing arrangement?"

Frank broke down, and shambled away. Bakura crossed off Number 64, and read, "Number 65: Go to the front of the store in a baby diaper, and ask a macho guy to change you. Oh Marik…"

Marik nervously looked up. "Yes?"

Bakura then flashed the creepiest and most deranged Slasher Smile that you will ever see. Marik gulped.

A while later, Kaiba was chilling in the Starbucks, and being generally awesome. Suddenly, Marik walked in, wearing a Huggies' diaper, and asked Kaiba, "Can you change me?"

__At once, everyone burst out laughing. Kaiba, embarrassed, stomped angrily out of Target. Marik changed back into his normal clothes, and cheered, "YAY! I'm a big kid now!"

Bakura facepalmed, and crossed off Number 65. Then, he read, "Number 66: Take a friend with you and a younger child and start arguing over who gets custody. Then, have the child run away and out of the store and yell 'COME BACK!'"

_**Meanwhile…**_

Kaiba stomped back to his Blue Eyes White Dragon Jet, cursing. Suddenly, he stopped, and turned around. "Hey," he realized, "Where's Mokuba?"

_**Meanwhile…**_

Marik asked, "Do we have a kid?"

__Bakura took out a sack. "Well, while you distracted Kaiba, I was able to kidnap Mokuba," he said, taking Mokuba out of the sack. Soon, they went up to the front of Target. Bakura yelled, "Marik, you're a horrible parent."

Marik said in mock surprise, "Excuse me?"

"I said, you're a horrible parent."

Marik crossed his arms. "Well, if you need to know, I take very good care of those Baby Alive dolls. I think I'm a good parent!"

Bakura laughed. "What are you going to do, turn into Melvin and stab the boy?"

Soon, the argument turned into a slapfest. Mokuba was confused, and he cried, "Seto? Where are you?" Mokuba ran out of Target, followed by Marik screaming, "COME BACK!" Soon, he got to his big brother.

"Mokuba, were you playing with the My Little Pony toys?"

"No, Seto, I-"

"SHUT UP, MOKUBA!"

_**Meanwhile…**_

"Sir, there's trouble."

The manager swiveled around in his chair, and told the employee, "I'm busy, so don't waist my time."

"Sir, intelligence has told us that two pranksters are out, playing practical jokes at our prestigious store. If they do anymore of this stuff, our sales might hit an all time low."

Bill cursed under his breath. "Then, Ushio… I need you to go out there, and find these two… pranksters. Then, bring them to me."

_**Holy! This isn't good… Don't forget to vote, and I have another thing: Do any of you want me to do Phineas and Ferb with Yu-Gi-Oh characters? If so, I will place the cast list at the end of next chapter, and you can voice if there are any people I should recast before I go ahead with this. What you should know is that the first Perry vs Doofenshmirtz will go a bit differently.**_


	24. In Which Yami and Joey Sing A Duet

_**I don't own this list. You all have my permission to MST/ Dramatically Read/Make Fanart or Fanfanfiction of this crap. And now, for the comments!**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS! They're gonna be BUSTED! (BUSTED!) Joey's not the only one... Forget 'Brooklyn Rage'... try 'Britain Rage'!**_

_**Lonewolfgirl-sademo588: THANKS! **_

GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF MY (purr) BLOODY HAIR OR I'LL (purr) SEND YOU TO THE (purr) BLOODY SHADOWREALM! _Bleep bleep bleep_ity!

"Finally, someone who friggin' knows how good looking I am! And Bakura has been replaced by James Rolfe. He'll get back to you soon."

_**Okay...**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! **_

FRIG NO! I'm much better than the **EFF!**ing Pharaoh!

_**Yes... be afraid... Bill's finally important.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! **_

"Is it that hard to call me by my real name?"

_**They can... OR CAN THEY?**_

_**YamiXAshley: THANKS! I didn't ask for OCs, but I'll see what I can do lol.**_

_**PakichuNoriwa: THANKS! Tell your lil' bro that Sailor Blaze the Vocaloid Uxie says "Hi!" **_

"You had the friggin' nerve to say that he lost his FLUFFINESS? I'm **EFF!**ing telling you that Fluffy is the fluffiest thing since fluffiness!"

_**Why do you say that Bakura lost his fluffiness anyway? Perry Derp!**_

_**YamiXAshley: THANKS! Who's Ashworth? **_

_**Sin-sin72: THANKS! I shall. And I still love Marik, too. 3**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! Of course Mokuba was going to get kidnapped. You keep writing about Tea in Wonderland (And why isn't Slifer the Executive Producer the Jabberwocky?)!**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS! He's a 'Limey Kitty', because he's British and a kitty. Also, I just wanted a funny in joke with Agent **__**LK**__**. Hm... I don't know, maybe because MELVIN APPEARED BEFORE?**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Yes, it was. LOL. I will. YAY! A fan. No, but you'll see who'll be Doof at the end of this chappy.**_

_**Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Busted is owned by Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh. Ghost Nappa is owned by Team FourStar. King Kong is owned by Merian C. Cooper. Space Chimps is owned by 20th Century Fox. Barbie is owned by Mattel. Ashley is owned by YamiXAshley.**_

Marik pulled out the list, and read, "Number 67: Climb up a ladder & try doing a King Kong thing. Oh, is that the movie where the monkeys go into space, and there's a planet ruled by a dictator with this freezing liquid, and Kristin Chenowith plays the alien version of Ryou?"

Bakura sighed. "No Marik, that's Space Chimps. King Kong is the movie where the giant monkey climbs up the Empire State Building."

"Oh, that one!" Marik grabbed a Barbie doll, and climbed up a ladder that Frank was on, causing the zombie to drop to the floor. Marik then randomly started dancing with the Barbie doll.

_Leave it to Marik to screw that up, _Bakura thought as he crossed off Number 67. When Marik eventually came down from the ladder, Bakura read, "Number 68: Run through the make-up department and yell, 'There's a dead body in Aisle 3!'"

Soon, Bakura was running, yelling, "There's a dead body in bloody Aisle 3!" Soon, everyone had crowded around Frank. Joey noted, "Wow, dere really was a dead body on Aisle 3!"

Bakura ran back to Marik, and crossed off Number 68. He then read, "Number 69: Grab a can of whipped cream & find a bald guy. Spray it on his head."

"Excellent," Marik diabolically schemed, "I know the perfect victim!" He then pointed to Ghost Nappa.

"Um... are you..."

"Yes! I'm **EFF!**ing sure!"

_A few minutes later..._

Marik and Bakura were hiding under a table. Marik peeped out, and asked, "Do you think we lost that crazy security guard?"

"I think so." As Bakura climbed out to see if everything was okay, a large hand grabbed Bakura, and held him up in the air.

"What's the matter, kitty," Ushio mocked, "Afraid of heights?" Bakura attempted to claw the security guard, but to no avail. Suddenly, Marik stood up from under the table, and pointed the Millennium Rod at Ushio, who jeered, "What are you going to do, whack we?"

Marik's eyes narrowed, as he told Ushio, "I don't think you know who you're **EFF!**ing with." Marik then brought out a Duel Disk, and yelled, as he placed down a card, "ARISE, CHICKEN, ARISE!"

Ushio stared at Marik as if the latter had just proposed marriage to a potato. Suddenly, Ushio found himself staring face to face with Mega Ultra Chicken. On cue, Ushio dropped Bakura, and ran off for Bill.

Mega Ultra Chicken disappeared, as Marik grabbed Bakura, and made a run for it.

_**Meanwhile...**_

Bill was really, really ticked. "What do you mean, they ran away?"

Ushio looked down. "I'm sorry, boss, but that tan boy summoned this giant gold thing that was going to eat me."

Bill was frustrated, and banged his hands on his desk. "That's it! You! Are! FIRED!" On cue, Ushio was literally kicked out of the building. Bill sat back into his seat. "Now, does anyone have a better idea on how to get rid of these two?"

Suddenly, two boys and a girl approached. They were Joey, Yami, and an unknown girl who was glomping the Pharaoh. "Mista Bill," Joey told the manager, "We would like ta join you against dese pranksters."

"Ok," Bill said, scratching his nose, "I know you two boys, but who's the girl?"

Yami explained, "I really have no idea. She's been following me and Joey ever since we entered the store today. I think she's called Ashley."

Bill leaned back. "What are you three going to do about those pranksters?"

Joey replied, "To explain, we'd hafta do it in song." Suddenly, music started to play, and Joey sung:

Joey:

_I can see da things they're doin'  
>And they think dat I'm naive<br>But when I get the goods on them,  
>You'll finally believe.<em>

Yami:

_You may think it's all just drama  
>But every bubble's got to pop<br>You're gonna see just what they're doin' _

Both:

_And then they're finally gonna have to stop!  
>Don't think they're gonna win this time<br>'Cause they better believe we're gonna drop a dime on them  
>We'll get them! (<em>Ashley: _yeah)  
>We'll get them!<br>And when we do, they're gonna be busted!  
>(<em>Ashley: _Busted!) _

_We don't wanna put the hurt on them  
>But you better believe us <em>

_When we tell you that I finally got the dirt on them,  
>They're busted.<br>(_Ashley: _Busted!) _

Joey:

_Yeah, ya finally gonna see da light,_

Both:

_This is how it's gonna be,  
>When you find out that we were always right,<br>They're busted! _

_There's some new cops on the beat,  
>And we're bringing down the heat,<em>

Yami:

_Our eyes are wise to all their lies,  
>'Cause they're not that discreet.<em>

Joey:

_And we don't care what they've heard,_

Both:

_'Cause there's one six letter word,_

_It's gonna set us free,(_Ashley: _Gonna set us free)  
>It starts with a "B"! (<em>Ashley: _Starts with a "B"!)_

_It goes B-U-S-T-E-D!  
>They are busted!<br>(_Ashley: _Busted!) _

_We don't wanna put the hurt on them  
>But you better believe us,<br>When we tell you that I finally got the dirt on them,  
>(<em>Ashley: _We'll get them!)  
>They're busted.<br>(_Ashley: _Busted!) _

_(_Ashley: _Don't think they're gonna win this time.)_

Joey:

_Yeah, you're finally gonna see da light.  
>(<em>Ashley: _Drop a dime on them.)  
><em>

Both:

_This is how it's gonna be,  
>When you finds out that we were always right,<br>(_Ashley: _We'll get them! We'll get them!)  
>THEY'RE BUSTED!<em>

"Well, that was strange," Yami lampshaded as Bill laughed in triumph.

_**Ladies and gents! The main 5 characters of the Phineas and Ferb/Yugioh crossover!**_

_**Phineas Flynn = Marik Sebastian Ishtar III**_

_**Ferb Fletcher = Ryou Bakura**_

_**Candace Flynn = Tea Gardner**_

_**Perry/Agent P = Bakura the Limey Kitty (AKA Yami Bakura. He's a cat in this.)**_

_**Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz = Yami Marik/Melvin**_

_**Remember to vote! Toodles!**_


	25. In Which Bill Makes A Plan

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to make fanart, Fanfanfiction, MSTs or dramatic readings of this. And now for comments. **_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Whaaaaaaaat? Why don't you like Phineas and Ferb? (It starts raining pretzel shaped marshmallows and marshmallow shaped pretzels)**_

Holy frig! It's a miracle!

(Melvin tries to stab the pretzels and marshmallows with the Millennium Rod.)

"Oh, this is just great."

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

__If I look like a bloody Furby so much, then why aren't you calling me that?

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! But first, he'll have to deal with his unwanted suitor, Vivian… and she wants jewelry. Join in to Ushio's Life, a new comedy coming to ABC! **_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Oh, this doesn't look good…**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Marik: I'm a bit busy, Fluffy. Me and Ryou are building the coolest rollercoaster to ever exist! And by the way, your nemesis is over there…

Melvin: (dressed as a pharmacist) Oh Bakura the Limey Kitty, let me explain my newest invention!

_** And no, Fluffy. Ishizu had you declawed, so you wouldn't scratch Marik, Ryou, and/or Tea.**_

_**Mariklover22: THANKS! Lollity lol lol.**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Hooray for Dr. Melvin Doofenshmirtz! And yes, it is. Marik and Ryou will be separate from this fanfic. I thought you would like it! Ashley is the fan character that YamiXAshley asked me to add in.**_

_**PakichuNoriwa: THANKS! Where did you get that? Oh. You read the part meant for ImmortalAngel92, didn't you? Don't worry, even in that dimension, Bakura is still fluffy. He just looks more like his Egyptian Counterpart, Touzoku/Afekia/The Thief King/Joe/Whatever you call him in that dimension. Plus, do you really think that I would be that cruel?**_

__Holy frig! Why did you slap me?

"Get your bloody hands off of me before I do it for you!"

_**Speaking of which, where is ImmortalAngel92? Platypus Derp.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl-sademo588: THANKS! WHY AM I THE ONLY PERSON WHO LIKES THIS SHOW? And it will be somewhat of a parody.**_

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS! I like that song, too. This gives me an idea… somewhat.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. The Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated Jingle is owned by Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh. Tinker Bell is owned by Disney. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro.**_

__"Number 70: Dress up in a fairy costume, and climb up a ladder and when people go by saying 'Your wish is granted.' Marik, you do this," Bakura told the other villain.

Marik whined, "But I don't want to!"

Bakura's voice suddenly got raspier. "DO IT!" Then, he got into a coughing fit. "Sorry about that, I may be getting Singaporitis again."

Soon, Marik stomped out, dressed as Tinker Bell, and got onto a ladder that Frank was standing on, knocking the latter off in the process. Marik lampshaded, "It's funny because ladder sounds like latter!"

Soon, Marik started throwing glitter on several girls passing by, yelling, "Your wish is granted!"

After a while, he came back down. Bakura crossed off Number 70, and read, "Number 71: Dress up as a giant smiley face and whip price signs! Then yell 'ROLLBACK!'"

Marik then asked, "Isn't that Wal-Mart?"

"Yes. Yes it bloody is."

_**Meanwhile…**_

_Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated!_

Bill slammed his hands on the desk, and yelled, "THAT'S THE WRONG JINGLE!"

"Sorry," Ashley apologized, and sung:

_Bill the Manager in his office!_

"That's much better," Bill acknowledged, relaxing in his chair, and began talking to Yami, Joey, and Ashley. "Now," he announced, "How are we going to get those two busted?"

"Well," Joey said, "I guess dat we can try ta split dem up, and den bring dem to ya."

__"BE QUIET!" Bill then slunk back into his chair, and then said, "Now let me think." After thinking for a while, Bill piped up, "I have an idea! We shall try to split them up, and then you bring both of them to me!"

"But sir, dat's –"

"DON'T QUESTION ME! Do you understand?"

_**Meanwhile…**_

Marik yelled, "ROLLBACK!" as he rolled around, dressed as a giant smiley face. He bumped into Tea, Tristan, and Frank. Tea screamed, Tristan yelled, "I'll save you, Tea!" and all that Frank could do was moan. Eventually, Marik finished, and ran back to Bakura, who crossed off Number 71.

Everyone's favorite bishounen kitty then read, "Number 72: Walk up to someone act like you can read their mind & say… 'Sir or madam, don't think that.'" Bakura then walked off, and eventually found a girl, crying. Bakura stood there for a while, and asked, "Miss, don't think that."

Suddenly, the girl turned around, shrieked, and ran off. Bakura shrugged, and asked no one in particular, "Am I really that frightening?"

_**Meanwhile…**_

Marik, as always, was watching the My Little Pony dolls. Sitting on the ground, Marik watched one toy in particular: his favorite, Pinky Pie. He then stood up, and yelled, "Where the frig are you?" Suddenly, a loud clanging sound was heard, and everything went black.

Joey stood behind where Marik was, brandishing a pan. He then motioned for Yami to help take the unconscious body to Bill.

_**Meanwhile…**_

Bakura heard the sound, and sprinted to where it had come from. Suddenly, he was blocked by a blonde girl who he had never seen before. Bakura asked, "Who in the bloody world are you?"

Ashley folded her arms, and cried, "I'm Ashley, the one true love of the Pharaoh, and the princess of Egypt! In order to win his heart, I must stop you!"

Bakura then started laughing hysterically. Then, he stated, "You're an OC, aren't you?"

Ashley proudly stated, "Yes. Yes I am!"

Bakura, however, wasn't impressed, and pushed Ashley out of the way in order to find the sound. He then saw Joey and Yami carrying Marik. Joey placed the Egyptian down, and walked over to Bakura, saying, "So, we meet again, _kitty_."

"Indeed, _bloody furry_. Go ahead and run off to your bloody brethren."

Soon, Joey and Bakura began their fight again. Yami took the opportunity to sneak off, with Ashley following behind. After a while, Marik woke up to find Bakura pinning Joey to the wall.

"Let's end it, furry." And just as Bakura was about to finish him off, Marik got in the between the two. Bakura snarled, "Get out of this fight!"

Marik grabbed Bakura's hand, and ran out of Target with him. Just as Bakura was about to kill Marik, the latter slapped the former, screaming, "Get a friggin' hold of yourself!"

Bakura held his hand up to his face, and turned to Marik. "Again?"

"Yes."

_**Meanwhile…**_

"They failed," Bill clarified with his secretary.

"Yes," the secretary said, "Yami and Ashley ran away, while Joey was beaten by one of the pranksters."

Bill grimly stated, "I guess that it's up to me, then. I don't care; whether they like it or not, they. Will. Pay."

_**Remember to vote, and stay tuned!**_


	26. In Which Everyone Sings With Marik

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to do whatever the hell you want with this. And now for - (gets kicked off of the computer)**_

Hello, this is Marik Sebastian Ishtar III!

"And you should know who the bloody hell I am."

We decided to take over today to say that it's time to – OH WOW, LOOK AT THIS, BAKURA! Reviews! FRIGGIN' REVIEWS! My fanfiction never gets this many reviews! We should totally answer them!

"Marik-"

SILENCE, FLUFFY!

_**Sin-sin72: THANKS!**_ WHERE THE FRIG DID YOU GET THAT FROM?

"Marik, if you actually read the bloody fanfic, you'd know!"

But Fluffy, you're the only one who's supposed to know about my secret love for those friggin' Fairies!

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! **_What.

Ryou: (sitting around a campfire, roasting marshmallows) What?

"Oh, great. Now I'm singed."

I've got the bucket of water!

"Now I'm WET. If you'll bloody excuse me, I'm going to go back and fix my bloody hair."

"Um… it's snowing outside. Why would I want to take my bloody shirt off?"

THE BIG HOUSE? Not jail! Don't send me to friggin' jail! I'll do anything!

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! **_DUN DUN DUN!

_**PakichuNoriwa: THANKS! **_MARIK DERP!

"How about I bite your bloody hand off?"

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS!**_

Holy frig! Next time the Pharaoh comes, I should play the friggin' Imperial March!

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Oh, there you are, Bakura!

"(growls)"

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

"How am I not bloody lovable? Not that I bloody care…"

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS!**_

Thanks a friggin' lot! And by the way, I'm **EFF!**ing angry about the fact that my friggin' Yami appears in your fanfic, but not me.

_**Avalongal316: THANKS!**_

HOLY FRIG! You must tell me which ones you did. And what the frig happened there?

"Yes, I'm for the bloody win."

_**YamiXAshley: THANKS!**_

"Oh bloody god. She was your OC?"

Okay then… No friggin' comment. That cleared up a friggin' lot, though – (is kicked off)

_**Oh god! I just got out of the broom closet I was locked in… Hey, all of these comments are answered. Huh. **_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Friends is owned by David Crane and Marta Kauffman. **_

"Number 73: Walk towards a group of people and hit your head and say in a loud voice, 'Shut up in there.'"

Marik soon found his way towards a large group. Suddenly, he veered off course, and rammed his head into a shelving unit. Everyone turned to look at Marik. The Egyptian turned around, and yelled, "Shut the **EFF!** up!"

Everyone went silent, and backed up. Then, the group scattered. Bakura walked over, crossed off Number 73, and read, "Number 74: Put make up all over your face so it looks like a 2 year old did it and then say, 'She's horrible at giving makeovers!' and point to a random woman."

As Marik ran off, Bakura was pinned to the wall by a middle-aged man, who was very, very mad. He yelled, "I have had it with your kind trashing this lovely store. Do you know how much money we've lost?"

Bakura growled, as his voice started to become raspier, "I don't care about the bloody money."

Suddenly, the anger diminished when Marik, running back with makeup that looked like it was done by a infant. He pointed to Bill and yelled, "Holy frig! You're terrible at giving makeovers!"

While Bill was distracted, Bakura pushed him off, and ran to hide with Marik. While hiding, Bakura quickly pulled out the list, and read, "Number 75: Go up to random people and ask them if they will be your friends. Then, link arms and start to sing the Friends theme song."

Suddenly, Bill came over, and was just about to stop the two of them once and for all, when Marik said, "Let's be friends!" Then, he linked arms with Bakura and Bill, and started to sing:

_So no one ever told you life was going to be this way. _

_Your job's a joke, you're broke, and you're love life's DOA. _

_It's like you're always stuck in second gear, _

_Well, it hasn't been your day, your week, your month, or even your year. _

_But, I'll be there for you, when the rain starts to pour. _

_I'll be there for you, like I've been there before. _

_I'll be there for you, cause you're there for me too. _

Suddenly, more people appeared, and linked arms with Marik, as they continued to sing the song with him:

_You're still in bed at ten, the work began at eight. _

_You've burned your breakfast, so far, things are going great. _

_Your mother warned you there'd be days like these, _

_But she didn't tell you when the world has brought you down to your knees. _

_That, I'll be there for you, when the rain starts to pour. _

_I'll be there for you, like I've been there before. _

_I'll be there for you, cause you're there for me too. _

Soon, more people arrived, and joined in. Joey was surprised to find Yami linking arms. Yami responded to the strange looks with, "What? This is my favorite show other than the Card Games Channel!"

Tea responded with, "SAME HERE!"

_No one could ever know me, no one could ever see me. _

_Seems like you're the only one who knows what it's like to be me. _

_Someone to face the day with, make it through all the rest with, _

_Someone I'll always laugh with, even at my worst, I'm best with you. _

_It's like you're always stuck in second gear, _

_Well, it hasn't been your day, your week, your month, or even your year. _

_But, I'll be there for you, when the rain starts to pour. _

_I'll be there for you, like I've been there before. _

_I'll be there for you, cause you're there for me too._

As the song ended, Bill went up to Marik and Bakura, and told them, "Wait here. I'm going to call the cops!"

Marik, however, had other plans. He took out the Millennium Rod, and pointed it at Bill. Suddenly, Bill's eyes dulled over, and he asked in a monotone, "What do you necessitate, Master Marik?"

Marik smirked. "I want you to friggin' leave us alone!"

Bill bowed, and answered, "Your aspiration is my command, Master Marik." And with that, he walked away.

Bakura was shocked. "His name was Steve?"

Marik answered, "His middle name, probably."

_**First off, don't forget to vote. Secondly, the Phineas and Ferb with Yu-Gi-Oh Characters fic is now up! And thirdly, I'd like to take a special moment to dedicate this chapter to Steve Jobs. Without him, most of the technology he has created at Apple would never have been created.**_


	27. In Which The Duo Get Blackmailed

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to make – OMG, someone DID make fanart! Just search us on deviantART to see it. I'd also like to announce that 'Winged Dragon Beach Party of Terror' is already underway. Now for the comments.**_

_**Neoko – chan: THANKS!**_

"I'm not a bloody (purr) kitty!"

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! I'd like to tell you all that if you saw a weird, MST – centric episode before the previous chapter, I screwed up, and put it there instead. I apologize.**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS! You're welcome.**_

"Grrr…"

BAKURA! Watch it, or you'll try to murder me again!

_**Tristan has appeared before. Chapter 21, anybody?**_

_**Neoko – chan: THANKS! I don't know that song.**_

_**Neoko – chan: THANKS!**_

"I'm not a cat!"

_**Lavu Topaz: THANKS! Ok, this is a big one. It takes place in Target, silly! I'd also watch it. Poor Frank. Yes, he was buying children's card games. It's terrible, and makes me wonder why RyouxMelvin even exists. **_

Are you SURE? You can change your friggin' mind whenever you want a hug…

_** TV Tropes is the world's greatest website. And Marik was stroking him because Fluffy is so soft. Wow lol! A Brony is a (male) My Little Pony fan (I'm a girl, derpy derp on my part!). Yup, Frank's a zombie. Good info; I'll keep my eye out. MEOW MEOW! That was the point of the MST. Yuma's hair looks pink. :P I love Marik Plays Bloodlines, too! Yes, I think Marik says his middle name is Sebastian in one episode. According to theories here, it was either the Thief King, 'Kura was being controlled by Zorc, or there's a FIFTH BAKURA. Yes. Yes he should.**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! The middle-aged man was Bill.**_

BAKURA! Why did you go for Serenity?

"That was Ryou!"

_**Squarepotatoes: THANKS! I'm glad.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

__"I hated that bloody bird, anyway."

_**Squarepotatoes: THANKS! Well, true. I'll try to scale back the amount of songs that appear.**_

_**Death101 – Fox Version: THANKS! That's the whole point. XD Bakura may not be as sane as you think…**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! You could say it's a guilty pleasure for Yami.**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Ryou: Where's our cat?

Marik: I sold him.

Ryou: (slaps) YOU BLOODY *&$#*($#! (slaps) I LOVED THAT BLOODY CAT! (slaps) WHAT WERE YOU BLOODY THINKING, YOU BLOODY SON OF A BLOODY IDIOT! BLOODY HELL!

_**PakichuNoriwa: THANKS!**_

__"I'd do bloody anything… scratch your eyes out, bit your hand off…"

Get a friggin haircut?

"Oh, yes I bloody would – Wait, WHAT DID YOU BLOODY SAY?"

_**Oh, how did that decision get prompted?**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS!**_

Why, yes. Yes I friggin' am.

"STOP PETTING ME!"

_**Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Florence is owned by Ryoubakura98. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. The Doofenshmirtz Jingle is owned by Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh.**_

Marik and Bakura were pretty damn lucky that they weren't kicked out of Target yet. If it hadn't been for the Millennium Rod, they would have both been in a jail cell.

They entered Target. Bakura took out the list, and read, "Number 76: Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store."

They went into the front of the store, and lo and behold, there were no electronic cars. Bakura say, "Well, I guess that we'll –"

Suddenly, from out of nowhere, an electronic car shaped like Pinkie Pie materialized. Marik smugly grinned as he jumped on, and the car started to rock back and forth, playing the Friendship is Magic theme song. Marik sung along, and because of the amount of songs in this fanfic, I'm letting you look up the lyrics.

Once the ride was over, Marik jumped off, and ran over to Bakura, who crossed off Number 76, and read, "Number 77: Smear ketchup on yourself, lie on your back in the kids aisle, and pretend to be dead."

As they went back in, however, a girl with brown hair stopped them. She said, "Stop right there! I have all of your exploits on video." On cue, she held up a video camera, and continued, "Unless you let me join you on your crazy errand for the day, this is going straight to Bill!"

Bakura responded, "That's blackmail!"

Florence smirked. "Why, yes," she told them, "Yes it is."

Marik said, "All right. So, who's going to do Number friggin' 77?"

Everyone turned to Marik.

Soon, he was lying down on the floor, covered in ketchup. _Well this is just __**EFF!**__ing great, _he thought. Suddenly, Yami walked over, and said:

"Holy RA! That guy is dead!"

Soon, the whole store was in mass hysteria. Florence snickered, and she crossed off Number 77. Bakura read, "Number 78: Lay a 20 dollar bill on the ground and back away. When someone tries to pick it up, run up to them and yell 'Hands off my dollar!' Then, go to a manager and tell him that they stole 20 dollars from you."

Florence laid a $20 bill on the ground. Soon, Frank came by, and said, "Heeeeeeeey, aaaaaaa $20 biiiiiiiiiill." He was just about to pick it up, when Florence yelled, "Hands off of my money!"

She then ran as fast as her little legs could carry her to:

_Bill the Manager in his office!_

Bill was busy grouching over the money issue, when Florence ran in, yelling, "Sir! An employee named Frank stole $20 from me!"

Bill grabbed the intercom, and yelled, "FRAAAAAAAAAANK! I'N LOWERING YOUR WAGE TO $5!"

Frank moaned, "Nooooooooooooooo!"

Florence ran back outside, and found Marik, who was wearing extra clothes that he had found. "Hello, random lady! Do you know where Bakura is?"

"No. In fact, I haven't seen him since this prank. I wonder…"

_**Meanwhile…**_

Bakura was busy washing his hands when he was found by Marik. "Oh, there you are, kitty," Marik told him pleasantly, "Where were you?"

Bakura looked at Marik. "I truly have no idea."

They went to the Marikmobile, and started to drive back home. Suddenly, the radio turned on, and said,

WE INTERRUPT THIS SONG FOR AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!

SEVERAL NAMELESS GENERIC CITIZENS AND SOME TARGET STAFF MEMBERS HAVE GONE MISSING. IF YOU SEE THEM, CALL 1-800-PPLGONE.

Marik yelled, "HOLY FRIG! Not the generic citizens!"

Bakura told him, "I think one of them was Mr. Tweetums."

"NOT MR. TWEETUMS!"

_**Wow… this chapter really wasn't funny. Sorry about that. Don't forget to vote, and remember: the P&F/Yu-Gi-Oh crossover is now up!**_


	28. In Which Frank is Smart For Once

_** I don't own this story. You have my permission to do whatever the hell you want with this. And now for those crazy ol' comments.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

WHERE THE FRIG ARE YOU, MR. TWEETUMS?

"Why are you bloody petting me? I think you want to pet my yami, but I'm not him…"

_**YamiXAshley: THANKS! Idk, sorry. :(  
><strong>_

_**PakichuNoriwa: THANKS!  
><strong>_

What did I do?

(In raspier voice) "NEVER AGAIN!"

_**FMAfanfreak: THANKS! Oh crap, I totally forgot about the Slenderman! Well, let's just say that after Frank's shift ended, Slendy appeared and took away the 20 dollars.**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Ooh, what three?**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Ryou: (appears with gun) Give me the cat… now. OR DIE! (laughs insanely)

Agent LK: He's lost it.

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Yes, yes we will.**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Let's pray for his soul…  
><strong>_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS!**_

HEY! That's my bread and butter that you're **EFF!**ing with!

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! You're welcome; I loved Season 0, especially when Bakura appeared! :) **_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! Depending on the weather, I can act like either one of them.**_

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS! No, it's not Singaporitis. That was just a one-time gag. And again: ZORC HAS NUTHIN' TO DO WITH THIS.**_

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! You know, Yuma only does the most EXTREEEEEEEEEEME stuff in the world! Plus, it was the most EXTREEEEEEEEEEME thing that I could think of!**_

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! It will, but the ending will also wrap up the 'Bakura is going insane' thing (And btw, that will be expanded on halfway through). I could get him to reappear, sure. Hey, an idea! Thanks! Oh, the 'this chapter isn't funny' thing is because I don't want to sound full of myself.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW (Welcome to America, LK!). My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. The Gummy Bears are owned by Disney. Chuck E. Cheese's is owned by CEC Entertainment Inc.**_

Bakura groaned, as he had to listen to Marik blab about Pinkie Pie, My Little Pony, and other various topics, and Odion, who was now chauffeuring them, talk about the Gummy Bears. It seemed like that the car ride was going to last forever. Luckily, it didn't.

As soon as the duo walked into Target, Bakura read, "Number 79: Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles."

Soon, they were hiding in an aisle filled with giant inflatable beach balls. Marik handed Bakura a beach ball, and the two started to throw the beach balls onto others. One ball hit Grandpa Muto, who was knocked out. Yugi frantically ran over to him, and started shaking him, yelling, "GRANDPA! Are you ok?"

Grandpa soon woke up, and asked, "Where am I? Why am I not watching TV?"

Yugi helped his grandfather out of the door, saying, "Grandpa, you need rest." Bakura crossed off Number 79, and read, "Number 80: Try all of the sodas and put them back then say, 'Yup, that stuff's not poisonous.'"

Bakura waited around the Men's Bathroom door for a while. Soon, Marik stumbled over, feeling sick to his stomach. He looked up, and told Bakura, "Fluffy… I don't think that (hic!) was friggin' (hic!) soda…" Then, Marik toppled onto Bakura, who sighed, and straightened him back up. After crossing off Number 80, he read, "Number 81: Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down."

Soon, Serenity was shopping for calculators with her older brother, Joey. She suddenly started screaming. Joey asked, "What's wrong, Serenity?"

Serenity pointed at the calculators, and yelled, "The calculators, Joey! It's creepy!"

Joey indeed saw that each of the calculators had the numbers 01134, or as they spelled upside down, 'hello'. Joey's reaction was a loud, long, "NYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH!"

_**Meanwhile…**_

_Bill the Manager at a conference!_

"You're probably asking me what I've came up with to raise our sales," Bill announced to his employees. Nobody answered, as it was evident that they weren't paying attention. Still, Bill continued. "Well, here to help explain this is none other than Seto Kaiba!"

Kaiba walked in through the door, and sat down. Frank was the only one who noticed that Kaiba was a little paler than usual. Bill continued, by ordering, "Employees, say, 'Hello, Kaiba.'"

All of the employees droned, "Hello, Kaiba."

Kaiba then greeted them by saying, "_Screw the rules, I have money!_" Frank was the only one who noticed that what he said seemed recorded.

Bill told everyone, "Kaiba has agreed to help raise our sales if we buy 51 percent of the shares of KaibaCorp. Naturally, I –"

Frank interrupted, by screaming, "Heeeeeeeee's noooooooot Kaaaaaaaiiiiiibaaaaaa!"

Bill yelled, "DON'T INTERRUPT!" He then apologized, "I must apologize for Frank. He's – well – gullible."

Then, Kaiba responded, "_Screw the rules, I have money!_" He presented the certificate, and then left.

Bill sunk into his chair, and said, "What a good man, that Kaiba."

Suddenly, Seto Kaiba burst in _again_, this time in a black trenchcoat, a striped shirt, and grey pants. Bill looked up and asked, "Back again?"

Kaiba yelled, "Ok, what the _BLEEP _is going on with your store? I was heading to your damn negotiation, when all of a sudden, some hooligan and an Egyptian knocked me out and stole my clothes! What kind of mockery is this?"

"Iiiiiii tooooooold yoooooouuuuu soooooooo," Frank announced triumphantly.

Bill pulled out the 'certificate', and saw that it was really a flyer for Chuck E. Cheese's. He was about to have an outburst, when he realized, "If you're the real Seto Kaiba… then who was _that _before?"

_**Meanwhile…**_

The fake Seto Kaiba gleefully ran out of Target, with the actually shareholder's certificate hidden within his trenchcoat. He then made his way to the Marikmobile, and climbed into the seat, next to Marik. 'Kaiba' pulled at his brown hair, revealing that it was actually a wig, and revealed himself to be none other than Bakura.

Marik asked, "Do you have the friggin' shares?" After shaking his real hair down, Bakura handed the shareholder's certificate to Marik, who looked it over gleefully. He said, "EXCELLENT! Soon, we shall be the richest people in Domino! We will have much more money than Seto **EFF!**ing Kaiba!"

Bakura reclined in the seat, saying, "I have to admit, that was a bloody good idea to outsmart them like that."

Marik crossed his arms. "It's called friggin' genius, Fluffy."

"It was also a good idea to use the recorded tape," Bakura continued, and held up a recorder, which played the phrase _Screw the rules, I have money_!

There was a moment of silence. After a while, Marik asked, "Bakura, do you know what your reward is?"

Bakura looked away, and answered, "No –" Suddenly, Marik started to aggressively stroke him. Bakura was growling, and yelling, "I'm not a bloody kitty!"

_**Sorry that this wasn't up sooner. And by the way – HOLY CRAP! MELVIN! Oh, now I remember: he and Ryou are going to both reappear next chapter, along with Bakura's newfound insanity. GOTTA RUN FROM THE PSYCHO!**_


	29. In Which The Two Psychos Meet

_**Comment Replies Key:**_

This is whoever is in control of Marik.

"This is whoever is in control of Ryou."  
><em>This is whoever ISN'T in control of Marik.<em>

"_This is whoever ISN'T in control of Ryou."_

_**I don't own this list. You have my permission to – HOLY CRAP, MELVIN! MUST RUN AWAY!  
><strong>_

Greeting, members of Fanfiction and my newest mind slaves! I, your supreme evil ruler, am in control of your mind with my Millennium Rod! Together, we will defeat my mortal enemy, the Pharaoh, along with his host, Yugi Moto! And for those gutsy fangirls of a certain kitty, know this: I am currently holding Florence's host (No, not Ryoubakura98) hostage! That way, you HAVE to friggin' obey me, or else, he shall die!

"Melvin? Can we please just answer the bloody reviews?"

WHAT? Oh, very well.

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS!**_

"Oh, so that's why I was wearing Kaiba's bloody coat when I woke up today."

_"It was because of Marik. Don't bloody ask."_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS!**_

_ Oh, so THAT'S what the friggin' soda was! Fluffy, why didn't you remind me?_

_ "I didn't know you were THAT bloody stupid. And stop daydreaming about that, I hated that bloody Kaiba wig."_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Thief King: (walks into Target, shirtless.) Hey, ladies!

Fangirls: (abandon Ryou for the Thief King. Ryou sneaks back to Angelucie.)

Ryou: (with a gun) Now… GIVE ME THAT BLOODY CAT!

Melvin: (sniff) He makes me so friggin' proud!

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS!**_

Is Frank the one that I hugged the other night?

_ "YES!"_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS!**_

That could be arranged…

"Meep?"

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

_ "And how am I more bloody fun to pet? And I don't even like tuna!"_

_**Kat-Valkyrian: THANKS!**_

_ "But if I didn't have such pretty hair, I would lose my fangirl appeal, now wouldn't I?"_

_ Again: it's friggin' mentioned in LK's series. _

HEY! If you do not say why I am so much **EFF!**ing win right now, I shall give you a-

"MELVIN! Please don't alienate the bloody reviewers."

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS!**_

_ I must say, I don't really like being petted. I feel below my friggin' dignity._

_ "Get in line."_

_**Scaevola2: THANKS!**_

The frig?

**After explaining the KaibaCorp idea…**

Oh, that makes much more friggin' sense.

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS!**_

_ THE CAKE IS A FRIGGIN' LIE!_

I'm afraid that you can't hide from us… BINKY BOY!

_**PakichuNoriwa: THANKS!**_

_ What kind of stuff?_

_ "NO. I SHALL NEVER BACK DOWN!"_

U MAD, HIKARI? (Melvin Trollface!)

_**Baka Red Rabbit-Chan: THANKS!**_

"Um… I think that wouldn't be a good idea…"

_**OK, I need Melvin and Ryou out! NOW! Good. Hm… the reviews are already finished again. Strange.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Green Eggs and Ham is owned by Dr. Seuss. **_

Ryou couldn't help but notice that the store had seemed to become… quiet, actually. People were hiding in the aisles, just staring ahead. Finally, Ryou bumped into the one person who wasn't afraid at all: Melvin.

"Why if it isn't the limey," Melvin said, "Would you like a-"

Ryou yelled, "I DON'T WANT YOUR BLOODY HUGS!"

Melvin folded his arms. "Well, that was a bit harsh!"

"Oh… I'm sorry! Now I don't think that my mummy will love me!"

"Good." And with that, Melvin shoved the list into Ryou, who opened it, and read, "Number 82: Run up to random people and ask if they like green eggs and ham."

Somewhere in the store, Kaiba was busy being rich when all of a sudden, Melvin ran up, and said, "Well, hello, Binky Boy. I have an important question –"

Kaiba rolled his eyes. "Oh please. If you're going to ask me for another hug, NO."

Melvin smirked. "Actually, I was going to ask if you liked… GREEN EGGS AND HAM!"

Kaiba triumphantly raised his head upwards, and responded, "SCREW THE GREEN EGGS AND HAM! I have a better type of green… and that's MONEY!" Then, Kaiba turned around and left.

From behind him, Melvin heard two employees scream, "BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURNED!" Melvin stomped back to Ryou, who crossed off Number 82, and read, "Number 83: Attempt to fit into very large gym bags, then attempt to fit others into very large gym bags."

Melvin was able to squeeze into a large gym bag. He was also able to squeeze Yuma, Jaden, Jack, Yusei, Tristan, Joey, and Mokuba into very large gym bags. And unfortunately, Melvin could also squeeze Ryou into a very, very large gym bag.

When Ryou was finally able to get out of the gym bag, he thought, _I need to get away from this bloody psycho! To do that, I must use the next step in my defense. _Ryou looked at the notebook, and read, "Number 84: Bang on the pots and pans in the cooking aisle." _Perfect! I can create a diversion with this._

_**Meanwhile…**_

Melvin had investigated the whole store, looking for Ryou. He found him in the kitchen aisle. "Why are you running from me? I only want to hug you!"

At that moment, Ryou started to bang pots and pans together. Unfortunately, Melvin was barely affected at all, and pinned Ryou to the wall. He yelled, "TIME FOR YOUR **EFF!**ING HUG!", and prepared the Millennium Rod.

Unfortunately for Melvin, Yami Bakura decided to surface at that moment. He grabbed the Rod, and threw it far off. Melvin greeted, "Why, hello Florence. How would you like a hug?"

Unfortunately for Melvin (again), this wasn't the Bakura he was familiar with. "Go hug yourself," Bakura responded in a raspier voice than usual.

Melvin swore that he could hear those same two employees from before yell, "BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURNED!" Melvin took one look at Bakura, and responded, "Well, that was friggin' cold! Wait a moment, what happened to your voice?"

Bakura didn't respond. Instead, he made some kind of scream, and pounced on Melvin, the two villains rolling around on the floor. Melvin pointed out, "Florence, I think you're overreacting!"

Bakura laughed, and responded with, "Overreacting? When did I ever say that I was bloody overreacting?"

The two finally stood up, with Bakura pinning Melvin to a wall. Bakura finally finished with, "I'm just about to replace you as the most _BLEEP!_ed up character on the show." And that was when Bakura started to laugh insanely.

Suddenly, Kaiba appeared with Yami in tow, saying, "Those are the two guys who stuffed Mokuba into a gym bag!"

Yami asked, "So you want me to Mind Crush them?"

"YES!"

Yami raised up his hand, and boomed,

_**MIND CRUSH!**_

Bakura found himself pinning Marik to the wall. He immediately backed away, almost panting.

Marik walked over, curiously. "Fluffy?"

In the Marikmobile, the car had passed by a convention center, which caused Marik to realize something. "WAIT A MOMENT! Friggin' Comic Con is tomorrow! BAKURA! I know where we're going to do numbers 85-87!"

Bakura crossed his arms. "And pray tell, Marik… who are we going to bloody cosplay?" Marik leaned over, and whispered something in Bakura's ear that caused the latter to scream, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

_**Meanwhile IN SPACE!...**_

"Hey Joseph! Did you just hear a British guy scream no?"

"…I think you should lay off the donuts."

_**First off: I will probably be updating less often from now on. Secondly, soon, I shall have my 200**__**th**__** review! Third off: Chapter 14 has been re-uploaded with the right lyrics of Jaden's parody of Stronger. And finally, the following quote is from the story that they will cosplay characters from. The correct guesses will land you free cookies! Ok, here's the quote:**_

_"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERF***RS!"_

_It was...Dumbledore!_

_** So, if you know where this quote is from (Hint: It's not from the Harry Potter books themselves), tell me the answer! And as always, don't forget to vote!**_

_**~S.B.**_


	30. In Which They Go To Comic Con

_**ATTENTION: This chapter contains copious amounts of My Immortal. If you do not like that fanfic, please run away right now. Thank you.**_

_**I don't own this list. You all (especially LittleKuriboh, IndecisivePancake, and Rinbo) have my permission to make MSTS/Dramatic Readings/Fanart/Fanfanfiction of this story. And now to our comments special, already in session.**_

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS! Since the cake is a lie, have a pie! (Gives a delicious, steaming, mouthwatering piece of Apple Pie.) First off, I'm guessing that you haven't seen Zorc in LK's Abridged Series (If you have, correct me.) Zorc likes to say:**_

**"It's time to DESTROY THE WORLD!"**

_** Does this sound like the insane Bakura? No, no it doesn't. We'll find out about 'Kura's predicament halfway through the fic. (The idea you gave me was that one time joke where it seemed like Bakura was going to go insane, but his throat was just being stubborn.**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! No, it's not them.**_

"Marik? Really?"

Florence: That's my line, kitty!

_**Crazy Queen of Games in Secret: THANKS! The quote is from Chapter 4 of My Immortal. (inserts Scary Rickroll in the background.) You know, Tara Gilesbie.**_

_**Sin-sin72: THANKS! (hands a free cookie) YOU ARE CORRECT! Don't worry, I won't. ;)**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Hooray for the opposites!**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! **_

"_I am Melvin._

_Melvin I am._

_Do you like to eat Green Eggs and Ham?_

_Do you like them on a mat? _

_Do you like them with a cat?" _(Bakura Glare)

"_I do not like them on a mat._

_I do not like them with a cat._

_I do not like Green Eggs and Ham,_

_I do not like them, Melvin I am."_

_** What? I couldn't help it.**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS! (I'm a girl btw)**_

"Could I have the bloody Millennium Items instead?"

WHY THE FRIG DO YOU WANT TO KILL MY YAMI?

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

_ MELVIN YES!_

"Hm… is it RAW steak?"

_**Baka Red Rabbit-Chan: THANKS! If it were PPP, I would have placed the Mysterious Ticking Noise or the Elder Swear. That's a My Immortal quote I put down there instead.**_

_ "Why… why do I bloody need therapy?"_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

(OWCA operatives storm in, with Major Kaiba.)

Kaiba: Give us back our two top agents, or I shall be forced to SCREW THE RULES and get them back myself!

Marik: Two?

(Mr. Tweetums puts on a fedora.)

Marik: HOLY FRIG! Mr. Tweetums is a secret agent!

_**LittleNightmares: THANKS! (hands a free cookie) YOU ARE CORRECT! What is a dork face by the way?**_

_**TrebleTwenty: THANKS! Bum bum BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUM!**_

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! No, it's from My Immortal. You'll see when the halfway point rolls around. :) Well, seeing as an imposter Kaiba was loose before, and the fact that Kaiba would be no match for two murderous psychos, it makes perfect sense.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS!**_

"Purr…"

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! I'll tell you halfway through. I'll see. And no, it's My Immortal.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. My Immortal is owned by Tara Gilesbie. Harry Potter is owned by JK Rowling. For Your Entertainment is owned by Adam Lambert. Friday is owned by Rebecca Black. Comic Con is owned by Reed Exhibitions. Portal is owned by Valve. Sailor Moon is owned by Naoko Takeuchi. The Ring 2 is owned by Hideo Nakata. Indiana Jones is owned by George Lucas. Donkey Kong is owned by Nintendo.**_

As Marik jumped into the Marikmobile (no relation to the Mokubamobile), he immediately was excited for the arrival of Comic Con. Suddenly, a certain ringtone started playing on his phone:

_Oh!_

_Do you know what you got into?_

_Can you handle what I'm 'bout to do?_

_'Cause it's about to get rough for you,_

_I'm here for your entertainment!_

Marik picked it up, and yelled, "HELLO BAKURA!"

On the other side of the phone, Bakura asked, "Marik, where the bloody hell are you? I've been waiting for 20 bloody minutes!"

"Oh relax! I just got into the friggin' car. I should be there soon!"

After Marik had hung up, Bakura groaned, and slumped onto the couch. Marik had forced him to cosplay Tara Gilesbie's version of Draco Malfoy from My Immortal. Marik had known about Bakura's costumephobia, brought on by being forced to cosplay Sailor Moon as a little tiny child, and yet, that didn't stop the Egyptian from shoving a Slytherin Robe and pair of Leather Pants into Bakura, and making him wear that. Someday, Bakura was going to-

_It's Friday, Friday _

_Gotta get down on Friday _

_Everybody's lookin' forward to the weekend, weekend_

_Friday, Friday _

_Gettin' down on Friday _

_Everybody's lookin' forward to the weekend _

Bakura cursed as he picked up his own phone, and asked, "Marik, what do you want now?"

"Hello, Fluffy! I'm outside of your house now!"

Bakura thrust open the front door, and nearly fled from sheer terror. Standing there was Marik, decked out in full Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way regalia, from the dark-haired wig with purple and red highlights to clothing itself.

Bakura attempted to stay calm. "Why, hello Marik," he greeted somewhat nervously, "I had no idea that you would actually… you know…" With the last line, Bakura gestured to the leather miniskirt.

Marik responded, "I wanted to have the most friggin' original cosplay in the world! Of course, it's a bit awkward, but isn't it great?"

Bakura said, "Yes, Marik, it's bloody original. Can we go now?"

_**At an unspecified Comic Con location…**_

Bakura pulled out the list, and read, "Number 85: Act as though you are being beaten, and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions-"

Suddenly, Bakura was glomped by a girl dressed as an Android that screamed, "Hi Bakura!"

Bakura responded with, "Oh, hello. Aren't you one of the reviewers?"

"YES!"

**_Meanwhile..._**

Marik ran into a crowd, and collapsed, yelling (Again, as Ebony), "HOLY FRIG! I'm getting possessed like in The Ring 2!"

A cosplayer of Snape looked over and asked, "Should we help him?"

A Sailor Mars cosplayer responded, "You idiot, that's an Ebony cosplayer! She's probably just really into character." And they left.

Marik stood up, brushed himself off, and went back to Bakura, who crossed off Number 85, and read, "Number 86: Swing on the half price banners."

After collecting a whip from an Indiana Jones cosplayer, Marik climbed up onto a Row 200 banner, and just looked out at the crowd for a while. Then, he gracefully slid back down the whip, threw the whip back, and returned to Bakura, who crossed off Number 86, and read, "Number 87: Go up to a random person and tap on his/her shoulder. When the person looks at you, ask 'What?' and walk off like you're annoyed."

Marik went up to a group of cosplayers dressed as the four personality cores from Portal 2, and started poking the Wheatley cosplayer. The latter turned around, revealing himself to be Yami. Marik asked, "What?" Then, he walked off.

Yami turned to Yusei, who was dressed as the Adventure Core, and asked, "Why did I agree to this anyway?"

Yusei shrugged, and responded, "Would you have preferred Jack going as Wheatley?"

Jaden, who was the Fact Core, yelled, "Yo, peeps! I think Yuma's getting into the groove of things!"

Yuma was yelling to a group of people, "HEY, GUYS! I'M THE SPACE CORE! ISN'T SPACE EXTREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEME?"

_**Meanwhile…**_

Marik had decided to enjoy himself at Comic Con, and caused poor Bakura to heave a bunch of shopping bags around. Soon, two girls in pink stopped them. One girl said, "Oh. My. Gawd. Check it out. Why is an old guy cosplay the sexy Draco Malfoy?"

Bakura indignantly said, "I'm not an old man! I just have naturally white hair!"

The girl continued. "And why is that girl dressed so horribly?"

Marik yelled, "First off: I'm not a girl! Second off: I'm dressed as Ebony!"

The girl gasped, and said, "Oh. My. Gawd. Why would you do that? Only girls should dress as-"

"I call that crap!" And with that, Marik took out a wand. If Tara Gilesbie was writing this story, she would say that the wand 'wuz enoby blak wit strips of red ledder rapped around it'. Marik yelled, "It is on like Donkey Kong, lady whose name I do not know!"

And the two started fighting. In the middle of the Comic Con. The fight drew a huge crowd over. The other girl walked up to Bakura, and said, "I apologize for Mary-Sue's behavior. She just doesn't like it when someone better looking than her is on the scene."

Bakura started to walk away. "Can you please just bloody go away?"

When the dust cleared, Marik yelled after Mary, "And don't threaten me ever again!" He turned to Bakura, and responded, "Fluffy, we need to get away from these idiots!"

Back in the Marikmobile, Marik said, "You know, Bakura, I'm excited to go back to Target."

"Agreed."

_**Sorry this chapter was sort of confusing. I guess that I could've thought this out better…**_


	31. In Which Marik Holds Barbie Hostage

_** I don't own this list. You have my permission to do whatever the hell you want with this fic, whether it be fanart, fanfanfiction, MSTs, or Dramatic Readings. Now for the comments.**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!  
><strong>_

BLK: (turns back into Normal Yami Bakura, breaking the ropes)

Marik: Great to have you back, Fluffy!

Bakura: Yes it is. Now, where in the bloody world are we?

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! I know. Mary-Sue might make another appearance in the future, depending on how I feel about it. I agree on Bakura being better than Draco. And this:**_

Yuma: HEY ASTRAL! I'M IN SPACE!

Astral: I'm proud of you, Yuma.

Yuma: ASTRAL! ARE YOU IN SPACE? WE CAN BE A FAMILY!

Astral: Yes. Now we are a family.

_**I couldn't help it; I'm a fan of Portal 2!**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Oh come on, don't tell me that you didn't see it coming!**_

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! Remember, it's an Anime Convention; they're used to that sort of thing. Search Portal 2 on Youtube to find what you've been missing. Showing how big of a hypocrite Marik was with calling everyone else 'idiots' was the point, lol.**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! It was Tara's interpretation of Draco, so Bakura was forced to wear the Slytherin Robe, Yami's Leather Pants, and I'm pretty sure that he wasn't wearing a shirt - (is trampled by the fangirls)**_

_**Seabreeze27: THANKS! So did I.**_

Akiza: (arrives dressed as GLaDOS) Hey guys! Do you need a GLaDOS cosplayer?

Tea: Or a Chell cosplayer?

Yami: But-

Jaden: Come along, peeps!

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Methinks we need Fanart of Chapter 30. I so want to see Marik's 'Enoby' cosplay'. This is what the costume is (Courtesy of My Immortal Chapter 1):**_

_**1. A long, black wig w/ purple streaks and red tips**_

_**2. Light blue colored contacts**_

_**3. Black corset w/ matching lace around it.**_

_**4. Black leather miniskirt**_

_**5. Pink fishnets**_

_**6. Combat boots**_

_**Yes, this was from Chapter 1 of My Immortal. You can also fanart anything else from the story.**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS!**_

Stop trying to kill my friggin' yami!

"No. I want the real millennium items. You know: the Millennium Puzzle, the Millennium Eye, the Millennium Rod, the Millennium Scales, the Millennium Necklace, and the Millennium Key. Also, maybe the Millennium Spork."

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

"Am I getting my bloody raw steak?"

_MELVIN DOUBLE YES!_

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! Yes they are.**_

_**Dragongirl140: THANKS! I MUST READ THAT. (By the way, that was Marik's ringtone for 'Kura, mostly like how Bakura uses Friday for Marik's ringtone.)**_

_**Baka Red Rabbit-Chan: THANKS!**_

___"I don't bloody understand... Wait, why do I have the bloody urge to kill everyone who has opressed me over the bloody years?"_

_** I'M SORRY FOR CONFUSING YOU! LO SIENTO! GOMEN NASAI!**_

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! I always thought that Joey was a Brony.**_

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! Na na na na na na na na na na na na na BAKURA MAN! Yes, Marik should be lucky.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. We Will Rock You is owned by Queen. Barbie is owned by Mattel. The Doofenshmirtz Jingle is owned by Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh. The Austin Powers quote is owned by Jay Roach.**_

The duo was pleased to know that people had started to return to Target. After Marik and Bakura had not come yesterday, people thought that it was wise to return. Of course, they were acting like complete morons to think that.

Bakura took out the list, and read, "Number 88: Burp and say mmmm, tasty. Marik, get the Steve; I don't want to do this, and I doubt that you would want to, either."

Marik used the Rod to call over a Steve, and gave him the orders. The step was carried out successfully. Bakura crossed out Number 88, and read, "Number 89: Hold Barbie for ransom."

_**Meanwhile...**_

_Bill the Manager in his office!_

_Ring, ring!_

Bill picked up the phone, and asked, "What the hell do you want?"

On the other line, a nasally voice said, "I have friggin' kidnapped Barbie. She will die! That is, unless you pay me... ONE BILLION DOLLARS!"

Another voice on the other end yelled, "Marik, stop it with the bloody Austin Powers references!"

"Not unless you pay me -"

A raspier voice then came on the line. "STOP IT BEFORE I-" And that was when the line went dead.

Bill dropped the phone. "Oh no," he yelled, "They've got my wife, Barbara!" And with that, Bill sprang out of the office, and ran, until he had found Marik. Bill begged, "Please! Give me my wife back! I'll do anything!"

Marik said, "Well, I guess you said please," and threw a Barbie Doll at Bill before walking away. The doll said, "Bill! You saved me!"

Bakura asked, "You married a doll? Wow, you have bloody issues."

Bill angrily yelled, "DON'T QUESTION ME!" Then, he carried Barbie back to his office.

Marik shrugged. "Well, that was **EFF!**ing strange."

Bakura pulled out the list, crossed off Number 89, and read, "Run around with a country music CD, and sing Queen's 'We Will Rock You'"

Marik went to the country music aisle, and pulled out a Carrie Underwood CD, and ran around, singing:

Marik:

_We will we will rock you  
>We will we will rock you<br>Buddy you're a boy make a big noise  
>Playin' in the street gonna be a big man some day<br>You got mud on yo' face  
>You big disgrace<br>Kickin' your can all over the place_

_Singin'_

_We will  
>we will rock you<em>

_We will  
>we will rock you<em>

Soon, every female customer and employee in Target started to chase Marik around the store, yelling, "MARRY ME!"

Marik:

_Buddy you're a young man,hard man  
>Shoutin' in the street gonna take on the world some day<br>You got blood on yo' face  
>Y' big disgrace<br>Wavin' your banner all over the place_

_We will  
>we will rock you<em>

_Singin'_

_We will  
>we will rock you<br>_

Yami was busy buying card games when Marik ran buy, with the girls in tow. Yami couldn't help but start to hum along to the lyrics of the song. When Joey gave Yami a strange look, Yami asked, "What? I like this song!"

Marik: 

_Buddy you're an old man,poor man  
>Pleadin' with your eyes gonna make you some peace,some<br>day  
>You got mud on your face<br>big disgrace  
>Somebody better put you back into yo' place<em>

_We will  
>we will rock you<em>

_Singin'  
>We will<br>we will rock you_

_EVERYBODY!_

Everyone in Target (except Bakura):__

_We will  
>we will rock you<em>

_We will  
>we will rock you<em>

Bakura took the oppurtunity to stomp out of the store, and sit in the Marikmobile. When Marik came back, he yelled, "YOU FRIGGIN' JERK! Why were you not singing when I yelled for everyone to sing?"

Bakura crossed his arms, and responded with, "Marik, you know very well that I don't like singing."

"Yes you do!"

"I DON'T!"

Marik yelled, "Oh, come on Fluffy! You secretly enjoy singing with me!" Then, Marik turned to Odion in the front seat, and yelled, "What in **EFF!**'s name are we **EFF!**ing waiting for? Start the **EFF!**ing car already!"

"Yes, Master Marik."

Marik then turned to Bakura, pointed a finger at him, and said, "THIS CONVERSATION IS OVER!"

"Marik-"

"OVER, I SAY! OVER!"

_**Guys, the time has come to make this fic known! We must make dramatic readings, MSTs, Fanart! (And maybe just a TV Tropes page. You know what: let's make a TV Tropes page/recommendation) So, don't forget to vote, and stay tuned to the madness!**_


	32. In Which Marik Gets Ticked At Bakura

_** I don't own this list. You have my permission for MSTs, Dramatic Readings, Fanart, Fanfanfiction, et cetera. Now for the comment special, already diabolical.**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS! **_

"Can I have the other bloody items?"

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS!**_

_"Um… ok… (kiss). Does this work?"_

_** Ok, we need fanart of Marik and Bakura in their cosplays at Comic Con, Marik, Jack and Jaden singing 'Evacuate the Dancefloor', Bakura disguised as Kaiba and tricking Bill, fanart of Bill and Frank:**_

_**Frank: chubby employee with short curly red hair**_

_**Bill: Middle aged businessman w/ grey hair and a suit**_

_** ETC, Etc… oh, I hope I'm not wearing you out with all of these! You can do stuff from other chapters, but I'd like to see these.**_

_**Mademoiselle Evandra: THANKS! A lot of people love them some Ryou. You're welcome!**_

_**Crazy Queen of Games in Secret: THANKS! I need friends like those two, too.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

"(sigh) Please."

_**Yes. Yes he did.**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! **_

Yuma: SPACE IS EXTREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEME!

Astral: I agree. He's an idiot.

YES! My true plan is to sing tons of songs and bring in the friggin' fangirls! Together, we shall destroy the Pharaoh!

…A little.

…Inside.

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS!**_

'Mark': Whu?

"YES! I SHALL HAVE ULTIMATE POWER! (insane laughter)"

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! Everyone does.**_

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! OMG. YOU. MUST. DO. THAT. PLEASE. Let me know when it's nice and ready, because I'm placing you in charge of troping this story!**_

_**Baka Red Rabbit-Chan: THANKS! **_

_"But… I don't want to be insane! _(sniff) _If I'm insane, my mummy won't think that I am a good boy! And I love my mummy. She's the only one who cares about me. _(crying slowly turns into insane laughter) _On second thought… I'll consider that offer… MUA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!"_

Oh frig… we are totally **EFF!**ed.

"I bloody agree."

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! I'd be chasing Marik or 'Kura. **_

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! I bet that they did. :3**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! That part was fun to write.**_

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! Yes, yes he is. Poor, poor Fluffy.**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Marik: (takes off shirt, and chucks it at Ryou) Will you hold this for me? I need to go impress my friggin' fangirls.

Bakura: (nosebleeds)

Ryou: Stop that.

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! A lot of people love it. **_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Barbie is owned by Mattel. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. The Hulk reference is owned by Marvel. The busload of Phineas and Ferb references is owned by Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh. The Gummy Bears are owned by Disney.**_

Marik and Bakura climbed out of the Marikmobile, and headed into Target. Bakura pulled out a list, and read, "Number 91: Throw random items over into the next aisle, and see if you can score into someone's cart."

Marik grabbed Bakura's hand, and led him around the store, picking up random stuff. Soon, they came to an aisle, and chucked the stuff over into the next aisle. Suddenly, Bakura looked at what they were throwing: boxes upon boxes of My Little Pony toys.

Suddenly, Bakura pinned Marik down, and growled, "Marik, I've truly had it with these bloody ponies."

Marik whimpered, "But I like these ponies!"

Bakura leaned into Marik's ear, and whispered, "Don't make me angry. You won't like it when I'm bloody angry."

Marik pushed Bakura off of him, and angrily stormed off, with the list in tow. After finding a good hiding spot from Bakura, Marik crossed off Number 91, and read, "Number 92: Ride around in a Barbie jeep with Barbie in the front seat and act like you're talking to her by saying 'Let's bust this joint!'"

Soon, Marik was driving around the store, with Barbie (the same one that was married to Bill). Marik wrapped his arm around Barbie, and said, "Come on! Let us raid the office!"

_**Meanwhile…**_

_Bill the Manager in his office!_

Bill was filing paperwork when Marik kicked the door down, Barbie in his hand. Bill stood up, grabbed Barbie, and yelled, "How could you? I thought that we had something together!"

A tear rolled down the plastic doll's face. Barbie said, "I'm sorry, Bill. It's just that we've been growing apart for a while. And then, I met this cutie-"

Bill yelled, "THAT'S IT! When we get home, I am filing for a divorce!" Then, he grabbed the list from Marik, and read, "Hm… Number 93: Wrap a hose around you and shout, 'AAH! I'M BEING HELD HOSTAGE!' I know just what to do with you…"

Marik searched frantically for the Millennium Rod, only to find that it had disappeared. He looked up at Bill, and gulped.

_**Meanwhile…**_

Bakura stomped around the store, shouting, "Marik! Where the bloody hell are you?" After the Egyptian had left, Bakura had been searching the entire story for him.

Suddenly, a voice came onto the intercom and said, "_Will a Mr. Yami Bakura please report to the office of Bill A. Manager immediately?_"

Bakura ran off to Bill's office, and thrust the door open, cueing the jingle:

_Bill the Manager in his –_

Bakura interrupted the jingle by yelling, "WILL YOU BLOODY SHUT UP ALREADY?" Suddenly, he saw Marik tied up in a corner, and Bill sitting in his desk.

Bill said, "Ah, Yami Bakura. How very unexpected. And by expected, I mean-"

"You realize that I don't want to hear another bloody Phineas and Ferb reference?"

Bill chuckled. "Well, as you can see, I'm holding your little accomplice hostage."

Marik screamed, "Help me, Fluffy!"

Bakura crossed his arms, and asked, "Pray tell, what are you going to do about him?"

Bill thought for a while. Then, he responded, "Now that you mention it, maybe I'll call for the police. I've heard that a previous employee became one of their top officers. I believe his name was Ushio."

Bakura snarled, "You wouldn't."

Bill smiled. "Oh yes I would."

At this point, Bakura completely snapped. He pounced onto Bill, knocking several filing cabinets over. A letter opener came down on the ropes, setting Marik free. He stood up, and witnessed Bakura over the unconscious body of Bill, prepared to finish the manager off.

Marik yelled, "BAKURA!" Bakura turned to Marik, who continued, "Bakura, if you kill him, Frank will be his friggin' replacement! This store would be worse off than before! Also, killing is bad for your health!"

Bakura said in that dreaded raspier voice, "Does it look like I care?"

Marik crossed his arms, and yelled, "Just friggin' forget it." He then ran back out to the Marikmobile. Bakura came to his senses, and followed, yelling, "Marik! Get back here!"

"NO! You're just going to act like a friggin' jerk like always!"

Bakura stopped Marik, and said, "Marik, you are overreacting."

"I NEVER OVERREACT!"

Bakura said, "Marik, calm the hell down!"

Marik screamed back, "NOT UNTIL YOU DO, YOU-"

Bakura did the only thing that would bring Marik to his senses: he slapped him. Marik then mumbled, "Thanks for that."

No one spoke in the Marikmobile at all. Well, maybe except for Odion, who mainly ranted about the Gummy Bears, and Marik, who was yelling at Odion to stop ranting about the Gummy Bears. Bakura just stared at the window.

_**Ladies and gentlemen, you just witnessed something completely different: a dramatic chapter. So… don't forget to vote, get the word spread, and sit tight for chapter 31! I know that – dare I say it? – this wasn't as funny as everything else, but hey, I tried my best!**_


	33. In Which Ishizu Saves The Fanfic

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to do stuff with this fic. Now for the comments.**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! **_

_ "Oh… ok."_

_** Let me know when the fanart's up!**_

_**Raspberry 14: THANKS! Why, yes. Yes he does.**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS!**_

"What in the bloody world is with all of these weird fantasies with me? My insanity, me being held hostage, and me being pet like a cat! It's bloody madness!"

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice (formerly Baka Red Rabbit Chan): THANKS! **_

_ "Heh… why don't we start with… that bloody psycho who tried to kill me?"_

_ HIKARI! HELP ME! I'm __**EFF!**__ed!_

MELVIN! Can't you see that I'm friggin' busy?

_**VampiressBeauty20: THANKS! It is.**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS!**_

"I don't know what you are bloody talking about."

_** I refer to Marik as either Marik (Hikari) or Melvin (Yami).**_

_**Squarepotatoes: THANKS! Yes, in Chapter 28! If you mean this chapter, can you please point out where?**_

_**NinjaJudai19: THANKS! I'll see what I can do.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! I guess that the Rod either fell into an annoying plot hole, or it got lost in Hammerspace.**_

(murders steak) "Ah, I do love some bloody steak. Now, Marik, get this bloody fangirl off of me!"

NO!

_**Animala Swan: THANKS! Is it wrong to say that I don't know how to respond?**_

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! (lols) It was a typo, but it could be a hilarious Meta pun. (And for those who were wondering what happened to Bill's middle name being Steve, he doesn't use Steve on his official documents.) Just call it Marik and Bakura: 333 Ways.**_

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! Yes. Yes he is.**_

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! Zexal is the new Yu-Gi-Oh series. I saw the beginning of Episode 1 in English… I hated it. Yuma's voice annoyed me.**_

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS! You're welcome! Oh, she does? Ok. **_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS!**_

No. I'm just friggin' mad because SOMEBODY WHO I SHALL NOT FRIGGIN' MENTION acted like a total jerk!

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

_**(turns Bakura back to normal)**_

Marik: Am I not sexy? :(

Bakura: Bugger… what is this plan you have?

_** It's not the end… yet. You'll see what happens to save the day in this chapter. (Of course, from the title of this chapter, you should know WHO saves it.)**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! Whu?**_

BUT I'M NOT A FRIGGIN' GIRL!

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! You know, if Bakura hadn't slapped Marik, what you were bracing for may have very well become canon.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Star Wars is owned by George Lucas. Hellion is owned by Judas Priest.**_

_DOUBLE FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE! (Insert Hellion Opening Here)_

_**Meanwhile, somewhere under the sea…**_

No, wait, wait, WAIT! Meanwhile guy, this is the narrator speaking! The authoress wants you to go back further!

"…Why?"

Because… she needs to get something explained before this chapter starts up.

_**Meanwhile, in Chapter 32…**_

_ As Marik ran out of the store, Bakura angrily followed him out. Unfortunately, everyone's favorite bishounen kitty didn't realize that he had dropped the notepad on the floor. _

_ When the Marikmobile left, three others found it. One with spiky brown hair picked up the notepad, and asked, "Crikey! Do ya think that he'd find use in this?"_

_ A muscular man with spiky blond hair shrugged. "Well, Valon, your guess is as good as mine."_

_**Meanwhile, somewhere under the sea…**_

_DOUBLE FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE! (Insert Hellion Opening Here)_

The three others stood in front of Dartz, their great leader. One of them – Alister – announced, "Oh great master Dartz, we have found something that could be of use!"

Dartz inspected the list and replied, "Well 'hen, 'his does sound like a good idea..." Then, he said, "GENTLEMEN! We gonna take 'his list…we gonna take it to Target… and we gonna DUE IT!"

Rafael cocked his head in confusion. "Boss, did you say 'do' or 'duel?'"

"I SAID DUUUUUUUUUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEEE! Idyotts!"

Valon shrugged, saying, "I think I understood what he said that time, mate."

_**Meanwhile…**_

Ishizu went to tell Marik that she was going to go grocery shopping, only to find him and Bakura sitting on opposite ends of the couch. She walked over, and asked, "Marik, what is going on?"

Marik yelled, "ISHIZU! That friggin' limey broke into our house… and he SAT ON OUR FRIGGIN' COUCH!"

Ishizu crossed her arms, and said, "Marik, I don't know anyone who breaks into people's homes to sit on the couch."

"EXACTLY! That's what makes it so friggin' horrible!"

Ishizu shrugged. "Well, I'm going to Target to buy groceries. I better not predict that you two get into trouble."

Marik yelled to the other side of the couch, "Do you hear that? She doesn't want any trouble!"

"Marik, I'm not bloody deaf!"

_**Meanwhile, at Target…**_

Rafael read the list. "Number 94: Do your own radio show over the intercom – What kind of list is this?"

Everyone shrugged. Rafael responded, "Well, Alister, I guess that this is you."

Alister went up to the intercom, and said, "Welcome to the official Radio Station of the Great and Powerful Dartz! Today, we have taken over these chain stores in order to…"

As Alister went on with the station, Rafael crossed off Number 94, and read, "Number 95: Go to the aisle with the Star Wars stuff and hold up a Luke Skywalker toy, and say 'Luke, I am your father'. Make breathing noises in your Darth Vader mask."

Soon, Rafael reappeared, dressed as Darth Vader. _I look like a total idiot, _he thought. He went up, and said to a doll of Luke Skywalker, "LUKE! I am… YOUR FATHER!"

Somewhere across the store, Mokuba said, "Big brother, I don't want to be near the man dressed as-"

"SHUT UP, MOKUBA!" Kaiba continued to drag Mokuba to the exit. "Hobson, make sure to go to checkout."

Hobson yelled, "HOBSON BUY GROCERIES FOR SETO!"

Rafael crossed off Number 95, and read, "Number 96: Glue pennies on the floor 'heads' side up."

Soon, Ishizu came buy, holding a plethora of grocery bags. She stopped, and said, "Ooh, a penny!"

Suddenly, Dartz teleported next to Rafael and Valon, because the plot demanded him to. He said, "Hey, 'hat's Mah-rick Ishtar's sister over 'here!"

Valon replied, "Crikey! What do you want us to do?"

Dartz thought for a while. Then, he replied, "We gonna go up to Eh-she-sue Ishtar… and we gonna take those god coids from her dyhck!"

Both henchmen looked totally confused. Then, Rafael asked, "What did you just say?"

Dartz yelled, "WE GONNA TAKE THE GOD COIDS! How hoid is it to due 'hat I'm tellin' you to due?"

As Ishizu struggled to pick up the coin, Rafael came over, and awkwardly ordered, "Give us the… um… God… something with a C…"

Ishizu angrily responded, "I don't have the God Cards anymore." Suddenly, she noticed the list in Rafael's hand. She grabbed it, and yelled, "That's my brother's list!" Then, she left.

Rafael and Valon stared ahead. Rafael noted, "Well, that was strange. Come on, Valon, let's get Alister and leave."

_**Meanwhile, at the Ishtar's house…**_

Ishizu entered the house to find all of the furniture blown back, and a huge dust cloud in the center of the room. Ishizu didn't have to predict the future to know what had just happened, and pulled Marik and Bakura out.

"Ok," she angrily asked, "What happened here?" Marik and Bakura both started to talk at once, causing Ishizu to yell, "ONE AT A TIME!"

Marik took the liberty of explaining it. "Well, I was trying to be a decent person, and this Limey jerk said, 'Get some bloody intelligence!' I told him, 'Get a **EFF!**ing haircut!' And then, he jumped on me."

Bakura yelled, "I did not bloody jump on you! I just said for you to bloody leave me alone, and then you started to try and bloody stab me!"

The two proceeded to continue arguing with one another, and Ishizu finally said, "Well, I guess that because you're acting like children, I can't tell you that I saw those motorcycle people from Season 4 doing your list!"

This was what silenced the duo. Then, Ishizu threw the list at Marik, and walked out, leaving Marik and Bakura gaping at one another.

Finally, Marik picked up the list, and said, "FLUFFY! Are you willing to never speak of this friggin' moment ever again?"

Bakura shrugged. This caused Marik to grin evilly, and say, "Well, Bakura… I know what we're going to do tomorrow! We're going to go to Target!"

_**FOLKS! WE'RE BACK IN BUSINESS! (Throws confetti around the room) Vote, get ready for the announcement of our TV Tropes page, and stay tuned for Chapter 34, where we return to our regular schedule!**_


	34. In Which We Reference Another Anime

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to do whatever you want with this. Now for those crazy comments.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! Yes. Yes he is.**_

"(hisses) Don't you bloody touch me!"

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS! **_

_ "Hm… I like the ideas of stabbing all of the internals in alphabetical order and death by fangirls/boys…"_

FLUFFY! Your hikari is planning on how to kill me! It's a friggin' Code 74!

"(places Millennium Ring on Marik, taking control of him."

YOU FRIGGIN' IDIOT! WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!

_**Angelucie: THANKS! Um… the manager's name is BILL. He was too busy filing for divorce to do anything.**_

"UNTIE ME THIS BLOODY INSTANCE!"

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Not now. Maybe later…**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! **_

"Chewbacca."

"YES, HAN!"

"There's something you should know."

"WHAT IS IT, HAN?"

"Lightsaber Duels… ON MOTORCYCLES!"

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Please change it back to Fluffy. And btw, when are you going to update Truth or Dare and Elemental Staffs?**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS!**_

FOOLISH FOOLS! _This_ is how you interrogate Bakura! First, you uncap the Millennium Rod… (does that)

"Um… Marik?"

Then, you place Bakura in a friggin' headlock… (Does that)

"Marik, what the bloody hell are you doing?"

And then, you take his most prized possession, and you threaten it! (Grabs a lock of Bakura's hair, and places the Millennium Rod over it, threatening to bring it down at any moment) Then, when he doesn't answer any questions, slice his most prized possession with the rod! (Doesn't actually do that, but raises Rod hand high in the air) Wash, rinse, and repeat until his prized possession is destroyed! FOREVER! Nyahahahahahaha!

"Marik, have you been spending too much time with Melvin again?"

SILENCE, OR YOU SHALL GET A HUG! Anyway, ask away, gentlemen… because I will make friggin' sure that your **EFF!**ing questions are answered.

"Marik… are you threatening my hair?"

No, Fluffy, I'm highly implying that I'm threatening your hair. Now, that's how you do it! No pinning to the wall and that sort of crap! Trust me… I've done it before! MANY TIMES BEFORE! And he has to suffer possibly losing his most prized possession… MANY TIMES BEFORE!

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS!**_

This isn't true! I am the manliest man since masculinity!

"Who are you bloody talking to? (purr)"

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Wait, are you talking about Card Games or what I think you're talking about?**_

_**Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh. Hershey is owned by Hershey's. Fly Away Now is owned by Teddyloid. The anime transformation that gets parodied is owned by Gainax. The speech they make during this transformation is also owned by Gainax.**_

Marik and Bakura entered Target, this time no longer arguing. Bakura drew out the list, and read, "Number 97: Knock over all the shelves, and run around screaming 'EARTHQUAKE! EVERYONE RUN!'"

Suddenly, Serenity saw a shelf about to fall onto her. She screamed, "SOMEBODY HELP ME!"

Another voice came into the picture: Tristan's. He cried, "I'll save you, Serenity! My voice and my love for you gives me super strength!" He dove, and pushed Serenity out of the way of the shelves.

Unfortunately, Joey wasn't lucky, and screamed, "NYEH!" A shelf came down, and was about to pin him there, when Yami helped him out.

Marik ran back to Bakura, who crossed off Number 97, and read, "Number 98: Find a pair of walkie talkies, and have a conversation with your self when everyone is watching you. Marik, would it be wrong if I suggest that we change this up a little?"

Marik shrugged. "Why not?"

Soon, Marik said into a Walkie Talkie, "Bakura, did you hear about the Zorc and Pals theatrical movie that I sold that script of yours to?"

"Yes, Marik," Bakura said into another Walkie Talkie.

"Well, apparently, they made several major edits, and it turns out that the movie bombed!"

Bakura cursed under his breath. "Marik, who did you sell the bloody script to?"

Marik replied, "Well, let's see… it was sold to Michael Bay, two guys named Seltzerberg, It's A Laugh Productions, Disney-"

"YOU IDIOT! Did you not know that a combination of those four would be disastrous?"

Everyone was staring, so Marik put away the walkie-talkie, and went back to Bakura. Bakura crossed off Number 98, and read, "Number 99: Go to the checkout and buy a bar of candy. Repeat, going to the same cash register, until the clerk notices."

Marik did as so. Eventually, Cathy the Cashier asked, "Dude, I know we love Halloween, but isn't this a bit much?"

Marik shrugged. Just as he and Bakura were about to leave, though, the sliding doors slammed shut, and the lights turned off. Suddenly dark tendrils of smoke started to enter the store.

From these dark tendrils came a shadowy lady dressed in pink. She boomed, "I AM THE FANGIRL GHOST!" (Apologies to fangirls everywhere!)

Marik started laughing hysterically. Then, he said, "No, you're not."

The Fangirl Ghost replied, "I have come to manipulate innocent male anime characters to do my bidding!"

Bakura turned to the Fourth Wall, and broke it by lampshading, "You know, you never really hear about manipulating _guilty _people."

Suddenly, dark tendrils of smoke came out of the ground, binding Bakura. The Fangirl Ghost glided over to him, and said, "Now… why are you with _him_?"

Marik indignantly commented, "HELLO! I have a **EFF!**ing name, you know!"

The Fangirl Ghost ignored Marik, and continued by saying, "Oh, come now… you know that he's been holding you back for a long, long time."

Bakura seemed to be taking this in, repeating, "He's been…" Being the narrator, I should also point out that Bakura's eyes were glazing over.

The Fangirl Ghost glided over to Marik, and said, "Well, if you truly want to save your friend… you must declare your love for him."

Marik yelled, "NO! Not a clichéd romance fanfiction plotline!"

"Oh, yes, a clichéd romance fanfiction plotline," The Fangirl Ghost told him. "Now… do you want to save him, or not?"

There was a really awkward silence. Finally, Marik spoke up by saying, "FINE! Bakura…"

Bakura, eyes starting to regain life in them, asked, "What, Marik?"

"I love you… PLATONICALLY!"

This confused the Fangirl Ghost so much, the tendrils on Bakura shrunk back, and everyone's favorite Limey Kitty rejoined Marik. Bakura said, "You really found a bloody loophole to her trick?"

Marik replied, "Yes, Bakura. Now… FLUFFY!"

"Marik."

"Let's do this!"

"Do what-" But before Bakura could finish his statement, Marik started singing:

_Heart stood still, when we first met,_

_I thought we'd be together, yet,_

_You're using me, for your own gain,_

_And now I NEVER FEEL THE SAME!_

Bakura asked, "What the bloody hell was that for?"

Marik snapped his fingers, and suddenly, a familiar tune began playing:

_FLY AWAY NOW!_

_FLY AWAY NOW!_

_FLY AWAAAAAAY!_

_FLY AWAY NOW!_

_FLY AWAY NOW!_

_FLY AWAAAAAAY!_

Marik and Bakura then reappeared, dressed as… well, in what the main characters of the parody of this certain anime would wear in this scene. Bakura asked, "Marik! Why am I dressed as a bloody girl?"

Marik yelled, "SILENCE, FLUFFY! Our big speech is coming up!" Marik then revealed the Millennium Rod. As Bakura took off the Millennium Ring, they began the speech:

_Oh fangirling spirit, born of a fanatical soul in Mysterious Limbo Dimension 127,_

_Receive punishment from two effeminate men in frilly white dresses,_

_Cleansed of fanatical impurities,_

_Return to wherever you went when you died from Earth!_

_LEAVE!_

Marik fired a beam from the Millennium Rod, hitting The Fangirl Ghost squarely in the chest. Bakura then took off two of the sharp protrusions on the Millennium Ring, and threw them at the ghost.

The Fangirl Ghost declared, "I'll be back!" Then, she vanished. Into thin air.

Now back in their normal clothing, there was a moment of silence. Bakura then asked Marik, "What in the bloody world did all of THAT come from?"

Marik shrugged. "Let the reviewers figure it out themselves."

_**Whoever guesses what anime was parodied at the end of this chapter gets yet another free cookie. So, check out our article on Yu-Gi-Oh's fanfiction recommendations on TV Tropes, vote, and stay tuned as always!**_


	35. In Which Shadi Finally Appears

_**HAPPY EARLY HALLOWEEN, READERS!**_

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to do whatever the hell you want with this fic. And now for the comments!**_

_**SuperSayinLv9000: THANKS!**_

"You better not bloody do what I think you're going to do… MARIK, BLOODY HELP ME!"

_**Meanwhile…**_

(hugging a plush Pinkie Pie doll) Oh, Pinkie Pie! You are my only friend in this entire friggin' world!

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! Don't forget that it's also made by Michael Bay (Transformers 2), Seltzerberg (Disaster Movie), and It's A Laugh Productions (Hannah Montana). **_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

"Oh bugger…"

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! I was more thinking of Sexy Chick, but whatever. **_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Riiiiiight…**_

Tristan: IDON'TBELIEVEYOU!

_**It was Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt, lol. Only that dastardly foursome of Disney, Michael Bay, Seltzerberg, and It's A Laugh Productions could totally mess up Zorc and Pals.**_

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS! Well, I mostly just come up with things that sound like something that Marik would sing (By the way, Bakura is offended by you calling him an idiot.). And have a free cookie; you guessed correctly! How did you find that out?**_

_ "Well… I think that we should wear them out with the bloody fangirls, and once they leave, let the stabbing commence! (insane laughter)"_

_ "_(Marik with disheveled hair arrives, but Bakura has taken over) Hello, _hikari_. Seems like you've finally lost it."

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! I wonder, too. I'll see what I could do to have Shadi appear. BTW, how's the TV Tropes page going? Let me know when it's ready!**_

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! Yes, yes he does.**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! What was informative? And Marik bought them at a generic cosplay store.**_

_**Waterlillyx 2: THANKS! No. No she didn't. Ooh, a goldmine! That makes my heart feel super happy! Don't worry, he'll appear.**_

_**LightxLyaoi: THANKS! (hands a free cookie) They were actually doing the whole transformation!**_

FLY AWAY NOW! FLY AWAY NOW! FLY AWAAAAAAAAAAY-

"Will you bloody shut up?"

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Fangirl Ghost: You are too late, for your precious Bakura is under my control! Now, Mind Slave… attack that spoiled brat of a fangirl!

Bakura: (pins Angelucie to the wall.) Any last words?

Marik: NOT IF I COULD HELP IT! (throws knife, which catches Bakura's trenchcoat and pins it to a wall)

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Zoisite and Kunzite are owned by Naoko Takeuchi. Various candies are owned by their various companies. Fluttershy and Applejack are owned by Hasbro and Lauren Faust.**_

Marik had came over to Bakura's that morning to help prepare for Number 101. He soon came in, carrying the most expensive things at Target.

Bakura knew that Marik had arrived when Marik was slamming his fists against the door, screaming, "LET ME IN!" Bakura opened the door to find Marik dressed as Zoisite from Sailor Moon for Halloween. Marik yelled, "BAKURA! I'm surprised at you! It's Halloween, and you're not dressed up as anyone!"

Bakura irritatedly remarked, "Remember my bloody costumephobia?"

Marik walked in, plopping himself on the couch, and the two got to work on changing the receipt information. When they were done with that, Marik said, "Fluffy, I'm feeling unhappy about how I'm in costume and you aren't. Conveniently, I brought another costume… Fluffy?"

Soon, Marik was dragging Bakura to the bedroom, with Bakura clawing at the floor, trying to get away from the Egyptian who was trying to force him into cosplay.

Marik yelled, "Will you stop your friggin' squirming? I'm trying to get you ready!" Finally, they made it to the bedroom. Marik tossed Bakura in there, and closed the door behind him.

Soon, Marik resurfaced, and called, "OK, Kitty! You can come out now!"

Bakura came out of the room, in the costume of Kunzite (also from Sailor Moon). Also, being the narrator, I should point out that Marik was somehow able to brush Bakura's hair, causing it to now look more like Ryou's (and the Sailor Moon character we had just mentioned).

Bakura yelled, "Marik, get me out of this costume right now."

Marik responded happily, "TOO LATE! We're going to Target!"

At Target, Bakura pulled out the list, and read, "Number 100: Grab heavy but not too heavy objects, and see who can throw them the most aisles over." Soon, the duo grabbed a couple of tricycles, and threw them several aisles over.

Duke Devlin was not able to dodge a Barbie tricycle being thrown onto him. He noted (with theme music), "This is soooo not going to help my image."

Bakura crossed off Number 100, and read, "Number 101: Buy expensive stuff, go home and use white-out and a pen to change the price to something much lower, and the total much higher, then return and demand a refund. We already did half of this step, so we should try to bloody finish it."

As Marik went to complain, a group of girls surrounded Bakura. One of them said, "Oh. My. Gawd. He is like, sooo cute!" And with that, the girls started to glomp Bakura.

When Marik came back with a huge wad of cash, he saw the girls glomping Bakura. Marik yelled, "HEY! Get off of my-" Suddenly, Marik recognized one of the girls. "Aren't you that Mary-Sue girl who attacked me at Comic Con?"

Mary-Sue looked up, and an air of awkwardness entered the room. Mary-Sue said, "Oh. My. Gawd. Girls, we're getting out of here!" And with that, the girls left.

Bakura angrily grumbled, "If you hadn't shown up, I could've sent them all to the bloody Shadow Realm."

Marik laughed at the idea. Bakura rolled his eyes, and crossed off Number 101. Then, he read, "Number 102: Get a cardboard box, go in the store, and pop out of the box and give out candy to passerby."

Soon, Marik had a cardboard box. Serenity, dressed as Fluttershy, and Joey, dressed as Applejack, came over. Serenity said, "Joey, that box is-"

"TRICK OR TREAT!" Marik popped out of the box. Serenity fainted from sheer terror, and Joey said, "What's da meaning of dis?"

Marik made a puppy dog face, and replied, "But it's Halloween! FRIGGIN' HALLOWEEN!"

Joey crossed his arms. "Halloween's tomorrow. Today's da big Halloween party!"

Marik awkwardly went back to Bakura, and said, "Fluffy, it turns out that **EFF!**ing Halloween is tomorrow, not today! So, we're going to dress up again tomorrow."

Bakura growled angrily. Suddenly, a man in a turban appeared, and greeted, "_Jagshamesh!_ My name is Shadi!"

Marik whispered to Bakura, "Oh frig. It's _this_ guy."

Shadi continued by warning, "Do not go near the shadowy lady in pink, or else you shall-"

Marik yelled, "THAT ALREADY HAPPENED!" 

"And?"

Bakura blankly stated, "We already bloody destroyed her."

"You WHAT?" Shadi looked around in confusion, and disappeared.

Bakura told Marik, "Marik, just walk away. Slowly." They did that, eventually returning to the Marikmobile. 

Marik then started to pet Bakura again, causing the latter to start purring. Eventually, Bakura smacked Marik's hand away, his hair now returning to normal.

Bakura then grabbed Marik's hand, and growled, "Don't bloody push me."

Marik pulled his hand away, and just continued to stare out the window.

_**Ladies and gents, this was the Halloween Special… of complete idiocy, strangeness, and other stuff. I think that I could've thought this out better… **_


	36. In Which The Owner Gets Involved

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to do whatever the hell you want with this list. Now for the comments (AND ZOMG! WE'VE GOT MORE REVIEWS THAN CENSORED TOWN!)**_

_**Phil the Persona Guy (Formerly SuperSayinLv9000): THANKS!**_

"You wouldn't like me when I'm bloody angry."

HOLY FRIG! Run for the **EFF!**ing hills!

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS!**_

I just realized that Serenity and Joey were also friggin' early!

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! True… What do you mean by Groundhog's Day Esque? And how's the page, btw?**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

"…Why?"

Oh, he looked very friggin' hot.

"Marik, what did you just say?"

MEEP! I said 'Meep!'

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! **_

Tristan: I WON'T BE SILENCED!

_**Yes. Yes it is.**_

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! Doobedoobedooba, PERRY!**_

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! My friend came up with that.**_

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! I'm thinking of making a full version of You Make Me Feel later.**_

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS! Are you sure? **_

(Melvin takes control of Marik's legs, Bakura takes control of Marik's arms, and Marik keeps control of his head.)

'Marvinkura': RUN AWAY! (Voice is basically Marik's, with Melvin's echoing, and some slight Bakura.)

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! Injury isn't funny.**_

_**OtEpShAmAyA: THANKS! Yes, MST seems to be quite popular.**_

_**Squarepotatoes: THANKS! For me getting 300 reviews, have a cookie. (And BTW, the anime was Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt)**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! Someone's going to get glomped at some point.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! And not to get nitpicky, but 'yu' is spelled y-o-u, not y-u.**_

"Purr…"

_**The anime was Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt.**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Fangirl Ghost: Dartz, we may be a step ahead; I still have partial control of Bakura.

Meanwhile…

Marik: Fluffy! It's good to have you back!

Bakura: Urge for bloodshed rising…

Marik: OH BAKURA! You're so friggin' hilarious!

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! No, it was Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt. I don't remember them turning clothing into weapons, wearing frilly dresses, or transforming to Fly Away Now in Bleach, but everyone has their own experiences with it lol. I was going to make the reference later, but I decided to make it then so I wouldn't forget. Sure; I want to know what happens with Ryou!**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Be nice to that Yami of yours, mmkays?**_

Ryou: (in a corner, crying)

Marik: YOU HEARTLESS MONSTER! You made the poor little limey cry! And what's so friggin' sexy about Melvin? HE WANTS TO FRIGGIN' KILL PEOPLE! Also, my friggin' middle name is SEBASTIAN! Marik SEBASTIAN Ishtar! And Melvin's his first name!

_**VampiressBeauty20: THANKS!**_

HOLY FRIG! (steals Pixie Stick and eats it)

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! I knew that.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Today Is Gonna Be A Great Day is owned by Bowling For Soup. Nemo is owned by Pixar. Disaster Movie is owned by Seltzerberg. Transformers is owned by Hasbro. Revenge of the Fallen (Transformers 2) is owned by Michael Bay. A Whole New World is owned by Disney. Baby One More Time is owned by Britney Spears.**_

Opening Theme:

_This could possibly be the best day ever, _

_And the forecast says that tomorrow will likely be a million and six times better, _

_So make every minute count jump up, jump in and seize the day, _

_And let's make sure that in every single possible way, _

_Today Is Gonna Be A Great Day! _

"Number 103: Find the fish section and when someone walks by begin to pet the fish tank and say, 'I know how you feel…'"

Despite the search of the whole store, not a fish tank was in sight. Marik got an idea that saved the Fanfic. "How about we go to that new pet store?"

The duo left Target, and got into the Marikmobile. The car was started… and parked right across the street, in front of the new pet store. 

Bakura asked, "Why didn't we just bloody walk?"

Marik replied, "Hello, comedy here!"

_Ba-dum CHING!_

Bakura whirled around, in order to look for where the 'Ba-dum CHING!' noise came from. Marik snickered, and soon found a fish. This fish was a clownfish, and looked exactly like Nemo from that one Pixar movie.

"Well, you're just the cutest thing!" Marik stared at it through the fish tank, and announced, "From now, your name is Mr. Bubbles! And you shall be a very, very evil fish indeed!"

Poor Mr. Bubbles just swam around aimlessly, not knowing who the heck was that crazy guy poking at him through the tank.

Suddenly, Bakura came over, causing Mr. Bubbles to hide behind a plastic castle. Marik took notice, and asked, "What's-" When Marik saw what had caused the fish to hide, he said, "Did that big bad kitty scare you?"

Bakura crossed his arms, and stated, "Marik, you are bloody delusional."

Marik ignored Bakura, and started petting him, saying, "See, Mr. Bubbles? He's friggin' harmless!"

Soon, the duo got back into the Marikmobile, which drove across the street and back to Target. They re-entered, with Bakura drawing out the list again, and reading, "Number 104: Spill water on the floor, and run around claiming that the store is flooded."

Frank was restocking the shelves, when Marik ran up to him, and yelled, "IT'S A FRIGGIN' EMERGENCY! THE FRIGGIN' STORE IS FRIGGIN' FLOODING! In a few hours, we will all **EFF!**ing die!"

Tristan yelled from another aisle, "I thought that in a few hours, the sun will rise!"

_Soon…_

Bill angrily looked at the 'flood'. The 'flood' in question was nothing more than a small puddle of water.

Bill muttered, "I'm surprised that I haven't fired this idiot yet," and walked off to do things that managers did. Bakura came back, crossed off Number 104, and read, "Number 105: As the cashier runs your purchase over the scanner say "BEEP" in a loud voice. Repeat this for every item, and for other customer's items."

Soon, Marik hid behind the cash register, and listened as Cathy rang up Yami's purchase. When she ran the packs and packs of children's card games over the scanner, Marik yelled, "BLEEP!" Eventually, Yami looked over to see Marik sitting near Cathy's feet. Yami rolled his eyes, and boomed:

_**MIND CRUSH!**_

When Bakura found Marik, he groaned, picked up the unconscious body, and carried it back to the Marikmobile.

_**Meanwhile…**_

_Bill the Manager in his office!_

The owner of Target sat in the chair across from Bill. He said, "I heard that this branch has been having… trouble."

"Yes sir," Bill responded, projecting some stock footage. "Two pranksters have been messing around in our lovely store. I plan to make an end to this, though."

The owner continued, "I'd like to see who these… pranksters are."

Bill brought down a screen, with a picture of Marik on it. "This is one of them. From what I've seen, she's not particularly bright. The last time I had contact with her, she and my ex-wife had broken into my office."

From across the room, a voice said, "Siiiiiir, thaaaaaaat's noooooot aaaaaaa giiiiiiirl-"

"SHUT UP, FRANK!"

Frank shambled out of the room. Bill continued, by clicking a remote that changed the picture to one of Bakura. "Now, this one's smarter. He seems to be in charge of this operation. But it's a ruse, I tell you."

The owner stroked his chin thoughtfully. "And why do you say that?"

Bill yelled, "I'm telling you, he's _BLEEP!_ing insane! He tried to _BLEEP!_ing murder me before! Murder, I tell you! MURDER!"

"Bill, calm down," the owner said. There was silence. A few minutes later, he asked, "So, what do you plan to do about it?"

Bill grinned. "Something that should have been done a long, long time ago.

_**And now for the stinger!**_

Disney Pictures presents, along with the men that brought you Transformers 2 and Disaster Movie, a new musical!

_Zorc:_

_**I can destroy the world;**_

_**Total annihilation…**_

This tells the story of a monster named Zorc, whose master plan is to…

_Zorc boomed, "DESTROY THE WORLD!"_

However, there's only one problem:

_The mysterious figure (some combination of Shadi and Ishizu) said, "If you want to destroy the world, you must find the 7 Millennium Items. You already have two, but to find the other five is dangerous."_

With new and exciting characters…

_ "I AM MARIK ISHTAR!"_

_ Bakura said, "I already bloody knew that. Wait a bloody moment, that's not a new character!"_

Enchanting songs…

_Zorc:_

_**It's time to remember the chaos,**_

_**From the days of ancient times…**_

And the theme song remixed for the kids to enjoy…

_(Insert a horribly auto-tuned Disney Pop version of the Zorc and Pals theme with a rap verse here.)_

This movie is guaranteed to be fun for the entire family!

_ Yami boomed, "I won't let evildoers take my beloved Millennium Puzzle!"_

_ Bakura crossed his arms. "You think so?"_

Starring your favorite Disney Stars!

_(Insert voice acting montage of Disney Stars here.)_

It's ZORC AND PALS! Coming February 30th to a theater near you!

_**Meanwhile, at the pet store…**_

Marik (to Mr. Bubbles):

_My loneliness is killing me,_

_(And I)_

_I must confess I still believe,_

_When I'm not with you I lose my mind,_

_Give me a sign:_

_Hit me baby one more time_!

_** The second stinger idea is credited to my good friend. And yes, I based the format loosely off LK's, with the theme song and stinger. So, vote, and tune in next time, when… CRAP! DON'T HUG ME, MELVIN!**_


	37. In Which They Get Arrested

_** I do not own this list. You all have my permission to do stuff with this. (And no, not like **__**that**__**.) Now for the comments.**_

_**TurboDuel: THANKS!**_

"CARD GAMES IN TARGET, YUSEI!"

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! If I were in Card Games: The Musical, I would so want to play Marik. Or Tea. Or… well anyone. But I want to be Marik, because I think that I'm good at his voice.**_

_**MyFalseTruth: THANKS! I thought that people would.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! Spell-check. It is good. You're welcome!**_

"(bites hand)"

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! I read the 'I smell an Oscar' part in Joey's voice. ClownFishFTW! Judging from the fact that one of the conspirators is FRICKIN' SELTZERBURG OF EPIC (fail) MOVIE, I wouldn't see it either.**_

Bill: (in bush with binoculars) No-

Marik: (girly screams) BAKURA! There's a weird guy watching me!

Bakura: (goes outside, punches Bill, and walks away)

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! I can't decide, either.**_

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! Okay… how are we doing on it now? How much have we finished? And what are some tropes that have been covered? PWEASE? Also, there's two examples of Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking in these chapters.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

HEY! I just got my friggin' hair done!

_**Angelucie: THANKS!  
><strong>_

Fangirl Ghost: Hehehe… now, to turn Marik to my side as well!

_**Meanwhile…**_

Marik: Oh, what a great day! I sure hope that something doesn't – (is teleported away)

_**DOUBLE FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE! (Meanwhile…)**_

Marik: (teleports in) Where am – (sees Dartz and the Fangirl Ghost) What the frig do you want?

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! I guessed that.**_

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! I'll work on that Yusei and Jack chapter.**_

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS!**_

Panty and Stocking: (teleport in)

_FLY AWAY NOW!  
>FLY AWAY NOW!<br>FLY AWAAAAAY!_

Panty/Stocking: (to Ryou)

_Oh wicked spirit, born of a lost soul in limbo, _

_Receive judgement from the garments of the Holy Virgin,_

_Cleansed of worldly impurities,_

_Return to heaven from Earth!_

_REPENT!_

(They teleport out)

Ryou: (snaps out of insanity) What happened?

Marvinkura: (runs away)

_**PakichuNoriwa: THANKS! **_

(hisses) I still want to know what the frig I did!

_**WELCOME BACK!**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Today Is Gonna Be A Great Day is owned by Bowling For Soup. The Doofenshmirtz Jingle and Busted are owned by Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh. I do not own 4Kids. The second stinger idea is owned by TomSka.**_

Opening Theme:

_This could possibly be the best day ever,_

_And the forecast says that tomorrow will likely be a million and six times better,_

_So make every minute count jump up, jump in and seize the day,_

_And let's make sure that in every single possible way,_

_Today Is Gonna Be A Great Day!_

Bakura ran around Target, looking for Marik. The Marikmobile had not arrived that morning, forcing Bakura to walk several blocks to Target. Everyone's favorite bishounen kitty was ready to strangle someone, when he happened to run into Melvin.

"Oh god, it's you," Bakura groaned, "What the hell do you want?"

Melvin crossed his arms. "Don't waste my time today, _Florence_. I'm in a terrible mood."

Bakura was just about to ask what put Melvin in this mood, when flashback lines appeared.

_~FLASHBACK!~_

_The 4Kids employee told Melvin, "I'm sorry, but we needed to!"_

_ Melvin yelled, "WHAT THE FRIG? But I got the series cancelled just like you asked!"_

_ The 4Kids employee responded, "I know, and you were heavily rewarded for that. But unfortunately, the economic crisis is not getting any better. So, I'm sorry, but we're going to have to say goodbye."_

_ At this point, Melvin jumped onto the employee, and was forcibly escorted out the door by Nesbitt and Lector._

_~FLASHBACK!~_

Bakura responded by saying, "So let me get this straight: 4Kids fired you."

"Yup."

"And you tried to murder the bloody employee."

"Were you even watching the **EFF!**ing flashback, Binky Boy?"

Bakura sighed, pulled out the list, and read, "Number 106: Scream really loudly. When someone tells you to be quiet, scream, 'I will not be silenced!'"

Melvin walked into the center of the store, and started screaming. Yami walked over, and yelled, "Excuse me, but-"

"I WILL NOT BE SILENCED!" And with that, Melvin ran off. Bakura crossed off the step, and read, "Number 107: Hold a bag of frozen veggies over your head, and yell 'Fear me, and my evil army of frozen carrots!'"

Suddenly, after a few minutes, Melvin came out, and yelled, "ATTENTION! I, your new evil ruler, have taken over this store! FEAR ME, AND MY EVIL ARMY OF FROZEN CARROT MIND SLAVES!" And then, Melvin started tossing bags of carrots at everyone. One hit Tristan straight in the face, and as he fell unconscious, he said, "I like pudding!"

Bakura couldn't help but snicker a teensy bit, and read, "Number 108: Hug someone randomly and say, 'I love you, mommy!'"

Melvin snuck up behind another employee, pulled out the Rod, and jumped onto him, yelling, "I LOVE YOU-"

_**MIND CRUSH!**_

Melvin crashed to the ground, turning back into Marik. Yami and Ashley picked up the body, and carried it away.

_**Meanwhile…**_

Bakura was wondering where Melvin went, when a hand covered his eyes, and another grabbed his hands. Joey's voice whispered, "Don't move, kitty."

_**Soon…**_

_Bill the Manager in his office!_

Marik woke up seated in a chair next to Bakura. Across from them was Bill, seated in his chair, and Bert, the owner of Target.

"Well then," Bill triumphantly declared, "How does it feel for you two to know that you two are busted?

_BUSTED!_

"I don't know what you bloody mean," Bakura growled, his voice slightly shaking.

Bill whistled, and a policewoman appeared behind the two. She asked, "Are these the two hooligans?"

Bert nodded. The woman handcuffed Marik, saying, "You are under arrest for disturbance of peace, recklessness, and having the most annoying voice in the world."

Marik cried, "But I'm too sexy for jail!" He followed that with, "And my singing voice is very beautiful, thank you very much!"

The policewoman ignored him, and handcuffed Bakura, saying, "And you are under arrest for disturbance of peace, recklessness, and for having too many fangirls."

Bakura hissed, causing the policewoman to recoil. Bill whispered, "I told you he's insane!"

The policewoman led them out of the room. Behind a door, Joey fist pumped, and Yami frowned. Now he had no more reasons to go to Target.

_**And now for the stinger! (**__**The first one is important to the so-called plot, so it's important for you to read it**__**.)**_

Yusei and Jack were relaxing in the hotel room, when suddenly, Akiza walked in, and said, "We've got a letter!"

"Let me see that," said Yusei as he grabbed the letter, and read:

"_Dear Yusei and Jack,_

_ Enclosed is a list known as the 333 Ways to Get Kicked Out Of Target. My brother and his friend were both arrested, and I need you to do steps 109 – 111 while I bail them out. I'm predicting that you two will be very successful.  
><em>

_ Yours truly,_

_ Ishizu Ishtar_

_P.S. This is definitely not a Xanatos Gambit to stop the (burnt hole covering spoilers here) that definitely does not exist from manifesting itself._

_P.P.S. I definitely did not just burn a hole into crucial pieces of info that are definitely not crucial to cover up spoilers."_

Jack yelled, "LET'S DO THE LIST, YUSEI!"

Yusei nodded, and said, "Jack, I know what we're going to do tomorrow."

_**(LINE BREAK)**_

Marik yelled, "There's something on your face!"

Yami turned around, and just as he was about to ask what Marik meant, the latter punched Yami in the face. Marik triumphantly shrieked, "IT WAS PAIN!"

_** Ladies and gentlemen, it's a dark, dark time. Come next time, when Jack and Yusei do the list, and Marik and Bakura sing songs from Disney's Tangled with other criminals. And no, it's not the end. Now, if you excuse me, I'm going to hide from the angered reviewers. I'm sure you wouldn't be happy about the events that just transpired. No seriously, I'm sure.**_


	38. In Which Yusei Vents To Stuffed Animals

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to do things. Now, read the comment replies (and the rest of the story) while I wait for the Bonds Beyond Time Abridged to get posted by LK.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT WAS THE SONG I WAS GOING TO DO?**_

_**PhilThePersonaGuy: THANKS! It shall never, never end.**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS!**_

Yami: Um… thank you.

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Because. I wanted to reference Tangled. **_

Ryou: I thought you hated me now. :(

Melvin: (hugs) Why can't I hug you properly?

_**Squarepotatoes: THANKS! Screw being assaulted, I thought that Bakura was going to get something even worse! O _ o**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS!**_

"(Hisses and starts clawing) You can't stop me!"

QUICK! Somebody get the straightjacket! He's on another rampage!

_**Angelucie: THANKS!  
><strong>_

Bakura: (throws knife at the glue, cutting him and Angelucie apart)

Ishizu: Oh no.

Sailorblaze: ?

Ishizu: We are all going to be killed. I predict so.

Bakura: (pinning down Angelucie and snarling)

_**Meanwhile…**_

F.G.: He's ready.

Dartz: Are we gonna due him?

F.G.: No, you fool, we're going to turn him to our side. And Bakura, too.

_**Oh noes… what happens next?**_

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS!**_

Stocking: It's explicitly stated in our contracts that we have to protect any Yu-Gi-Oh character in danger of getting murdered. (Disappears again)

"No, not really."

_**Raspberry 14: THANKS! So do I. Just replace 'Bakura' with 'Marik'. **_

_**TurboDuel: THANKS!**_

Jack: FANFICTION ON MOTORCYCLES, YUSEI!

_**VampiressBeauty20: THANKS! **_

Marik: Curbstomp Bill! And where's Fluffy?

(cuts to Bakura in a jail cell while being tied up and gagged)

Marik: Ok, that's a little too much information.

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! And thanks for reviewing my Softshipping oneshot. :)**_

_**YamiXAshley: THANKS! She may appear…**_

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS!**_

"Hello. If you didn't notice by now, we're in a bloody jail cell."

He had it coming! He had it coming! He only had himself to blame-

"Marik, will you stop singing Cell Block Tango? It's getting on my bloody nerves!"

_** That's actually a very accurate description of Marik…**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Don't worry, they'll definitely appear. I'll add in Jailhouse Rock for one of the stingers. Can I come with you, Phoenix?**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. I've Got A Dream is owned by Disney. Today Is Gonna Be A Great Day is owned by Bowling for Soup. Jailhouse Rock is owned by Elvis Presley. Ryou's special message is owned by DIC and SEGA. 'Screw Gravity' is owned by TomSka.**_

Marik: (plays parody of the theme song on guitar)

_This could possibly be the worst day ever,_

_We got arrested for trying to make it a million and six times better,_

_Tried to make every minute count, we want out so we could seize the day,_

_And make sure that in every single possible way,_

_Tomorrow Will Be A Great Day – _Hey, give me my **EFF!**ing guitar back!

_**Meanwhile…**_

Yusei parked his motorcycle, and went to meet up with Jack. When Yusei finally found him, Jack yelled, "WE GOT A LIST, YUSEI!"

Yusei took a look at the list, and read, "Number 109: Go in the undergarments section, and ask random people if they think this will fit. Well, Jack, we should get this over with."

Soon, Yusei went up to Mai, held up a pair of undergarments, and asked, "Do you think this will fit?"

Mai grabbed them, and replied, "Thank you!" She went back to her cart, leaving behind a very, very stunned Yusei.

_**Meanwhile in Jail…**_

"You know, Fluffy," Marik told Bakura, "There's only one thing wrong with this… I hate these uniforms. They are not sufficiently sexy enough!"

Bakura rolled his eyes as they walked into the jail cafeteria, passing by a man with blue hair, a woman with purple hair, and their beige cat. Soon, they sat with another man.

Marik banged the table. "Excuse me," he yelled, "But I would like to know about some fun activities to do here!"

The man shrugged, and said, "Well, not much. We just have to wait."

"For what?"

"Something."

Marik felt a bit frustrated. "Don't you have hobbies? Friday Night Movies?" After a while, he asked, "Do you even have dream?"

The man seemed to disappear into another world. Thoughtfully, he wondered aloud, "Dreams…" Then, he did something that made Bakura cringe: He broke into song.

_I'm malicious, mean and scary,_

_My sneer could curdle dairy,_

_And violence-wise, my hands are not the cleanest._

_But despite my evil look,_

_My temper and hatred of books,_

_I've always yearned to be a concert pianist!_

Marik was really interested. "Ooh, tell me more!"

_Can't you see me on the stage performin' Mozart,_

_Ticklin' the ivories 'til they gleam?_

_Yep, I'd rather be called deadly,_

_For my killer show tune medley,_

_Thank you, 'cause way down deep inside I've got a dream!_

_I've got a dream,_

_I've got a dream!_

_See, I ain't as cruel and vicious as I seem!_

_Though I do like breaking femurs,_

_You can count me with the dreamers!_

_Like everybody else, I've got a dream!_

Suddenly, another man came over, and joined in the singing. Bakura groaned, and slammed his head against the table. Marik, however, eagerly sat up and hummed along.

_I've got scars and lumps and bruises,_

_Plus something here that oozes,_

_And let's not even mention my complexion._

_But despite my extra toes,_

_And my goiter and my nose,_

_I really wanna make a love connection!_

_Can't you see me with a special little lady?_

_Rowin' in a rowboat down the stream?_

_Though I'm one disgusting blighter,_

_I'm a lover, not a fighter!_

_'Cause way down deep inside, I've got a dream!_

Suddenly, everyone else started to sing and dance. Well, everyone except for Bakura, who muttered, "We had to go to the prison with the singing criminals, did we?"

"YES!"

_I've got a dream!_

_(_Chorus: _He's got a dream)_

_I've got a dream!_

_(_Chorus: _He's got a dream)_

_And I know one day, romance will reign supreme!_

_Though my face leaves people screaming,_

_There's a child behind it, dreaming!_

_Like everybody else, I've got a dream!_

_**Meanwhile…**_

"Well, that was awkward," Yusei noted, as he crossed off the Number 109. Then, he read, "Number 110: Tie a plushie to one end of a string your ankle to the other end, and run around screaming, 'HELP! IT'S AFTER ME!'

Jack tied a purple elephant to his ankle, and started running, and while he ran, he yelled, "HELP! THERE'S AN ELEPHANT TRYING TO KILL ME!"

Soon, Jack passed by Yami, Ashley, Joey, and another girl named Rose. Rose asked, "Pharaoh, shouldn't you mind crush him?"

Yami shrugged. "He's not of importance to me."

_**Meanwhile at Jail…**_

The man grabbed Marik and Bakura's hands, and started to introduce them to the other members.

"Dave would like to quit and be a florist," he said, pointing to a man watering the flowers, "And Gunther does interior design!" This time, he pointed to a man measuring the room. "Steve is into mime, and his cupcakes are sublime!"

Marik waved to his former mind slave, shouting, "Hello, Steve!"

Their host continued, "Joseph knits, Manfred sews, Bobby does little puppet shows…" Finally, they got to another man playing with figures of unicorns. He finished with, "And Vladimir collects ceramic unicorns!"

Bakura grimaced. Here he was, locked in a jail with a whole army of Marik clones. Hopefully, someone would arrive with the bail soon.

_**Meanwhile…**_

Yusei crossed off Number 110, and read, "Number 111: Start yelling at the stuffed animals when there are people around."

Yusei got to a stand with a whole load of stuffed animals. Then, he yelled to one, "You know what? I've had it. First off, I had to save the world with an egotistical nutcase claiming to be a Pharaoh, along with rapper. Then, I have a strange girl who's trying to break me up from my wonderful motorcycle. And finally, I have an idiot following me who won't shut up about card games on motorcycles!"

Yusei, feeling satisfied, went back to Jack, and crossing off 111, told him, "Well, there's one last thing that this Ishizu person wanted us to do…"

_**Meanwhile in Jail…**_

The singer laughed, and walking to Bakura, asked him, "So, pretty boy… what's YOUR dream?"

Bakura whispered to Marik, "He wants me to bloody sing, doesn't he?"

Marik scowled. "Look, Fluffy, why can't you just friggin' cooperate?"

Bakura sighed, and climbed onto a table. He said:

Bakura:

_I have dreams like you - no, really!_

_Just much less touchy-feely._

_They mainly happen somewhere warm and sunny,_

_On an island that I own,_

_Tanned and rested and alone,_

_Surrounded by enormous piles of money!_

Marik unenthusiastically climbed onto that table, and whispered, "Bakura, your dream is really, really, lame." Marik then sung:

Marik:

_I've got a dream!_

_(_Bakura: _He's got a dream)_

_I've got a dream!_

_(_Bakura: _He's got a dream)_

_I just wanna hear the Pharaoh's screams!_

_Yeah_

_And since I'm far from my doom,_

_I'm so glad I left that tomb,_

_Like all you lovely folks, I've got a dream!_

Suddenly, Marik grabbed Bakura, and they started dancing together, as everyone else started to sing:

_He's got a dream,_

_He's got a dream,_

_They've got a dream,_

_We've got a dream!_

_So our differences ain't really that extreme,_

_We're one big team…_

Marik:

_Call us brutal,_

_Sick,_

_Sadistic,_

_And grotesquely optimistic,_

_'Cause way down deep inside, we've got a dream!_

Others:

_I've got a dream!_

_I've got a dream!_

_I've got a dream!_

_I've got a dream!_

Bakura yelled, "I've got a bloody dream, ok?"

Marik:

_I've got a dream!_

(Almost) Everyone:

_Yes, way down deep inside, I've got a dream!_

_YEAH!_

Suddenly, two cops came in, and said, "We need a Mr. Marik Ishtar and a Mr. Yami Bakura."

Before they left, the man who had started the song told them, "Fulfill your dream."

Bakura responded, "Maybe."

The man frowned. "I was talking to your friend. Your dream stinks."

As they followed the officer, Marik lampshaded, "I told you so, Fluffy."

Suddenly, they were given back their normal clothes. The officer said, "Two friends of yours came to bail you guys out."

Marik cheered, "I knew that my evil council would stick out for me in the end!"

The officer gave a questioning look. Bakura told him, "He's just a bloody idiot."

Soon, they met up with Jack and Yusei outside. Marik glumly said, "Oh look, it's the people from 5Ds."

Bakura responded, "Aren't they the guys who say-"

Jack interrupted with, "CARD GAMES ON MOTORCYCLES!"

Everyone yelled back, "Jack, nobody cares!"

_**Now for the stingers!**_

Marik:

_The warden threw a party in the county jail,_

_The prison band was there and they began to wail,_

_The band was jumpin' and the joint began to swing,_

_You should've heard those knocked out jailbirds sing!_

_Let's rock!_

_Everybody, let's rock!_

_Everybody in the whole cellblock,_

_Was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock!_

_Number 47 said to number 3,_

_"You're the cutest jailbird I ever did see._

_I sure would be delighted with your company,_

_Come on and do the Jailhouse Rock with me!"_

_Let's rock!_

_Everybody, let's rock!_

_Everybody in the whole cellblock,_

_Was dancin' to the Jailhouse Rock, Rock, Rock!_

_**And now for a special message from Ryou Bakura…**_

Ryou said, "There's nothing greater than getting a hug from your best friend. But if a certain someone who I shall not bloody mention tries to hug you in a way that can be life threatening, that isn't good! It's your lifespan, and you shouldn't let yourself get stabbed."

"There's three things that you can do," Ryou continued, "First, you have to yell, 'No!' Then, you have to get the bloody hell out of there. And finally, you need to tell someone who can keep that someone in line, like the Pharaoh. That's all I have to say. Now, I need to go run away from Melvin."

_**(LINE BREAK)**_

Kaiba and Yugi were both waiting for the bus. However, it seemed as if the bus was not coming. After a while, Yugi said, "It sure would be nice to fly. Unfortunately, there's that annoying limitation of gravity-"

Kaiba rolled his eyes, and yelled, "Screw gravity!" And suddenly, he rose into the air, and flew off to KaibaCorp, leaving a stunned Yugi behind.

_** So, yeah. This is the new chapter. Trust me, when I first saw that ASDF sketch, I immediately thought of Kaiba. Tune in next time, when something**_ _**normal actually happens.**_


	39. In Which Crazy Stuff Happens

_** I saw the Bonds Beyond Time Abridged Movie… IT WAS FRICKIN' AWESOME DUDETTES!**_

_**I don't own this list. You all have my permission to do whatever the hell you want with this list. Now for the comments!**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS!**_

Ryou: I'm saying it because you like Melvin more than me!

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

"(growls and bites Luna)"

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! (comes along) It wasn't a ton of Marik duplicates; it was just a bunch of people who acted like Marik. And of course Kaiba can fly!**_

_**Seabreeze27: THANKS! I know two 5D's fans. In fact, they were the ones who reintroduced me to Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged!**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! I thought that he would. :)**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS!**_

HOLY FRIG! Why does Bakura being bound like this turn me on?

_**PhilThePersonaGuy: THANKS! I'm thinking of having them sing 'Moves Like Jagger' later.**_

"What medication?"

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS!  
><strong>_

"This thing is itchy!"

Oh, shush it Fluffy, I think that _you_ look hot!

"…What?"

MEEP!

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! The 'It Was Pain' thing?**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! **_

Holy frig! It's our friends from jail!

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS!**_

…No.

_**Shadowcharmerdemon: THANKS! You DO? What lines do you quote?**_

_**Anaile1012: THANKS! Wait until you read the later chapters.**_

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! I thought you would…**_

(insert singing duelists on motorcycles inside Target here)

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! How's the page going?**_

_**Squarepotatoes: THANKS! No, I afraid that this is reality!**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

F.G.: Heh… (pulls out real control rod) The rod from before was a fake made of delicious cheeses! Now, my little Mariku… (kisses Marik on cheek, his eyes dulling over) Go do what your lady tells you!

Marik: (laughs)

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Today Is Gonna Be A Great Day is owned by Bowling For Soup (Next chapter, it's getting changed!) Pampers Pull Ups are owned by Procter & Gamble. The Doofenshmirtz Jingle is owned by Dan Povenmire and Jeff 'Swampy' Marsh. Terror Time Again is owned by Skycycle.**_

Opening Theme:

_This could possibly be the best day ever, _

_And the forecast says that tomorrow will likely be a million and six times better, _

_So make every minute count jump up, jump in and seize the day, _

_And let's make sure that in every single possible way, _

_Today is Gonna to Be a Great Day! _

Bakura pulled out the list, and read, "Number 112: Grab some Pampers Pull-Ups, and while buying them yell at the clerk 'Mommy, guess what? I'm a big kid now!'"

Soon, Marik returned to Cathy the Cashier holding a package of diapers. He yelled, "Hey, guess what?"

Cathy blankly asked, "What?"

Marik waved the Pampers package, and yelled, "I'M A BIG KID NOW!" It even had the jingle playing in the background.

Cathy sighed, and muttered to herself, "I hate my job."

Marik returned to Bakura, who crossed off Number 112, and read, "Number 113: Go into the bedding department, and with cookies in your hand, lay on a bed. Then, pretend you're having a nightmare about cookies, and yell 'COOKIE! COOKIE! NOOOOOO!' Then start rolling around."

Soon, Marik climbed into a bed with a package of cookies, and fell asleep. Suddenly, he rolled around, yelling, "NO, MELVIN! Don't eat my cookies! Stop it! Don't eat my **EFF!**ing cookies! NO!"

Suddenly, he woke up, staring into Frank's face. Marik slapped Frank, and cried, "You watch me sleep? YOU FRIGGIN' WEIRDO!" Then, Marik stormed over to Bakura, snatched the list, and read, "Number 114: Make evil eyes at someone and start whispering, 'I'm the little girl from the well… I've been waiting…'" Marik look up at Bakura, and pointed out, "Fluffy, I can't help but notice that you've been making _me _do everything on this list these days…"

_**Meanwhile…**_

Joey was helping Yami do the grocery shopping for the day. In the cereal section, Joey got a box, and held it to Yami, saying, "Yug', we should get dese!"

Yami stared at the cereal box. In large letters, they said:

_Yugio's: They're YUGI-LICIOUS!_

Yami asked, "How in the name of Ra do people know what I taste like?"

Joey shrugged, and the two continued on their way. However, when they got into an aisle by themselves, loud footsteps sounded. Joey gulped, and looked around.

Suddenly, he saw Bakura walking towards them, his head bent in a way that would hide his face from the two good-doers.

Yami crossed his arms, and asked, "Seriously, Bakura. Just cut the crap and tell us what in the name of Ra is going on!"

Bakura looked up, hair covering most of his face, and said face in the most deranged expression you could think of. (Think Freddy Krueger; it was something similar to that expression) He whispered, "I'm the little kid from the well… I've been waiting for you…" Then Bakura started laughing insanely. And by insanely, the narrator means Melvin's laugh turned up by eleven.

Yami boomed, "SWEET JUMPING SARCOPHAGUSES OF OSIRIS!"

Joey yelled, "NYEH!" Then, he ran off, dragging Yami with him.

Marik came out from his hiding place, and snickered, "You really got them good, Fluffy!"

Bakura, expression changing back to normal, turned to Marik and asked, "What do you bloody mean?"

Marik's jubilant expression quickly snapped to one of shock. He turned to Bakura, and said, "Wait, that wasn't you? As in, the fluffy kitty you?"

Bakura tugged at the Ring, and responded, "At least I don't think so…"

_**Meanwhile…**_

_Bill The Manager in his office!_

Bill sat across from Kaiba, and told him, "Mr. Kaiba, I'm very interested in getting to work with you."

Kaiba angrily responded, "Listen! I don't know why you're playing this _BLEEP!_ing game with me. First, you get two people to knock me out, and steal my clothes. Then, you give away 51% of my company's stock to them. And now, you don't pay attention to the mass chaos that those idiots caused!"

Bill twiddled his thumbs, and told Kaiba, "Well, sir Kaiba, we're trying hard…"

Kaiba slammed the table, yelling, "Well, what you insist is 'hard' is not hard enough in my book! This needs to be 20% more effective!"

Bill pleaded, "But we could be allies!"

Kaiba responded with, "SCREW THE ALLIANCE! I have money!" As Kaiba turned to the door, he added, "And resources!" And as he left, he added, "And more money!"

Bill turned around. "Well, damn," he said, "Now what are we going to do?"

_**And now for a very important message from S.B.! THIS IS IMPORTANT! YOU MUST READ IT!**_

Hi, this is Sailor Blaze. I decided to ask you all a very important question: What are your thoughts on Fluffy's psycho side? This is totally in generality; so let me know in your reviews!

_**We now continue the stingers.**_

(Montage of Joey being on the receiving end of Bakura's attacks)

_And it's terror time again!_

_They've got you running through the night,_

_It's terror time again!_

_And you just might die of fright:_

_IT'S A TERRIFYING TIME!_

_**So guys, don't forget to vote, tell me your thoughts on the psycho side of Bakura, and keep on reading!**_


	40. In Which Yuma Is Totally Not Extreme

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to spread the news about this fanfic. And now for the comments!**_

_**MyFalseTruth: THANKS! Wow, it is?**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

F.G.: The rocket-powered fist was merely a setback!

Marik: Any last words before Bakura and I murder you in cold blood?

Bakura: Don't think you can stop us this time… We've got your kitty! 

B.L.K.: Meow?

_**No, the little kid from the well is Samara from The Ring.**_

_**Seabreeze27: THANKS! Wowzers, that's a cool phrase ya got there.**_

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS! Yes, but I couldn't think of a better title.**_

Melvin: Go away.

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Ba-Ba-Bakura Ba-Ba-BAKURA! Yeah, 'cause that's how (sunglasses) I roll. YEAH!**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS!**_

"(hisses and claws at Luna)"

_**Crazy Queen Of Games In Secret: THANKS! I want friends like them, too! Why do you love his psychotic side?**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! WATCH IT, YOU SHALL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED. We'll learn… oh honey, we'll learn…**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! I knew that Abridgies would geek out at the 'Yugio's' segment. **_

_**PhilThePersonaGuy: THANKS! Why?**_

"(hisses and claws at Shadow)"

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! YOU ARE CORRECT! That was a brief cameo from Jessie, James, and Meowth of Team Rocket! Why are they blocked?**_

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! Crap! Lo siento! Gomen nasai! Blame the damn list for that mix-up! Yeah, but Yugi doesn't yell Egyptian curses…**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! Ooh, why do you think that he's hot?**_

I think I need help with this! Why does he turn me on like that?

…

Why?

_**FangandIggyRule: THANKS! You've got it; I decided to take your idea into consideration: Yuma's going to appear!**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Kawaita Sakebi is owned by Fields of View. Poker Face is owned by Lady Gaga. Leather Shoes is owned by LittleKuriboh. McDonalds is owned by McDonald's Corporation. 'Hey Listen!' is owned by Nintendo. Make A Man Out Of You is owned by Disney.**_

_Kawaita sakebi ga! _

_Kujike souna mune ni tsukisasu, _

_Kimi wo sasotte sekai wo mitai na (Come Along With Me!)_

_Darenimo dasenai, kotae ga boku no naka ni aru _

_Kake hiki ga kagi _

_Todoke, Fly at higher game! _

When Bakura came over to Marik's place in preparation for another day at Target, Ishizu instead answered the door.

"Ishizu, I was expecting Marik," Bakura said firmly.

Ishizu's eyes darted around the room, and started twirling her fingers around. "Bakura, remember when I predicted that Marik would come down with Singaporitis?"

Bakura cocked his head. "No, why?"

Soon, Ishizu led him into Marik's bedroom, where Marik was sitting in it, coughing. "I'd advise not to get too close to him." She left the room, leaving the two villains alone.

Marik hoarsely whispered, "I'm sorry that we can't go to Target today, Fluffy."

Bakura leaned against the door, with his arms crossed. "Marik, if you need me to, I'll bloody go."

Marik smiled, and tucked himself in. Bakura smirked, and added in, "You know, you sound like a bloody girl when you have Singaporitis."

Bakura exited the room, followed by Marik's shrieks. Suddenly, he froze in terror. There, lounging on the couch, watching the TV, was Yuma Tsukumo.

Bakura turned to Ishizu, and yelled, "Ishizu! Why is this bloody idiot in this house?"

Ishizu told Bakura, "He's coming with you to Target today. Bakura started to laugh hysterically at Ishizu. In response, she frowned, and told him, "I'm being completely serious."

Bakura went to Yuma, and said, "Well, I guess that we should –" 

Yuma interrupted by yelling, "HEY! I HEARD THAT THIS LIST IS EXTREEEEEEEEME! IS IT? IT HAS TO BE EXTREEEEEEEME!"

Bakura groaned. Suddenly, he got an evil idea on how to rid himself of this pain at Target.

_**Soon…**_

Bakura took out the list, and read, "Number 115: Go to the cafeteria area and buy fries. Then stand by the door, and when people walk through, throw the fries above their head like they're getting married."

Yuma cheered, "OH YEAH! THAT SOUNDS EXTREEEEEEEEME!" He ran over to the McDonalds in the store, and bought packs upon packs of French Fries. Soon, he hid behind a shelf, and waited.

Soon, Yami strolled by, whistling 'Leather Shoes'. Yuma jumped out, threw the fries at Yami, yelling, "HEY! CHECK ME OUT! ISN'T THIS EXTREEEEEEEEME?"

Yami rolled his eyes, and walked away. Bakura smirked to himself as he crossed off the step. He then read, "Number 116: Look at people with wide eyes saying, 'I see dead people!'"

Yuma went over to Yami, poking him on the soldier, yelling, "HEY! HEY LISTEN! HEY LISTEN! HEY LISTEN!"

Yami turned around, and asked, "What?"

Yuma yelled, "I SEE DEAD PEOPLE!"

Somewhere off-screen, Astral indignantly yelled, "Yuma, that's not funny!"

Yami sighed. "Very nice. Can I continue my shopping?" And with that, he dragged his cart away.

Yuma went back to Bakura, who read, "Number 117: Get a tent (With holes, preferably) and tell people to come in your lair. When they do, chuck popcorn at them, and ask them who invited them in."

Soon, Yuma had climbed into a random tent, and when Yami passed by, screamed, "DUDE! COME INSIDE MY EXTREEEEEEME CLUBHOUSE!"

Somehow, Yami was pushed into the tent, where Yuma chucked popcorn at him, yelling, "GET OUT OF MY EXTREEEEEEME CLUBHOUSE!"

Yami immediately knew what to do: he raised his arm, and boomed:

_**MIND CRUSH!**_

When Bakura heard Yami's cry, he ran out of the store, looking back several times to make sure that the Pharaoh was not following him. Soon, he made it to the outside of the store, and caught his breath.

When Bakura looked up again, he saw Marik in front of him, dressed in a fuzzy purple bathrobe and matching bunny slippers. Marik hoarsely told Bakura, "I came to help you with the list."

Bakura was speechless. Finally, he spoke up. "Marik, you're a little too late for that."

Marik grimaced. Bakura said, "Marik, we should really get you home. Your sister will probably throw a bloody fit when she finds out that you snuck out."

Marik whined, "But Fluffy!"

Bakura crossed his arms. "Marik."

Marik seemed a bit reluctant, and started to follow Bakura back. As they went back, Bakura asked, "So, you walked all of the way to Target with Singaporitis?"

Marik hoarsely yelled, "Yes!"

Bakura smiled to himself. Suddenly, the Slenderman jumped out of nowhere, and asked, "Heeeeeey guuuuuys. Caaaan I joooooiiiiin yoooooouuuuu?"

Marik and Bakura both frowned at him. Finally, Marik asked, "Do you friggin' mind? You're ruining the moment."

_**And now for the stinger!**_

Bill:

_Let's get down to business,_

_To save our store!_

_Did you bring less results_

_When I asked for more?_

_You're the saddest bunch,_

_I ever met_

_But you can bet_

_Before we're through_

_Because I'll make a salesman_

_out of you!_

_** Be sure to vote, review, and send lots of get well cards to Marik! He truly needs them. (Make sure that they have Pinkie Pie on them, though.)**_


	41. In Which Jaden Nearly Gets Killed

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to spread the word about this (C'mon! We need LK to see this!). Now for the reviews.**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Don't worry, he shall. Marik will return to his rightful spot next chapter.**_

_**FangandIggyRule: THANKS! So do I. I'm happy you feel great! Well, we did have a Ghost Nappa cameo some chapters ago, but I'll see what I can do.**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! And judging by our review sessions, it doesn't seem to be going well at all. **_

HOLY FRIG! Pinkie Pie! 

_**Crazy Queen Of Games In Secret: THANKS! **_

HOLY FRIG – (cough wheeze) Friggin' Singaporitis. (hugs Pinkie Pies)

_**MillenniumMonkey23: THANKS! I love your fanfic, btw.**_

Pinkie Pie: May the parties be with you!

HOLY FRIG! It's my hero!

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! Oh, there you are, Angie. Where didja go? And how has it been ever since that little incident with Bakura's haircut and me in your reviews?**_

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS! (hugs Bloody Rabbit Alice and backs away. Slowly.)**_

_**PhilThePersonaGuy: THANKS! **_

"What in the bloody world are you talking about?"

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! I agree, Zexal is boring and not extreme. Oh, let's get down to business…**_

"(In the raspier voice) Don't. Touch. Me."

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! **_

"It was very evil indeed. Maybe I should victimize that annoying furry next. And Zorc can not fit inside."

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! Why don't you know if Psycho Bakura is hot?**_

I am extremely happy, yes!

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

F.G.: I WILL NEVER STOP! Now, go my mind slaves!

Sailorblaze: I has an idea! ANGELUCIE!

Angelucie: ?

(Both authoresses transform in Dark Magician Girl outfits to 'Fly Away Now')

_FLY AWAY NOW!_

_FLY AWAY NOW!_

_FLY AWAAAAAAY!_

_FLY AWAY NOW!_

_FLY AWAY NOW!_

_FLY AWAAAAAAY!_

Sailorblaze and Angelucie:

_Oh fangirling spirit, born of a fanatical soul in Mysterious Limbo Dimension 127,_

_Receive punishment from two authoresses,_

_Cleansed of fanatical impurities,_

_Return to wherever you went when you died from Earth!_

_LEAVE!_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! (Takes a snickerdoodle) Yum!**_

HOLY FRIG! (Hugs Pinkie Pie plushie)

_**Shadowcharmerdemon: THANKS! What is your favorite quote to quote? **_

_**William and Jack and Jake: THANKS! I would appreciate it if your reviews were a tad… longer.**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! Lol.**_

Spider! SPIDER! Bakura, get that thing away from me!

_**VampiressBeauty20: THANKS! No, Marik's sick because of Singaporitis, not the dreaded Mind Crush! HOLY CRAP, NOT TWILIGHT!**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Dragonball Z is owned by Akira Toriyama. Dragonball Z Abridged is owned by TeamFourStar. Kawaita Sakebi is owned by Fields of View. Cheetos are owned by Frito-Lay.**_

_Kawaita sakebi ga!_

_Kujike souna mune ni tsukisasu,_

_Kimi wo sasotte sekai wo mitai na (Come Along With Me!)_

_Darenimo dasenai, kotae ga boku no naka ni aru_

_Kake hiki ga kagi_

_Todoke, Fly at higher game!_

Bakura groaned, "Ok, since Marik is still sick, who is gullible enough to go to Target to do the next 3 steps?"

Zorc, who was sitting next to him, boomed, "I WILL!"

Bakura took one look at Zorc, and responded, "No. Zorc, you know very well that you won't be able to fit into the bloody store!"

Zorc sighed, stood up, and walked away. Bakura asked the narrator, "What about Melvin?"

The narrator responded, "Dude, Melvin and Marik are the exact same people. Thus, Melvin is also at home with Singaporitis."

"Well, that's just fantastic," Bakura grimaced. "Ishizu, do you have an idea?"

Ishizu thought, and then, she had an idea. "I know just the person," she told Bakura, and whistled. Suddenly, a boy whose hair looked exactly like a Kuriboh walked in.

Bakura asked, "Who the hell is he?"

The boy announced, "I'm Jaden Yuki, and I'm FLAWLESS!"

Bakura buried his head into his hands, and muttered, "This is just great."

When they got to Target, Bakura read, "Number 118: Ride around on those electric cars, and pretend that you're a prissy English Man. Say things like "Cheerio, good man." to people who walk by. And don't forget to have perfect posture."

Jaden said, "You should do that step."

Bakura laughed at Jaden's face for a few seconds. Then, his face became serious again, and he said, "No."

Soon, Jaden had parked right near Yami, and said, "'Ello, good man! How are we doing on this rather fine day?" (Apologies to British people everywhere, especially LittleKuriboh, Bakura, and anyone from England!)

Yami stared at Jaden with wide eyes, and said, "Okay, I'm going to back away… slowly…" And he did.

The car also passed by Vegeta and Nappa. Nappa yelled, "Ooh, Vegeta! Can we do what they're doing?"

Vegeta answered, "Nappa, we came here strictly for groceries!"

"It looks fun!"

Vegeta furiously responded, "Goddamn it, Nappa!"

Bakura came out, slapped Jaden, and yelled, "I sound nothing like that!" Then, he crossed off Number 118, and read, "Number 119: Chase your friends up and down aisles, trying to run over them with those electric cars. Make sure to tell your friends to act like they don't know you." Bakura took one look at the list. Then, he stared at Jaden, and flashed an extremely deranged smile.

Soon, Jaden was running up and down the aisles, being chased by Bakura. As he was being chased, he rapped:

_This is Jaden Yuki, and I'm running fast,_

_Because I want to be the one who's killed off last!_

_Some insane British guy is chasing me 'cause it seems,_

_He didn't like the way he was treated by me!_

_So, I just want to know before I get beat-os,_

_Who will come help me – Ooh, Cheetos!_

Jaden ran off to worship the delicious, fake cheese covered puffs. Bakura climbed out of the electric car, and said to himself, "That was easier than expected."

He walked to the front of the store, where a stranger whose face was obscured by a cowboy hat was riding on a horse electric ride. Suddenly, Mokuba came up, and asked, "Can I go on?"

The stranger turned to Mokuba, and yelled, "Excuse me? I got onto this friggin' ride first! There is no friggin' way you're going to boot me off!"

Mokuba ran over to Kaiba, and told him, "Big brother, that mean man won't let me –"

Kaiba turned to Mokuba, and interrupted him by saying, "Shut up, Mokuba!" Then, he dragged him away.

The stranger slid off the ride, went over to Bakura, and grabbed the list. He crossed off Number 120, and as he did that, read, "Number 120: Spend all your money riding on those little rides for toddlers. Fit the character; if you on a horse, then pretend that you're a cowboy, etc. And if a little kid comes over wanting to use it, start barking at them until they run away crying." The stranger then lifted his hat upwards to reveal his identity.

Bakura did not believe what was going on. "Marik?"

Marik, whose voice had obviously improved, responded, "The one and only!"

_**And now for the stinger!**_

_Bill the Manager's Evil Council!  
><em>

Bill stared at all of the people who had entered. He said, "I have gathered you all here today, because we all have a bone to pick with these pranksters. I would like each of you to come up and introduce yourselves."

Yami came up first, and introduced himself. "Hello," he started, "My name is Yami. I am here because those two have been a thorn in my side for way too long."

Joey followed him. "Da name's Joey. Joey Wheeler! I'm here because I want to see a certain kitty go down!"

Ashley followed. "I'm Ashley," she cried in delight, "And I'm here because Yami's here!"

Dartz followed. "I'm here 'cause Mah-rick Ishtar stole mah idea for havin' an evil council!"

After several others came up, Bill seated everyone, and announced, "Then, I can happily call this Evil Council to-"

Yami asked, "Why exactly are we 'evil'?"

Bill replied in frustration, "I don't know! It just sounded cool, okay?"

_**Ladies and gents… trouble's a-brewing. And before you asked, I came up with the Jaden rap. We can't have Jaden without one! Also, Kawaita Sakebi is the season 0 opening theme.**_


	42. In Which Odion Gets Stuck In Traffic

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to do stuff with this fic. First off: I am happy! I got another review for my oneshot 'Can You Feel The Love Tonight'! It's only my second one, though, possibly because Softshipping is not popular in Yu-Gi-Oh. (Sadness) But anyway, read it if you like, but here are the comments!**_

_**FangandIggyRule: THANKS! LK! I'm here, waiting for you! I don't have a YouTube or a Tumblr. If I did, it would be a blog in Marik's P.O.V.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! **_

"In your bloody dreams."

_** I know; Jaden without rapping is like grilled cheese without cheese. I know!**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! I wrote that rap from scratch. Me too, I never cared for GX that much. BTW, are you going to write any Softshipping fics or oneshots?**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS!**_

Marik: (cough cough) Arrogant! (Cough cough)

_**PhilThePersonaGuy: THANKS! **_

"So are you."

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Bakura: (raspier voice) SURPRISE!

Marik: Frig.

Mana: Oh crap!

Bakura: (laughs insanely in raspier voice)

_**This is NOT the work of the Fangirl Ghost.**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! I did; it's frickin' awesome! I didn't intend for that… O _ o**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! I NEED A REASON. (And Marik's reply was a nod to 'Midknight at the Oasis' by LittleKuriboh)**_

"I'm STRAIGHT!"

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS! (Shrinks into a corner)**_

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! Yes; someone is going to get hurt.**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! He did in the last chapter!**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Let me split this up:**_

_**Emichan: THANKS! Strange…**_

Are you kidding me? Pinkie Pie is my friggin' HERO!

_**You were the only one that got the reference! Maybe…**_

_**Phoenix: THANKS! DOWN WITH GX, ALL HAIL THE ORIGINAL SERIES! Joking, joking… Well, anyway, I had to add Zorc in at one point, and the Dragonball Z Abridged thing was requested.**_

_**And as for Cowboy Marik saving the day… Enjoy the 'Walker: Texas Ranger' Parody, featuring Marik as Chuck Norris:**_

_In the eyes of the tomb keeper, _

_The unsuspecting peeper _

_Had better know the truth of wrong from right, _

_'Cause the eyes of the tomb keeper are upon you, _

_Any wrong you do he's gonna see, _

_Whenever you're in Egypt look behind you, _

_'Cause that's where the tomb keepers are gonna be_

_**Yeah… el oh el.**_

_**Seabreeze27: THANKS! Actually, Ashley was never on Marik and Bakura's side. She was always with Yami.**_

_**VampiressBeauty20: THANKS! No, Bill was here. All. Along.**_

_**Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Kawaita Sakebi is owned by Fields of View. Quarter Pounders are owned by McDonald's. Diet Coke is owned by The Coca- Cola Company. The Gummi Bears are owned by Disney. 'Die, Potato' is owned by TomSka.**_

_Kawaita sakebi ga!_

_Kujike souna mune ni tsukisasu,_

_Kimi wo sasotte sekai wo mitai na (Come Along With Me!)_

_Darenimo dasenai, kotae ga boku no naka ni aru_

_Kake hiki ga kagi_

_Todoke, Fly at higher game!_

This morning, Marik and Bakura were unfortunate to get caught in traffic. Not just any traffic, mind you. We're talking about the kind of traffic that has cars moving a centimeter after an hour. Obviously, Marik was getting impatient. At last, he yelled, "I'VE HAD IT! Bakura, come with me."

Marik threw open the sunroof of the Marikmobile, and climbed out, with Bakura following behind. Marik turned around, tapped on the windshield, and told Odion, "Keep the car here."

Odion replied, "Yes, Master Marik."

Marik then did something that you kids should probably not try at home: He started running on the roofs of the car, with Bakura following in pursuit. When they finally got to the front of the traffic, Marik yelled, "That. Was. Friggin'. EPIC! Bakura, we should do that again sometime!"

Bakura glumly replied, "How about no?"

Soon, they got into Target. Bakura pulled out the list, and read, "Number 121: Have silly string fights with a friend. Hide behind customers and "accidentally" hit the people instead of your friend."

Marik clapped his hands. "Ooh! That sounds like FUN! And it also sounds EVIL! It's evilly fun! (Trademark)"

Soon, Marik had grabbed a can of Silly String, and walked slowly, until he 'accidentally' bumped into Duke Devlin. Marik spun around quickly, and shot the can at Duke.

Duke asked, (with his theme music) "Dude, what's your problem?"

Marik yelled back, "THANKS!" as he ran off, with Duke yelling at him behind. Marik said to himself, "I finally got myself a worthy opponent!"

_**Meanwhile…**_

Joey was browsing for trading cards, when a bunch of silly string was sprayed onto him. He 'nyeh'd', and ran off in terror.

Bakura laughed, as he discarded his can, which flew into Yuma's face. Suddenly, a bunch of silly string was sprayed onto him, causing Bakura to start hissing and batting at the air. He yelled, "Marik, it's not bloody funny!"

Marik defensively replied, "It was Melvin! He made me do it!"

Bakura crossed his arms. "Marik, I'm not stupid." Bakura then took the list, and crossed off Number 121. He then read, "Number 122: Draw mustaches on all the pictures and mannequins."

Soon, Yugi was browsing for trading cards. He stopped at one, and said, "That's strange. I don't remember the Blue Eyes White Dragon having a mustache."

Kaiba ran over, yelling, "Did somebody say 'Blue Eyes White Dragon'?" He took one look at the card, and said, "Okay, I don't want it anymore." Kaiba put the card down, and left.

Marik started to roll on the floor, laughing. Bakura rolled his eyes, and after crossing off the step, read, "Number 123: Walk up to the customer service and when they say 'Hello, how may I help you?' say 'Yes, I'll have a Quarter Pounder with cheese, one strawberry shake, a large order of French Fries and a Diet Coke.' And when they start to talk, say 'Oh, to go'. Then when they say that they can't give it to you, say 'Oh, This is because I'm gay isn't it? I'd expect this from McDonalds, but not Wal-Mart.'"

Marik ran over to the customer service, where a worker was talking on the phone. When she was finished with her conversation, she asked, "Yes?"

Marik slammed his hands on the table, and cried, "I want food and I want it now!"

The woman narrowed her eyes. "Sir, we are not a restaurant."

Marik started screaming into her face. "Oh, it's because I'm **evil**, isn't it? You're so friggin' prejudiced against people who are **evil** that you can't give an **evil **guy some friggin' food?"

The woman placed a hand on his shoulder. "Sir, I'll have to ask you to see our manager."

Then, just as planned, Bakura stomped over, and told her, "Listen, if you can't give my friend here some bloody food, there will be consequences."

The woman raised her eyebrow. "Excuse me?"

Bakura stepped in front of her. "Okay, then I'm afraid that I'll have to ravage you with my face."

_**Two whole hours later…**_

Marik's eyes widened, as he said, "Thank you, Fluffy. I'm going to have nightmares for a whole friggin' week now!"

Bakura responded with, "Good."

_**And now for the reviews!**_

While the two were finishing their list, Odion was still stuck in traffic. He murmured, "That Master Marik is such a good man. Now, if only I could get him to appreciate the Gummy Bears a little more…"

_**(LINE BREAK)**_

Melvin pointed at Ryou's face, and yelled, "Die, Limey!"

Suddenly, Ryou was taken over by Bakura, who grabbed Melvin by the cape, and whispered into his ear, "Not today."

Melvin was, to say the least, quite speechless by this.

_** Oh, come on! Don't tell me that you didn't see the 'Die, Potato' skit coming! So anyway, vote, review, and be happy! Toodles!**_

_**~Sailor Blaze**_


	43. In Which Ryou Gets Confused

_** I do not own this list. You all have my permission to MST/Dramatically Read/Parody/Draw Fanart/Write Fanfanfiction of this story. Also, IMPORTANT: I will probably not make a sequel of this. If you guys disagree and have ideas for a possible sequel, feel free to share them. Now I need to answer my comments.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! But why?**_

No. My true love for Pinkie Pie suppresses everything!

"Grrr…"

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Copyright of Marik Ishtar! Please, do not steal from Marik Ishtar, or you will probably get evilly sued! (Trademark)**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! It's annoying, isn't it?**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! Poor guy puts up with a lot. How does he do it? (laughs) SOFTSHIPPING. IT MUST HAPPEN IN A ONESHOT… or next fic. LoL.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! The 'evil' thing was a reference to the Bloodlines Let's Plays. I had to add it in; it was too epic to pass up!**_

_**Seabreeze27: THANKS! O _ o**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS! (BTW, Mana is the Ancient Egyptian Dark Magician Girl)**_

Mana: (is sleeping in bed)

Werewolf Bakura: (comes in through her window and kidnaps)

The Next Day…

Marik: Good morning – HOLY FRIG! Mana is missing!

_**Maximumride123: THANKS! That's commitment. :) Yeah, GO RAINBOW DASH! WOOT! WOOT! WOOT!**_

_**VampiressBeauty20: THANKS! **_

Melvin: (tackles Bakura)

"Get the bloody hell off of me!"

_**Raspberry 14: THANKS! Aww! (hugs)**_

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS! No, wait! Don't leave! I'll be a nice person! Marik and Bakura are sorry, too!**_

_**Shadowcharmerdemon: THANKS! **_

I'm as straight as a **EFF!**ing line!

_**Poor Real Life Frank… I bet all of the fans of this fic are making fun of him now. Hey, what else do you reference?**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Cortizone is owned by Chattem. Kawaita Sakebi (aka the YGO:tAS theme) is owned by Fields of View.**_

_Kawaita sakebi ga!_

_Kujike souna mune ni tsukisasu,_

_Kimi wo sasotte sekai wo mitai na (Come Along With Me!)_

_Darenimo dasenai, kotae ga boku no naka ni aru_

_Kake hiki ga kagi_

_Todoke, Fly at higher game!_

The two of them were still in Target from the last chapter, Marik being scarred for life, and Bakura laughing like a maniac over it. When he finally finished his laughing fit, Bakura took out the list and read, "Number 124: Get popcorn and throw it at customers, sneaking up on them in an un-stealth-like way, while yelling random things."

Soon, Marik had snatched a bag of popcorn, and snuck up on Tristan, while screaming, "Hi there!" Finally, he dumped the whole bag onto Tristan's head.

Tristan ate a piece of popcorn, and declared, "This tastes like pie!"

Duke, who was next to him, asked (with theme music!), "How is that even possible!"

"…I don't know!"

Marik returned to Bakura, who crossed off the step, and read, "Number 125: Start to madly scratch yourself, and walk up to people asking where the rash cream is, because your family and all your friends seem to have a rash too."

_**Meanwhile…**_

Yugi was pondering whether he should buy the Yu-Gi-Oh video game or not, when Marik walked over, and asked, "Excuse me, but where's the rash cream?"

Yugi said, "Malik, you don't have a rash."

Marik responded, "Well, it's called Invisirash! The most deadly of all fake diseases!"

Yugi raised an eyebrow. "I suggest that you go get a prescription for something."

Soon, Marik returned to Bakura, muttering about how he didn't need any prescriptions. Bakura crossed off Number 125, and read, "Number 126: When you're alone, have loud conversations with your 'multiple personalities'. Have an English man, a Southern person, someone from New York, a Grandma, and a 5-year-old girl all at the same time. You have to use accents. Marik, I'm changing this."

_**Somewhere in Ryou's soul room…**_

Ryou was in his soul room, reading random fanfictions that his fangirls wrote, when the door to it slammed open. He turned around, and saw a figure that he had never seen before. He asked, "Who the bloody hell are you?"

Bakura replied, "I am that voice in your head that makes you black out all of that time."

Ryou asked, "Why?"

Bakura responded, "Because I have to use your bloody body.

"Why?"

Before Bakura could respond, 'Malik' waltzed into the room, and yelled, "Hello Limey!"

Bakura asked, "Marik, how the bloody hell did you get into my mind?"

Marik responded, "You left the door to your mind wide open."

Bakura cursed and announced loudly, "At least Melvin didn't arrive as –"

Unfortunately, Bakura had said that too soon. Melvin jumped in through the door, and cried, "Hug party!"

Bakura said, "Melvin!"

"Yes, Florence?"

"NO."

Melvin walked over to Ryou, and said, "Well, hello Limey. Could I get a hug?"

Bakura grabbed his arm. "Melvin, you lay a bloody finger on my bloody hikari, and I'll-"

Marik ran over, and yelled to Bakura, "Calm the frig down!"

Bakura responded, "How the hell can I calm down when my host's life (and possible sanity) is on the bloody line?"

Suddenly, Ryou stood up. "Ok! Nobody is leaving my bloody soul room unless someone can bloody tell my what in the bloody world is going on!"

_**Meanwhile, in 'real life'…**_

Frank had shambled by Marik and Bakura. Suddenly, he stopped. It had seemed as if they were screaming at each other, each having two different voices each. Frank hid behind a shelf, and watched.

_**Back in Ryou's soul room…**_

The three 'guests' to the soul room were seated on a couch. "Let me get this straight," Ryou said, "Your name is Marik."

Marik nodded excitedly.

"You're actually bent on destroying some bloke claiming to be the king of bloody ancient Egypt."

Marik added, "A little inside! Frig, what an overreaction!"

Ryou turned to Bakura. "You're evil, and possess my body to wreak bloody havoc with this Marik person."

"It's not like I have a bloody choice," Bakura growled.

"And you," Ryou finished, pointing at Melvin, "Work for 4Kids."

Melvin corrected, "They fired me six chapters ago!"

Ryou said, "Let me finish. Also, you were Marik's imaginary childhood friend."

Marik responded, "Yes!"

There was a moment of silence. Finally, Ryou shook his head, and said, "Okay, I know I'm hallucinating. If you excuse me, I need to go and pretend that none of this ever happened." And with that, Ryou walked off.

When Marik and Bakura finally got out of Ryou's mind, Marik asked, "What did that have to do with anything?"

Bakura shrugged, as he crossed off the step, and they left for the day.

_**And now for the stinger!**_

_In a world, where card games are the only rule, a boy is just about to discover something wonderful…_

The live action version of Yugi asked, "Who are you?"

The live action version of Yami responded, "I have many names… but you can call me 'Yami.'"

_In that puzzle he completed, there existed a lonely pharaoh… the King of Card Games._

(shows clips of Yami playing Duel Monsters)

_One day, however, a mysterious woman comes to Domino City…_

The live action version of Ishizu said, "Mr. Kaiba, I need your help."

Said version of Kaiba replied, "What do you want?"

**(As Ishizu speaks, it shows live action clips of Marik and the Rare Hunters)**

Said version of Ishizu told him, "My brother Marik has created the Rare Hunters. They are a group of thieves who steal cards from others. They have stolen two of the three Egyptian God Cards: **(showing clips of the Egyptian God Cards)** Obelisk, Ra, and Slifer."

"So?"

Ishizu smiled a little. "Mr. Kaiba, in order to attract these 'Rare Hunters' and help me reclaim the God Cards, you must host a tournament."

**(The scene changes to Marik and Bakura's first meeting.)**

The live action Marik pursued Bakura, and finally stopped him by grabbing his arm. He cried, "My name is Marik!"

Bakura turned around, pulled his arm out of Marik's grasp, and responded with, "I don't care."

Marik thought, and continued: "What if I told you that I had knowledge of certain powers?"

Bakura got interested. A smirk formed on him face, as he told him: "Go on."

_In order to save the world from certain doom, it'll take friendship…_

Live Action Yugi yelled, "JOEY! I know that you're in there!"

Live Action Joey stared at Yugi, longing to break free of the mind control, as inside, Marik pressured him with, "What are you waiting for? MAKE YOUR FRIGGIN' MOVE!"

_ Courage…_

The live action Yami yelled, "Marik, you monster! Why would you do this?"

The live action Yami Marik laughed in reply.

_…And a whole lot of card games._

"I summon the Dark Magician Girl," the Live Action Yami declared as a blonde girl descended into the duel, an aura of sparkles surrounding her.

**(Several other clips are shown, including scenes from Marik's backstory, the duel between Yami and Bakura, Yami Marik appearing, the Egyptian God Cards, random Duel Monsters, a kiss between Tea and Yami, and the Seven Millenium Objects, all in live action.)**

The live action Tea grabbed Yami's shoulder, and whispered, "Pharaoh…"

The live action Yami turned to Tea, and asked, "Yes?"

"Don't let us down."

_**YU-GI-OH: BATTLE CITY: THE LIVE ACTION MOVIE**_

_**IN 3-D!**_

_**Coming Soon To Theaters**_

The Live Action Yami turned to the screen, and pulled out a card, saying, "It's time to duel."

_**Oh god. I nearly wrote in 'Ryan Reynolds as Yami' above the movie title. Well, thank god that I didn't. So, vote, and remember: this will probably not get a sequel. Enjoy the rest of your Sunday!**_


	44. In Which Marik Curbstomps Frank

_** Ladies and Gents, we have another musical number this chapter! Because we totally need another one of those! Yeah!**_

_**I don't own this list; you have my permission to do things with this, blah blah blah, COMMENTS!**_

_**PhilThePersonaGuy: THANKS! Windows Movie Maker? O _ o **_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! True…**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! (backs away)**_

NO! She is my true love!

"Care to run that by me again?"

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS! Yes! Yes they are!**_

_**MaximumRide123: THANKS! HECK YEAH! Let us fly away with Rainbow Dash!**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Sailorblaze: I've got this. (Flies away on horse sized Rainbow Dash) And I didn't turn your damn cat against you!

_**Vampiressbeauty20: THANKS!**_

Melvin: Care to join me?

_**Can I pain Bella with you? I hate Twilight, too!**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! Care to join us? Poor lil' Ryou… Hopefully, the movie won't be as bad as Dragonball Z the Movie.**_

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS! Actually, Bakura just took control of Ryou.**_

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS!**_

I'm STRAIGHT!

'_**Kura's not albino. He has brown eyes.**_

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! Crap, I forgot about **__**DAN GREEN**__**! He'll appear this chapter.**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! **_

"I ravaged her with my bloody face…"

_**When Discord (from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic) goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Marik Ishtar. Say 'protagonists', it's more ambiguous. **_

_**Guardian Aelita: THANKS! **_

"Like THIS?"

Fluffy? I don't think that that knife should be near my neck.

"(Laughs insanely)"

"It's not friggin' funny!"

"It is to me! (Continues laughter)"

_**Why is he sexy like that? Just asking…**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! It would probably be made either in Japan or by a group of cosplayers.**_

_**Raspberry 14: THANKS! I'm glad that you are. :)**_

_**Squarepotatoes: THANKS! Same here, but replace 'Bakura' with 'Marik'.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Moves Like Jagger is owned by Maroon 5 and Christina Aguilera. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic is owned by Lauren Faust. "You're going to LOVE ME!" is also owned by Lauren Faust. The Meat Dress is owned by Lady Gaga. **_

"You know, Marik," Bakura lampshaded as the duo walked into Target that day, "I haven't helped but noticed that we haven't had a musical number in a while." Suddenly, Marik's face brightened. Bakura turned around and said to himself, "I really shouldn't have bloody said that."

Bakura took out the list, and read, "Number 127: Start 'dancing' like mad. Basically, just wail your arms and legs around like you're having some kind of massive seizure."

Suddenly, background music started, which made Bakura cringe. Marik sung:

_Just shoot for the stars,_

_If it feels right,_

_And aim for my heart,_

_If you feel like,_

_And take me away and make it OK_

_I swear I'll behave_

_You wanted control,_

_So we waited,_

_I put on a show,_

_Now I make it,_

_You say I'm a kid,_

_My ego is big,_

_I don't give a __**EFF!**_

_And it goes like this_

"Marik, we really don't need another bloody musical number," Bakura angrily pointed out.

Marik replied, "WE DO!" He grabbed Bakura's hands, and started spinning around with him.

_Take me by the tongue,_

_And I'll know you!_

_Kiss me 'til you're drunk,_

_And I'll show you_

_All the moves like Jagger,_

_I've got the moves like Jagger,_

_I've got the mo-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-oves like Jagger!_

_I don't need to try to control you,_

_Look into my eyes and I'll own you_

_With them moves like Jagger,_

_I've got the moves like Jagger,_

_I've got the mo-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-oves like-_

"MARIK!"

Marik asked, "Yes?"

Bakura growled, "Marik, this is not a musical."

Marik responded with, "Frig, what a killjoy!"

Bakura rolled his eyes and crossed off Number 127. Then, he read, "Number 128: Try on crazy costumes and walk casually through the store."

Marik gave Bakura a thumbs up, and ran off, looking for crazy costumes. Suddenly, he stopped near Bandit Keith, who was dressed in a rather strange fashion Marik asked, "What the **EFF!** are you wearing?"

Keith replied, "HEY! Today is a special holiday… IN AMERICA!"

Marik responded with, "Well, I'm not from America, am I? And can I have your hat?"

Keith groaned, and handed it over. "You better not damage it… IN AMERICA!"

Soon, Marik came upon a section full of meat. He got an idea, and grabbed several packages.

_**Meanwhile…**_

Bakura was waiting by the entrance when Marik came over, wearing a Pilgrim hat and something made out of… wait a moment, was that meat he was wearing?

Bakura asked, "Marik… what the bloody hell?"

Marik replied, "It's my new outfit, Fluffy! Don't you like it?"

"No." Bakura begrudgingly crossed off Number 127, and read, "Number 128: Stick your arm in your jacket and suspiciously start to leave the store. Get really tense, and start to lean over as your walking through the doors as if you're suspecting the alarms to go off. Then when it doesn't go off, let out a big sigh. Then quickly look around you to see who's watching and run away as fast as you can. I guess that I better do this."

_**Soon…**_

Bakura stuck his arm in his trenchcoat, and scurried over to the exit. As he inched closer, it was obvious that Bakura was getting more nervous with each inch towards the exit. When he passed by the door alarms without setting them off, Bakura sighed. Just as he was about to leave, though, an arm grabbed his trenchcoat.

Bakura spun around, and saw Frank the Gullible Zombie Target Employee staring angrily at him. Frank moaned, "Whaaaaat aaaaareeee yoooooouuuuu doooooiiiiing?"

Bakura growled, "I'm trying to leave the bloody store. What does it look like?"

Frank ignored him, and said, "Diiiiiid yooouuuu steeeeeaaaaaal aaaaaanythiiiiiing?"

"No."

Frank didn't listen, and started to rummage around in the black trenchcoat, looking for any potential items that had been stolen. Finally, Frank found a tiny figure of Twilight Sparkle that Ryou had bought some time ago. Frank waved it in Bakura's face, and said, "Thiiiiiiiis iiiiiiis proooooooooof."

Bakura's face was covered in shock. "Where the hell did that figure come from? I didn't get it!"

Frank announced, "Iiiiiii'm goooooiiiiiing tooooo-" Suddenly, Frank was whacked on the head, and fell over. Standing behind him was Marik, brandishing the Millennium Rod.

Marik yelled, "And that's what happens when you **EFF!** with my bread and butter!" Suddenly, Marik finally acknowledged Bakura. He greeted him with, "Hello, Fluffy!"

_**And now for the stingers!**_

_At the house of one of the world's biggest haters of Ryou… _**(Apologies to Ryou Fangirls everywhere!)**

A girl was watching episodes of Yu-Gi-Oh, saying, "I love this show! Except for that little British kid. When will he ever get a-"

Suddenly, Ryou thrust the door open, and in a raspier voice than usual, yelled, "You're going to LOVE ME!"

The girl hid under the couch.

_**(LINE BREAK)**_

Yami stomped around the room, asking nobody in particular, "Why have I not been in the last three chapters?"

_** Wow! We have the same number of chapters as My Immortal now! I'm already thinking of the Christmas Special! (It's going to be based off of 'A Christmas Carol'.) Until next time!**_


	45. In Which Marik Gets Betrayed

_**We're back, readers! I don't own this list! You have my permission to do things! Now… IT'S TIME… to answer… COMMENTS!**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! That was a quote from Friendship is Magic. Yeah, who would hate the little guy?**_

_**Guardian Aelita: THANKS! You're welcome; I tell all of my readers 'thank you'! Sure, you can hug him!**_

"I'm not cute! I'm a bloody evil mastermind, and you dared to call me cute?"

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! And thank you for the Softshipping. I loved it. Maybe you should do the Hugo Cabret movie with Softshipping one day, even if it isn't really… shippy.**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! A friend of mine liked Yugi and wanted him to appear. Go ahead and glomp him, but don't suffocate the poor limey!**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! JUSTIN BEIBER? (Bum Bum Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum!)**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! **_

"Bugger."

_**Yes. Yes it was. Nah, but it shows that Ryou can be affected as well. Dude, how would a five year old write the lemons? **_

Because Lady Gaga is also my hero! And I didn't try to kill him! I only gave him a friggin' concussion!

_**Squarepotatoes: THANKS! Thanks a ton! Especially Fluttershy.**_

_**FangandIggyRule: THANKS! **_

Well, bread and butter are the basics of life. Now figure out the rest.

_**Yes. Ryou is also a Brony. He just keeps his broniness to himself. (Broniness is now a word.)**_

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS!  
><strong>_

WE'RE SORRY! Frig!

_**Shadowcharmerdemon: THANKS! No, he's not.**_

YES I AM!

_**Nope. **_

**"**How in the bloody world was I caught?"

_**Ooh, what scenes do you act out? **_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! O _ o But how does this relate to Psycho Bakura?**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS! You mean Rainbow Dash? Sure, I can lend her to Marik. It's fine, I hate Twilight as well. Ok, I'll take that into consideration.**_

'Marik': What the bloody hell?

'Bakura': I don't know what just – HOLY FRIG!

'Melvin': Hello! It's bloody good to see you all!

'Ryou': (taps Angelucie on the shoulder) Can I have a hug?

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! **_

No, you're going to love ME!

_**Maximumride123: THANKS! YES! Onward, Dash!**_

_**RoseHeartsAtem01: THANKS! O _ o**_

_**Uquiorra12345: THANKS! Yes they are.**_

_**Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh. The Italian Opening of Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Giorgio Vanni. Circus is owned by Britney Spears. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. The Force is owned by George Lucas. Rain Drops Keep Falling On My Head is owned by Burt Bacharach. The last stinger is owned by Tomska.**_

_Vivi in un presenti magico vincente,_

_Super sorprendente Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_Entri un passato monzaviato,_

_Che ti e risvegliato adesso Yu-Gi-Oh…_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (That's your name!)_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (Play the game!)_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (It's yours!)_

As the Marikmobile pulled into Target, Marik asked, "Bakura, why the frig is our opening theme in Italian?"

Bakura responded with, "Marik, now is not the time to break the Fourth Wall."

When they entered the actual store, Bakura pulled out the list and read, "Number 130: Balance EVERYTHING you see on the tips of your finger, your nose, your forehead, and the top of your head while singing the circus song."

Unfortunately, Bakura did not specify which circus song he was talking about, and had to listen to Marik sing that Britney Spears song:

_When I put on a show_

_I feel the adrenaline moving through my veins _

_Spotlight on me and I'm ready to break _

_I'm like a performer, the dancefloor is my stage _

_Better be ready, hope that ya feel the same! _

Luckily, that was the only part of the song that was sung. Bakura breathed a sigh of relief, and read, "Number 131: Spend hours staring at a little blinking light. After a while, start saying blink everytime it blinks. Don't look away, just stay mesmerized."

Soon, Marik came across a tiny blinking light. The light blinked. Marik stared. The light blinked again. Marik stared. Yet again, the light blinked, and Marik was still staring at the light.

_**Two hours later…**_

The light blinked. "Blink!" The light blinked again, and Marik yelled, "Blink!" in response.

Bakura came up, and asked, "Marik?"

Marik snapped out of it, turned around, and asked, "Yes?"

Bakura said, "Never mind!" Soon, they came out. Bakura crossed off Number 131, and read, "Number 132: Light a match under a sprinkler."

_**Soon…**_

Bakura, who was struggling under the weight of Marik, yelled, "Will you hurry up? I can't hold you up for any longer!"

Marik replied, "Will you hold still? I can't focus!" Finally, Marik lit the match, and held it up to the sprinkler, where – Woah, woah, wait.

Before we continue, I need to say something. You see, Bill had the bright idea to place a bunch sprinkler systems that were each a centimeter apart, and covered the whole ceiling like moss on a wall. He did this, because he would have any potential fires doused in 3 seconds.

So, as soon as the match was held up, the whole sprinkler system was set off. As soon as he got down, Marik pulled out an umbrella, and opened it up. Then, Marik told Bakura, "Fluffy, don't get in."

Bakura replied, "Marik, I need to-

"NO!" And with that, Marik strolled out.

_**Meanwhile…**_

"This is just fan-tucking-fastic," Yami said, "I knew that I should have brought my umbrella today!"

Joey yelled, "NYEH!" and immediately brought out a My Little Pony umbrella, and held it over Yami and himself.

"Thanks Joey," Yami thanked.

_**Meanwhile (Again)…**_

Marik ran out of Target, and closed the umbrella. He said, "Well, I'm glad that nothing bad happened! Especially not right now!"

Suddenly, the sliding doors opened. Bakura, hair completely drenched, stomped out of Target, and stood in front of Marik. Marik attempted to hold back laughter, but failed, and started laughing hysterically at Bakura.

Bakura, on the other hand, did not agree, and grabbed Marik by the midriff-baring shirt. He whispered, "So, you think that this is funny?"

Marik happily answered, "Yes! I do!"

Bakura growled, "Well, let me tell you something, Marik: This isn't funny. You aren't funny-"

Marik retorted, "You're one to talk, Fluffy! You're always serious!"

"QUIET!" Bakura was somewhat surprised at how loud that was. Eventually, the surprise faded away, and he finished with, "You know what? I'm done!"

Marik snapped into reality. "Wait, what?"

"I said, 'I'm done.'"

Marik asked, "But why? You were with me from the beginning!"

Bakura yelled, "Open your bloody eyes, Marik! I never wanted to do this from the beginning! It was you who forced me into your bloody escapades!"

Marik started, "But Fluffy-"

"I'm leaving!" And with that, Bakura turned around, and walked off. Then, he stopped, and yelled over his shoulder, "You know what? I'm going to that manager bloke!"

Marik gasped. "You wouldn't!"

Bakura laughed evilly. Then, he smirked, and replied with, "I just did."

Bakura walked off, with Marik yelling behind him, "You traitor! You **EFF!**ing traitor! Get the **EFF! **back here now! Get back here, or I'll change your **EFF!**ing middle name to Steve! Then, you'll never **EFF!**ing betray me! FOR **EFF!**ING EVER!"

_**Meanwhile…**_

_Bill the Manager's Evil Council!_

Bill stood up, and asked, "Okay, who has a plan to defeat these 'pranksters'?"

Dartz stood up, and answered, "I still say 'hat we should DUE 'HEM!"

Yami got out a translator, and held it up to find out what Dartz was saying. Unfortunately, the translator did not know either. Yami shrugged, and replied, "I say we either challenge them to a children's card game, or that we mind crush them to oblivion." Yami tried to tune out Yugi's lecture on why mind crushing was bad from where Yugi was inside the puzzle.

Joey stood up, and yelled, "We could use Brooklyn Rage!'

Yami replied, "Joey, none of us are from Brooklyn. You aren't, either."

Suddenly, Bakura threw open the doors, and entered the room, causing everyone to gasp. Bill stood up, and demanded, "You're not welcome here! Leave!"

Bakura crossed his arms, and replied, "Am I still welcome if I defected?" Yami and Joey exchanged looks with one another.

As Bill welcomed the newcomer, Yami said, "Joey, we need to talk in private."

They went into the hallway. Yami told Joey, "Joey, I think that something is very wrong with this."

Joey replied, "Nyeh, I agree, Yug'. Da last thing dat I need is for dat kitty to bust in!"

Yami replied, "And if he's being sincere about defecting… Joey, we need to fix this mess up."

_**And now for the stingers!**_

Ishizu was sitting in the living room of her house. Suddenly, she felt as if something was very, very wrong. Ishizu whispered to herself, "There's a great disturbance in the Force… I can predict it."

_**(LINE BREAK)**_

As we once again watched the sprinklers being set off, and what happened during that time, a song played.

_Raindrops keep falling on my head,_

_And just like the guy whose feet are too big for his bed,_

_Nothin' seems to fit,_

_Those raindrops are falling on my head,_

_They keep falling…_

_So I just did some talkin' to the sun,_

_And I said I didn't like the way he' got things done,_

_Sleepin' on the job,_

_Those raindrops are falling on my head, _

_They keep falling…_

_But there's one thing I know,_

_The blues he sends to meet me won't defeat me,_

_It won't be long till happiness steps up to greet me!_

_Raindrops keep falling on my head,_

_But that doesn't mean my eyes will soon be turnin' red,_

_Crying's not for me,_

_Cause I'm never gonna stop the rain by complainin',_

_Because I'm free!_

_Nothing's worrying me!_

_**(LINE BREAK)**_

Bill ran after Marik, screaming, "Hey kid! You can't skate here!"

Marik yelled back, "You can't tell me what to do!" Suddenly, he faceplanted into one of the walls.

_**And we're going off into an epic new story arc! So, it's time to sound off: If you were Marik in this chapter, what would you do when Bakura deserted you in front of Target! So, vote for a song, and stay tuned!**_


	46. In Which Thiefshipping Actually Happens

_** Thiefshippers, you guys are going to love this chapter. Non thiefshippers, you guys are **__**not**__** going to love this chapter. And for those who don't care, you probably still won't care about the whole mess.**_

_** I don't own this list. You all have my permission to do things about this story. (And IMPORTANT: Tell your friends about this! We don't really need more publicity, but it'll sure help!) Now, time to answer our comments!**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Once again, we shall split this up:**_

_**Phoenix: THANKS!**_

"It was NOT bloody funny!"

YAY! Snickerdoodles!

_** I thought people would; who doesn't love a good old fashioned Star Wars reference? Sorry; I was busy on Friday, with seeing the Hugo Cabret movie and everything.**_

_**Emichan: THANKS! Oh, then yes, it's kind of sad. It's not my favorite song from her, but I still like it.**_

__"Nope. I really did desert him. (makes an 'unsmile')"

GAH! Fluffy, your smiling is horrible! YAY! Pinkie Pie! And I'll think about how to use you two to my friggin' advantage.

_**Vampiressbeauty20: THANKS! But if you do that, he won't be fluffy anymore! **_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

'Ryou': (grins insanely and pulls out a knife) HUUUUUG!

'Marik': Did you not see the bloody warnings? We all swapped bodies!

'Bakura': (cough cough) BAKURA IS A NARCISSIST! (cough cough)

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! I'd be super ticked off as well.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl - sademo588: THANKS! But what did you think of the last chapter?**_

_**PhilThePersonaGuy: THANKS! Loved the Portal 2 reference. I just got a mental image of a very, very cynical version of Marik.**_

_**FangandIggyRule: THANKS! I can't believe it either! Okay, then you don't have to hear me remind everyone.**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! **_

NO! Not after my partner betrayed me!

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! If I were Marik, I would probably slap Bakura in the face and scream at him for hours upon hours.**_

_**Millenniummonkey23: THANKS! Wow, a lot of people want to change Fluffy's name to Steve.**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! **_

__Well, excuse me, princess!

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Why did I think that you would type down, 'NOOO! Not Bakura! Why, Blaze? Why?' Then again, that isn't very characteristic of you... At most points...**_

_**Shadowcharmerdemon: THANKS! Mostly, I know from reading 'Censored Town' and 'Midknight at the Oasis'. What's a BOJ, and why does Marik need to own up? Also... YAY FOR PHINEAS AND FERB! Sure, you can pet Bakura. His hair's very soft.**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/Martin Billany. The Italian Opening of Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Giorgio Vanni. Heartless is owned by Kanye West, but the version in this fic is owned by The Fray. 'I'm so pathetic' is owned by Lauren Faust. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro.**_

_Vivi in un presenti magico vincente,_

_Super sorprendente Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_Entri un passato monzaviato,_

_Che ti e risvegliato adesso Yu-Gi-Oh…_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (That's your name!)_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (Play the game!)_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (It's your move!)_

Yami and Joey were in front of Marik's house. Joey asked, "So, is dis da place, Yug'?"

Yami replied, "That's what I'm guessing at." He opened the door.

Soon, the two of them came into the living room. Ishizu stood up, and said, "I predicted that you would arrive. My younger brother's in a terrible state of depression."

Yami asked, "How bad are we talking?"

"The point where he grabs a guitar and starts singing covers of Kanya West songs," Ishizu replied, pointing towards a door.

When Yami and Joey walked in through that door, they heard:

_In the night, I hear them talk,_

_The coldest story ever told,_

_Somewhere far along this road, he lost his soul_

_To a woman so heartless,_

_How could you be so heartless?  
><em> 

Finally, Marik placed down the guitar, and whined, "How the frig could you be so heartless, Fluffy?" Marik rolled onto his bed, crying, "Why? Why? Why?" Finally, he screamed, "I'm so **EFF!**ing pathetic!" The rest of his emotional breakdown was drowned out by tears.

Yami stormed over to where Marik laid, and slapped him across the face. Then, Yami sternly cried, "Marik, get a grip on yourself!"

Marik sat up, and took a look at who had entered his room. He stood up and yelled, "Why the frig are you two here?"

Joey replied, "Listen. Do ya think dat we like Bakura hangin' with Bill either? We don't, and dat's why we decided to fix dis mess."

Yami said, "Well, Joey said what I was going to said. In the meantime, while we figure things out, you'll have to go to Target. Alone."

"Why?" 

"Because the author can't figure out who else should team up with you, that's what!"

_**At Target...**_

Marik pulled out the list, and stared sadly at it. After a minute, he read, "Number 133: Walk up to someone and say 'Oh, so you're back for more. I warned you never to come back here. Wait here while I go get my shot gun.' Then, walk away."

Duke Devlin was trying to figure out where he could buy more of the pants that was thrown on his head, when Marik came up, and said, "Oh, so you came back to steal more of my fangirls from me?"

Duke stared at Marik, and asked (with theme music), "Wait, who are you again?"

Marik yelled back, "That doesn't friggin' matter! Wait here while I get the contract that will change your name to Steve!" And with a huff, Marik stormed off. When he rounded a corner, he pulled out the list once more, crossed off Number 133, and read, "Number 134: Buy something that is $5, and give the cashier all pennies."

Soon, Marik headed to the checkout, carrying a light up Pinkie Pie figure. As he went, he passed by Dan Green, who broke the 4th wall by saying, "Hello, this is Dan Green! I'm making a pointless cameo!"

Marik stopped, and asked, "Why?"

Dan Green thought for a short while. Then, he replied, "I really don't know."

Marik shrugged, and went off to buy the figure, and of course, Cathy the Cashier had to count all of the pennies. Once again, everyone in the line complained, especially Tea, who yelled, "Hey! Holding up a line is not a nice thing to do to your friends! When you hold up the line, they feel sad, and that's not very friendly! Do you hear me? FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC!"

When Marik finally got out of line, he pulled out the list, crossed off Number 134, and read, "Number 135: Walk up to a guy and say, 'Oh my god, is it you? Oh my god, it is! I haven't seen you in so long!' Then, kiss him. After that, slap and him say, 'Why didn't you ever call me?' Then walk away. Much more effective if you're a guy."

Suddenly, Marik looked up, and saw Bakura. He was just standing in the middle of the store. Marik ran over to Bakura, and cried, "Fluffy! You're back! Did that manager hurt you? You returned to help me, right?"

Bakura turned around, and told Marik, "No, Marik, we're done. I have no more intention of helping you complete that bloody list."

Marik grabbed his hands, and cried, "But Fluffy! We haven't seen each other in so friggin' long! That's like a million years long!"

Bakura growled, "Marik, I have had enough with your bloody idiocy. Now, if you excuse me, I need to-" Bakura was interrupted by Marik squeezing him into a big hug (Not a Melvin one, a regular one) and then kissing him.

All across the world, yaoi fangirls screamed and applauded in delight. Sailorblaze drank a glass of milk. And everyone else was as confused as hell.

Marik finished, and said, "Okay, now I'm done." He left Target, leaving a very confused Bakura behind.

And that, my friends, was how Censored Town was started. No, not really. But you can imagine that that happened.

_**And now for the stinger!**_

_Bill The Manager's Evil Council!_

Bill asked Bakura, "So, do you have any ideas on how to defeat the prankster?"

Bakura, however, was unresponsive. Ever since the events of that afternoon, he had been thrown into a BSOD.

Bill grabbed Bakura by the shirt, and growled, "Answer me, soldier. How do you think we should save our store?"

Finally, Bakura responded, "I'm actually not sure-"

"Now, let's not forget who volunteered himself into this..."

Bakura shifted in his seat in an uncharacteristic manner. "Actually, I'm starting to doubt if that was a very good idea."

"THAT'S IT!" Bill grabbed Bakura's sleeve, and dragged him off, saying, "If you can't be loyal and obedient, I'll _make sure _that you stay loyal and obedient..."

"Oh, Ra no! This is not going to end well," Yami whispered to Joey.

"Why do ya think so, Yug'?" Joey asked. Yami leaned in and murmured his response to Joey, who yelled, "NYEH! We need ta do somethin', and fast!"

_**(LINE BREAK)**_

_**Meanwhile, at Target...**_

Tea cried, "And also, don't curse! Cursing can hurt your friend's feelings! How would you like it if you were trying to be a good friend, but all that your friends would do was spout bad language at you? You wouldn't like it, right? Right! So, don't curse!"

_** IMPORTANT: Okay, we've got two questions for you to answer this chapter:**_

_**1. How did you react when Bakura betrayed Marik last chapter?  
><strong>_

_**2. What do you think Bill is going to do to Fluffy?**_

_** Okay... things are not looking shiny in the future. Stay tuned, and tell your friends about this story!**_


	47. In Which Stuff Gets Real

_** Hey dudes! Happy you liked the Thiefshipping last time! I don't own the list, you have my permission to spread the news, now to answer… ze comments!**_

_**Vampiressbeauty20: THANKS! How was it hot?**_

_**PhilThePersonaGuy: THANKS! Loving the Portal 2 references. Bakura is Wheatley!**_

_**FangandIggyRule: THANKS! I've never seen the Spice Girls movie. Sorry.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! I thought you would.**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! Why are you not surprised? And oh crap, Bill's gonna have… tea parties?**_

_**MyFalseTruth: THANKS!  
><strong>_

"Nope."

_**Sweet Cheesus, messiah of all cheese! That's cruel!**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! It's the actual Italian theme to Yu-Gi-Oh… and what did you think of Fluffy's betrayal?**_

_**Shadowcharmerdemon: THANKS! (Sings Today Is Gonna Be A Great Day with Zilla)**_

"What is with everyone petting me?"

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS!  
><strong>_

_**Emichan: THANKS! A BSOD is when a character is in such a state of shock, they become unresponsive. How would he become a robot? **_

"Again, nope."

_**How are you acting like Depressed Marik? **_

_**Phoenix: THANKS! What, you don't like Thiefshipping? Dartz went fishing. XD**_

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS!**_

(Gives a nice hug) WAH! He's so mean!

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! I see… Oh heck no! It's not THAT bad!**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! So, you did say it… O _ O Why did you feel sad? Okay… that's vague…**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! What's Better Living Industries?**_

_**Maximumride123: THANKS! We can be strong, we can be strong, out on this lonely road, on the road to awesome…**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS! **_

'Bakura': Well, frig. How are we going to find my dark side?

'Marik': I don't bloody know!

'Bakura': Jerk!

'Marik': I'm not going to do it.

'Bakura': Narcissist!

'Marik': Okay, now I'm ticked. (Roars and tackles 'Bakura')

_**Marilynjayfreak: THANKS! Yes he is. :D**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. The Italian Opening to Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Giorgio Vanni. The Spice Girls Movie is owned by The Spice Girls. Bad Romance is owned by Lady Gaga. Lucky Charms is owned by General Mills.**_

_Vivi in un presenti magico vincente,_

_Super sorprendente Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_Entri un passato monzaviato,_

_Che ti e risvegliato adesso Yu-Gi-Oh…_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (That's your name!)_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (Play the game!)_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (It's your move!)_

When Marik came to Target today, he did not arrive alone. Instead, he brought along a replacement that would do for the moment, but possibly not for the entire fanfic. That temporary replacement was none other than Maximillion Pegasus.

"I can't quite understand why you would want to go back to this faaaabulous store," Pegasus stated.

Marik replied, "We still need to embarrass the Pharaoh, now don't we?"

There were no more questions about the subject as the duo went into Target. Marik pulled out the list, and read, "Number 136: Stand next to a mannequin, and pretend that you're a mannequin. Try to hold the same position for as long as possible. Then finally as someone is walking by, check your watch and say, 'Finally, my shift is done. I really don't get paid enough to do this.'"

Soon, Mokuba passed by the clothing department, and thought that he saw a familiar figure. Mokuba walked back over, and took a look at the mannequin.

The 'mannequin' said, "Why, hellooooo."

Mokuba ran to Kaiba, and yelled, "Seto! Pegasus was a clothing store mannequin!"

Kaiba ignored Mokuba, and told him, "Mokuba, this is why I don't let you eat Lucky Charms anymore."

Mokuba sighed, and followed Kaiba to the checkout lane. Marik crossed off the step, and read: "Number 137: Stare at the ceiling. See how many people look up."

Soon, Marik wandered into the middle of the store, and looked upwards. Suddenly, Frank came, and looked upwards as well. Then, everyone else arrived and looked in the same direction. Everyone was so distracted, no one noticed Marik sneaking off.

Marik returned to Pegasus, crossed off Number 137, and read, "Number 138: Start singing oldies songs in to megaphone."

Pegasus cheered with, "Ooh, I know the perfect song to sing!"

Marik frowned. "Pegasus, if it's the Spice Girls, NO." Pegasus sighed sadly. Then, Marik picked up a megaphone, and sung:

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh,_

_Caught in a bad romance!_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh,_

_Caught in a bad romance!_

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah-a!_

_Roma-roma-mamaa!_

_Ga-ga-ooh-la-la,_

_Want your bad romance!_

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah-ah!_

_Roma-roma-mamaa!_

_Ga-ga-ooh-la-la,_

_Want your bad romance!_

Meanwhile, Bakura slowly walked into the store, eyes covered by sunglasses. He walked over to where a crowd was starting to form, and listened to the song.

_I want your ugly,_

_I want your disease_

_I want your everything,_

_As long as it's free,_

_I want your love_

_(Love-love-love I want your love)_

_I want your drama,_

_The touch of your hand,_

_I want your leather-studded kiss in the sand_

_I want your love_

_Love-love-love,_

_I want your love_

_(Love-love-love I want your love)_

Marik saw Bakura in the crowd, and yelled, "Fluffy!" Unfortunately, Bakura didn't respond. Marik shrugged it off, and continued.

_You know that I want you,_

_And you know that I need you,_

_I want it bad, your bad romance!_

_I want your love and_

_I want your revenge,_

_You and me could write a bad romance!_

_(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh!)_

_I want your love and_

_All your lovers' revenge,_

_You and me could write a bad romance_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh,_

_Caught in a bad romance!_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh,_

_Caught in a bad romance!_

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah-ah!_

_Roma-roma-mamaa!_

_Ga-ga-ooh-la-la,_

_Want your bad romance!_

Marik attempted communication again. "FLUFFY!" Bakura turned towards Marik's direction, and seemed to acknowledge him, but didn't say anything else.

_I want your horror,_

_I want your design,_

'_Cause you're a criminal_

_As long as you're mine,_

_I want your love_

_(Love-love-love I want your love-uuhh)_

_I want your psycho,_

_Your vertigo stick,_

_Want you in my rear window_

_Baby you're sick,_

_I want your love_

_Love-love-love,_

_I want your love_

_(Love-love-love I want your love)_

Marik once again attempted communication with Bakura. "Fluffy kitty! How's it going?" Seeing as how well the last few attempts worked, I think you can guess for yourself how this turned out.

_You know that I want you,_

_And you know that I need you,_

_('Cause I'm a free bitch, baby!)_

_I want it bad, a bad romance!_

_I want your love and_

_I want your revenge,_

_You and me could write a bad romance!_

_(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh!)_

_I want your love and_

_All your lovers' revenge,_

_You and me could write a bad romance!_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh,_

_Caught in a bad romance!_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh,_

_Caught in a bad romance!_

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah-ah!_

_Roma-roma-mamaa!_

_Ga-ga-ooh-la-la,_

_Want your bad romance!_

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah-ah!_

_Roma-roma-mamaa!_

_Ga-ga-ooh-la-la,_

_Want your bad romance!_

Yami and Joey looked up from where they were hiding. Yami said, "Why do I think that this is not going to end very well?"

Suddenly, a voice cut off the background music, saying, "Attention, Duelists! My hair says that there is now a special viewing of The Spice Girls Movie! Free popcorn for everyone!"

The crowd, especially Pegasus, ran out of the store, although people who weren't Pegasus just wanted to get free popcorn. They left behind a confused Marik, Bakura, and Yami and Joey, who were still hiding.

Marik ran over to Bakura, and wrapped his arms around Bakura, while saying, "I knew that you'd return!"

Suddenly, Marik was knocked out. Not by a Mind Crush, though. He was just knocked out. Bakura threw away the bat, and grinned. Bakura removed the sunglasses that he was wearing, revealing a blank look in his eyes. Everything was going according to plan.

Yami and Joey watched in shock as Bakura dragged off Marik. The former crossed his arms, and told Joey, "Okay, this has gone far enough."

Joey asked, "Yug' what are we gonna do?"

Yami turned his head in Joey's direction. "We have to tell someone who knows what to do."

_**Soon…**_

Ishizu heard a knock at the door. _Marik must be home by now,_ she thought. Alas, she was greeted by Yami and Joey. "Why, hello, Pharaoh," Ishizu greeted, "Make yourself at home."

Soon, they were all talking over bottles of water. Ishizu asked, "So, you're sure?"

Yami nodded. "Yes. I believe that somehow, Bill was able to brainwash Bakura to obey him, even though there was nothing implying that he had those powers in the first place. So now, your brother is probably who knows where."

Ishizu said, "Okay. What do you need me to do?"

Joey replied, "Well, we need a copy of dat list."

Ishizu handed over a sheet of paper. "One thing that I'm confused over, though: Why are you helping Marik?"

Yami responded, "It's one thing to encounter those two every _BLEEP!_ing day. It's another thing to have one of them in Bill's Council."

"I see," Ishizu noted.

Joey told Yami, "If only we knew where dey were goin'…"

Ishizu said, "I think that I can help with that." She tapped the Millennium Necklace, and closed her eyes in concentration. After a while, she told them, "I predicted where they were."

_**And now for the stinger!**_

_And now for a clip from the Zorc and Pals Disney/Michael Bay/Seltzerberg movie!_

Zorc, Marik, and Bakura were crossing along 'The Valley of Leaning Buildings' in order to find the Millenium Scales. Suddenly, they came across one tall building in the middle of the leaning ones.

Marik cried, "Holy fr- I mean, flubberloony!"

Bakura pointed out, "Marik, wrong word-"

"SILENCE!" Marik continued with, "That building is as straight as a rod!" He turned to the screen, and explained, "Get it? I have the Millennium Rod, and that building's as straight as a rod! Aren't I the funniest person that existed?"

Bakura muttered, "I can't believe that Marik got his own bloody joke wrong!"

_** Yeah, not too many stingers today. Tune in next time, when the story arc reaches an epic conclusion, and the ways are used in a 'creative' way! Tune in! And if you didn't pay attention, Bakura was brainwashed by Bill.**_


	48. In Which Bakura Does A Heel Face Turn

_** I don't own this list. Please spread the news about this fanfiction. Also, we're close to 500 reviews! Now, time for what you've been waiting for: THE COMMENTS!**_

_**PhilThePersonaGuy: THANKS! No, don't you dare hurt Bakura!**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS!**_

"(Hisses and twitches)"

_**Vampiressbeauty20: THANKS! Don't worry; the good guys will save us!  
><strong>_

_**Maximumride123: THANKS! Nah, it's a story arc. They happen in anime. COME ON, DASH!**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Why? Oh… you mean the Joel Schumacher one?**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Oh, I see. Why? He is. XD How did you react to Bakura's brainwashing? No, we're not done with the actual story… yet. XD Is Phoenix fishing with Dartz?**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: Oh… seeing as I'm not a big MCR-aholic, I am extremely confused.**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Bakura-ception. Thanks for the card; I'll give it to Marik when he gets back. Is that because Bakura opens his shirt at every possible moment in his episode? Did you? If so, how did it go? So can I…**_

_**Raspberry 14: THANKS! I wish he would. Unfortunately, I can't put him in EVERY chapter.  
><strong>_

_**Ryanneravenstarr: THANKS! Really?**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! **_

"Grrr… (Bites hand)"

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! It's another pony reference. Okay, I'll fit it in. Oh god, not the door! Knew what? Song is going in. Next kiss, you'll have to wait. I thought so.**_

_**Shadowcharmerdemon: THANKS! Calm down, the actual story ain't over yet! Eh, I'll explain. Go ahead, I'd love to see this on Youtube! Yes. (Hands Grace a large pink hair bow) Go ahead. Nah, I couldn't think of a good song.**_

I am NOT in love with Bakura! He is only my ally!

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! Kemo actually appeared earlier. Or, you could lock him in the closet with Melvin again…**_

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS! **_

(sniff) Really?

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

Fangirl Ghost: Well, now… (whistles) Attack!

(Brainwashed Bakura tackles Angelucie)

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS! Don't worry, he'll be better.**_

_**Marilynjayfreak: THANKS! I'm updating it now!**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Two Is Better Than One is owned by Boys Like Girls. The Italian Opening to Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Giorgio Vanni. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is owned by Lauren Faust. eBay is owned by Pierre Omidyar.**_

_Vivi in un presenti magico vincente,_

_Super sorprendente Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_Entri un passato monzaviato,_

_Che ti e risvegliato adesso Yu-Gi-Oh…_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (That's your name!)_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (Play the game!)_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (It's your move!)_

Yami and Joey stood in front of the storage center where Bill was supposedly hiding out. Joey asked, "So, Yug'… what's da plan?"

Yami pulled out the list. "First, we need to get a store mannequin, according to this step."

After pulling a mannequin out of Hammerspace, it was set outside of the entrance, where a security guard was standing. When he spotted the mannequin, the security guard went up to it, and said, "Hello, gorgeous."

The security guard was too busy flirting with the mannequin to notice Yami and Joey sneak in to the storage center. Yami turned to Joey, and told him, "Okay. Now that we're in here, we need to find pennies. Bill probably has a million Target employees guarding this Ra-forsaken place. We're going to glue the pennies to the floor and distract them."

They got to work, gluing a multitude of coins to the floor. Soon, all of the employees (except for Cathy the Cashier) tried to pick up the pennies. Frank commented, "Theeeeeseeee aaaaareeee heeeeaaaaavy."

The two made it down several flights of stairs. Yami got a flashlight, and held it over the list. "Okay… now the list says that we need to swap something for a cheap knockoff. We need a key to open the door in front of us."

While Cathy was napping, Joey came in and carefully took off the keys, swapping them for a bunch of plastic baby keys. On the way out, he accidentally tripped, screaming, "NYEEEH!" This woke up Cathy.

Cathy asked, "Okay, what are you-"

_**MIND CRUSH!**_

Cathy fell to the ground. Joey looked behind him to see Yami. They went up to the door, and Yami opened it with the keys, only to have Marik jump out and tackle him.

"Holy frig," Marik yelled, "I'm alive! I don't know how many days that friggin' traitor locked me in there!"

Yami pushed Marik off of himself, and stood up. "That's nice, but we have to go find Bakura."

Soon, the three of them were attempting to navigate the storage center. They crossed dark hallways, looked through closet doors, crawled through storage rooms, and saw some strange things.

Marik picked up a My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic DVD and asked, "Can I keep this?"

"No." Yami then announced, "We've been looking for that Ra-forsaken thief for too long. Why is he so _BLEEP!_ing hard to find?"

That question soon became meaningless as a shadowy figure grabbed Marik's arm and began to drag him away. Yami immediately yelled, "Quickly, Joey! Use Tackle!"

Joey yelled his name several times as he jumped on the shadowy figure, and held up the flashlight, revealing him to be Bakura.

Marik slapped Bakura in the face, and yelled, "You **EFF!**ing traitor! Why did you **EFF!**ing kidnap me?"

Bakura smiled wickedly, and replied, "Bill told me so."

Marik crossed his arms, and replied, "Fluffy, you're scaring me."

"It's the bloody truth. And I'm sure that we'll never work together again."

In response, Marik grabbed a random guitar. Joey asked, "Is he going to sing?"

"Yes."

_I remember what you wore on the first day,_

_You came into my life and I thought hey,_

_you know, this could be something._

_'Cause everything you do and words you say,_

_You know that it all takes my breath away,_

_And now I'm left with nothing._

_So maybe it's true that I can't live without you,_

_And maybe two is better than one,_

_But there's so much time to figure out the rest of my life,_

_And you've already got me coming undone,_

_And I'm thinking two is better than one!_

Bakura blinked, and then asked, "Marik, what the bloody hell just happened?"

Marik cried, "FLUFFY!" and hugged Bakura.

However, the celebration soon ended when Bill arrived. He said, "HEY! What are all of you doing here?"

Marik asked in response, "What the frig did you do to Fluffy?"

Bill replied, "I bought this cheap knockoff of the Millennium Rod on eBay the other day. Then, _he _wasn't being loyal, so I took it for a test run."

Marik gasped, and yelled, "How dare you! I'm the only one who is allowed to have the Millennium Rod!" And soon, they started sword fighting. With the Millennium Rods.

After a while, Yami raised his hand, and boomed:

_**MIND CRUSH!**_

Bill was knocked out. Marik stared at the unconscious body, and yelled, "Let's get the frig out of here!"

Yami asked, "You realize that this doesn't change anything, don't you?"

"YES!"

_**And now for the stinger…**_

_ You thought she was gone…_

A shadow woman laughed evilly.

_You thought that our heroes were rid of her antics…_

Marik gasped in complete shock, while Bakura noted in a deadpan manner, "Oh bugger."

_Now, get ready for Chapter 50…_

The shadowy figure inched closer to the screen.

_ And the return of…_

What was seen of the figure now was a shadowy girl in pink clothing.

_ THE FANGIRL GHOST!_

The Fangirl Ghost smirked, and said, "You really thought that an anime reference would destroy me?"

Marik replied, "But that reference was foolproof! How the frig did you return?"

_ She's back in Chapter 50… which is, like, two chapters from now._

_** Apparently, one of my friends thinks that the Fangirl Ghost looks like the T-Mobile girl. And sorry that this did not get posted sooner; I am really busy these days.**_


	49. In Which Melvin and Marik Talk

_** Heads up! The elaborate traps that Yami and Joey set in the beginning of last chapter were really Numbers 139 – 141! I don't own the list, by the way, and you all have my permission to tell your friends and spread the news. Now, you know the drill: COMMENTS!**_

_**PhilThePersonaGuy: THANKS! I'll make it an opening song.**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! **_

It's a cheap knockoff of a guitar. I got it from the cheap knockoff guy that Bill bought the fake Rod from.

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! A friend gave me the ideas. Yes, he is.**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS!**_

"Don't you dare flatter me."

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! Why did you list Bakura twice?**_

_**DragonsFlame17: THANKS! Go ahead! :) Remember, these may get you kicked out, though.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! **_

Of course I am!

_**Maximumride123: THANKS! Yeah, Rainbow Dash! Everything's 20% cooler with her!**_

_**MyFalseTruth: THANKS! But not today!**_

_**FangandIggyRule: THANKS! (hands one over) Spice Girls are a pop group. A British pop group.**_

_**IrresistibleAshGirl: THANKS! But it's for his training for when he becomes a motorcycle-riding cop from the future!  
><strong>_

_**Milleniummonkey23: THANKS! I'll do that.**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! And thanks for the review of Sparks Fly.**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! You could say that. :) Actually, I have something else in mind. I thought that the Leviathan was a dragon, not a fish!**_

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! Is this it? (hands over sheet of paper)**_

_**Vampiressbeauty20: THANKS! I am, I am!**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS!**_

F.G.: (kidnaps Angelucie) Now… who will stop me? Come, Bakura. We have to find your Egyptian friend.

Brainwashed Bakura: (kisses F.G.'s hand) Yes, mistress.

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS!**_

"I was bloody brainwashed!"

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Twilight is owned by Stephanie Meyer. The Italian Opening to Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Giorgio Vanni.**_

_Vivi in un presenti magico vincente,_

_Super sorprendente Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_Entri un passato monzaviato,_

_Che ti e risvegliato adesso Yu-Gi-Oh…_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (That's your name!)_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (Play the game!)_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (It's your move!)_

Marik cried, "It's good to have you back, Bakura!" In a moment of pure ecstasy, he bounded around the room, throwing confetti over Bakura. The latter frowned, but was truly happy on the inside. Of course, he wasn't about to reveal this development.

So, the Marikmobile pulled into Target. Bakura pulled out the list, and read, "Number 142: Put women's clothes into men's carts."

Soon, Marik returned, carrying a bunch of dresses. He told Bakura, "Now, we need to find the perfect victims." And then, he had an idea. 

Soon, Joey went up to Duke. He pulled out a pink tutu from his own cart, and asked, "Did ya do dis to me?"

Duke responded, (with theme music) "Why would I also do it to myself?" And as he spoke, Duke drew out a blue sailor dress.

Cleverly hidden behind a shelf, Marik burst out in laughter, while Bakura crossed off the step, and read, "Number 143: Put preppy stuff, like short skirts and whatnot, into old men's carts when they aren't looking."

Yugi was browsing in his cart, when he found several plaid pink skirts in his own cart. He yelled, "Grandpa! What did I tell you about buying these?"

Grandpa replied, "I didn't do it!"

"Grandpa," Yugi reassured him, "You need rest. Lots of it."

As Grandpa Moto was lead out of the store by Yugi, Bakura drew out the list, and read, "Number 144: Run around in front of a mirror screaming, "COPYCAT!"

Marik went up to a mirror, and looked at his refection. A cheesy grin appeared, and Marik waved to his reflection, which said reflection did in response. Marik yelled, "Holy frig! It's a copycat!"

Suddenly, the reflection changed. Its hair spiked upwards, eyes blanked out, and the Eye of Horus materialized on its forehead. Marik flipped out, and yelled, "Melvin, you're blocking my friggin' reflection."

Melvin found this amusing, and said, "Hello, Hikari. I'm surprised that this is only the first time we've had a full conversation face to face ever since you were a minor. But first! I have one request."

Marik responded with, "Make it snappy. I have somewhere else to be."

Melvin spread his arms out, and asked, "Could I get a hug?"

Marik yelled, "Frig no! I would rather be alive for the fangirls, you know!"

Before Melvin could say anything, a knife broke the glass, and in effect, the mirror. Marik turned around to see Bakura standing there. The former stomped over to Bakura, and slapped him in the face. Then, Marik screamed, "What the frig? Don't you know that breaking a mirror is bad luck? What are you trying to do, **EFF!**ing kill yourself?"

Suddenly, the store darkened, and tendrils of smoke rose from the ground. Out of the tendrils came a young woman in a pink dress. Her body seemed to be made out of a shadowy material.

Marik grabbed Bakura's arm, and yelled, "See? This is what happens when you break a **EFF!**ing mirror!"

The woman asked, "You really forgot who I was?"

Bakura replied, "Well, it was several chapters since your last appearance…"

"SILENCE!" The woman stared across at the two shivering men before her. "I think it's time for a little reminder," the woman said. She pointed her finger dramatically, and boomed, "I AM THE FANGIRL GHOST!"

Marik gasped in complete shock, while Bakura noted in a deadpan manner, "Oh bugger."

The Fangirl Ghost smirked, and said, "You really thought that an anime reference would destroy me?"

Marik replied, "But that reference was foolproof! How the frig did you return?"

The Fangirl Ghost said, "That's not important." She continued with, "So I hear that you're a couple now. Am I right?" When she got no answer, she yelled, "I said: AM I RIGHT?"

Marik cried, "Where the frig did you get that from? That was only once!"

"Once is enough for me," the ghost said. As she melted away into the tendrils, she told them, "Come back tomorrow, and I will show you the true extent of my powers." And with that, she disappeared into the shadows.

The two exchanged glances, and left.

_**And now for the stinger!**_

Marik followed Bakura deeper into the forest. He grabbed Bakura's arm, and cried, "You're impossibly fast, and strong. Your skin is pale white and ice cold. You don't go out in the sunlight. I know what you really are."

Bakura's eyes locked onto Marik's, and he harshly told him, "Don't you dare say it."

After a moment of silence, Marik told him, "You're a Yami."

Bakura asked, "You're not afraid, are you?"

Marik yelled, "Frig no!"

_**RINGLIGHT: COMING NEVER – THANK GOD!**_

_**(LINE BREAK)**_

Melvin yelled from the broken mirror shards, "I am not done with this conversation, Binky Boy!" Suddenly, Frank came over with a dustpan and broom, and began sweeping up the shards. Melvin screamed, "What the frig are you doing?" Frank screamed like a girl, and shambled away.

_**Ladies and gentlemen, I hate Twilight. So, why did I parody it? Because I felt like it. Next time, the Fangirl Ghost.**_


	50. In Which the Fangirl Ghost is Defeated

_** I'm going to be on hiatus for a while after this. I don't own the list, and please tell your friends about this. Now to respond to the comments.**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! **_

Melvin: Okay! (Pulls out Rod from behind back)

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! Yeah, Stephanie Meyer is Tara Gilesbie in comparison to the awesomeness that is Harry Potter!**_

_**Maximumride123: THANKS! Because she just is. Eeyup.**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! In your review of Chapter 48. Woah wait. You like Twilight? (Crawls into the fetal position and cries self to sleep.) Nah, just kidding. Your opinion, I can't change it!**_

_**PhilThePersonaGuy: THANKS! Again: Uninstall. It will be an opening music thing.**_

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS! Movie theaters to see Breaking Dawn, probably.**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! **_

NO! There are other counterfeit Rods?

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! I never realized how many people would like that. O _ o**_

_**FangandIggyRule: THANKS! Good point there.**_

_**DragonsFlame17: THANKS! Why? Here comes teh awesomeness!**_

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! I already have something. XD It involves a certain over-referenced show in this.**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! That's the only way that you CAN burn a witch. Ooh, how is your new pet? Can I poke it?**_

Five Year Old: And then Marik said, "I love you, Bakura." And then Bakura said, "I love you, Marik." And then, Marik said, "I love you too, Bakura." And then Bakura said…

_**Apologies to 5 year olds everywhere!**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! Tell more. Please?**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS! (Cues the Indiana Jones theme)**_

Marik: Let's start! Come on, Evilucie! TO RAINBOW DASH!

Sailorblaze: I really don't get paid enough for this.

_**Ammypaint16: THANKS! (Squees)**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! Down with the sparklepires!**_

"(Growls)"

_** Everyone's sanity is unraveling… (Including the authoress, possibly.)**_

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! But what about TV Tropes? I've been waiting so damn long for my page! WHY, SCAE? Whyyyyyy? (Cries) Ahem. Anyway, this IS Chapter 50! (Sings Dynamite)**_

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. The Italian Theme to Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Giorgio Vanni. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is owned by Lauren Faust. Paraboss is owned by CardGamesFTW, Shadyvox, and TheAzureCrow. The last stinger is owned by Tomska.**_

_Vivi in un presenti magico vincente,_

_Super sorprendente Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_Entri un passato monzaviato,_

_Che ti e risvegliato adesso Yu-Gi-Oh…_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (That's your name!)_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (Play the game!)_

_Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh! (It's your move!)_

That morning, Marik struggled over to the Marikmobile, carrying a giant box. Why was Marik carrying a giant box? You'll know by the end of the chapter.

Bakura asked, "Marik, what the bloody hell are you carrying?"

Marik yelled back, "I have no friggin' idea! Maybe it's that bicycle I wanted when I was ten!"

Bakura sighed as Marik slid in next to him. It was December, after all. This month, it would be Christmas, and boy oh boy, Marik was going to be sending him some unneeded crap this year.

At Target, Bakura pulled out the list, and read, "Number 145: Bring a friend and a stopwatch. Get carts and race around. Every time you knock something over, subtract a second from your time. You usually get kicked out before you figure out who won."

_**Soon…**_

"Okay," Bakura said, "Marik, are you ready?"

Marik gave a thumbs up, and sped off. After a while, he came back, with a whole ton of destruction trailing from behind him. Bakura's eyes widened. "Marik…"

"Yes?"

Bakura replied, "Nothing," and crossed off Number 145. Then, he read, "Number 146: Find a couple. Run up to the one who is an opposite gender from you, slap them, and say, 'What is this? I thought what we had was special!'"

Soon, Marik had spied Tea and Yami, who were strolling along. 

"Thanks for taking me to Target, Yami," Tea cheered, "This is the best date EVER!"

Yami sighed. "The only thing that I don't understand is why we keep returning here!"

Suddenly, Marik appeared, slapped Tea, and yelled, "The frig? I thought that there was something special between us!"

Tea was too stunned to begin a friendship speech. Yami took a cue, and backed away slowly.

Marik, who was satisfied, returned to Bakura. He crossed off the step, and read, "Number 147: Go up to an assistant and ask for mayonnaise. When they say they don't have it, start crying and scream, 'Now how am I supposed to paint my toenails?'"

Marik went up to Frank and asked, "Could I have some mayonnaise please?"

Frank handed Marik a jar of mayo, and said, "Heeeeereeee yoooooouuuuu goooooo."

Marik took one look at the jar of mayo, and said, "Huh. That wasn't supposed to happen!" Suddenly, he turned around, and Bakura was standing behind him. Marik happily cheered, "FLUFFY!"

Bakura walked up to Marik, and stared at him. Marik gulped when he noticed that everyone's favorite bishounen kitty's eyes were about as lifeless as a cup of sugar.

Marik screamed, "NO! I just freed you from Mind Control about two friggin' chapters ago! You can't be Mind Controlled again! NOT NOW!"

Evil laughter resonated through the store, and the Fangirl Ghost materialized behind Marik. She whispered, "Well, Marik, it looks like your friend is on my side now. Isn't that right, sweetheart?"

Bakura replied in an eerie flat monotone, "Yes, oh great and powerful Fangirl Ghost."

Marik could not believe what was happening at that moment. He watched in sheer horror as the Fangirl Ghost wrapped Bakura in a shadowy embraced, and began to kiss him. In a fit of pure Egyptian Rage, Marik threw the Millennium Rod at the Fangirl Ghost, and then picked it up.

"Foolish fool," Marik scolded, "I'm the only one allowed to kiss him like that!" Suddenly, Yami, Serenity, Joey, and Mai ran over.

"Holy Ra," Yami pointed out, "It's a ghost!"

Joey continued with, "A Fangirl Ghost!"

Bakura stood up, and asked Marik, "Okay. Now what the bloody hell are we going to do?"

Just as Marik was about to answer the question, the box from earlier came floating over, and opened itself. Marik and Bakura peered in.

"Holy frig, Fluffy," Marik said in awe, "It's the Elements of Harmony!"

Bakura took one look at them, and asked, "What are we supposed to do with them?"

Marik grabbed out the necklace representing the Element of Laughter, and replied, "Hand them out to everyone!"

Bakura sighed, and handed the other four necklaces to Yami, Joey, Serenity, and Mai, who happily cheered, "This will definitely be appealing for the fanboys!"

Bakura took out the last object, a shiny tiara. He asked Marik, "Are you sure that I'm supposed to wear this?"

Marik slammed the tiara on his head. Then, he sung:

_We're gonna beat you, oh Fangirl Ghost,_

_No doubt about it, you're friggin' toast!_

Bakura explained to the Fangirl Ghost, "As far as people like you go in fanfiction of anime, I hate to tell you, you're a bloody cliché."

Yami immediately understood what was happening, and sung:

_That's right, you've messed with the wrong show,_

_We're not just anyone: We're Yu-Gi-Oh!_

As a giant rainbow beam fired at the fangirl ghost, everyone sung:

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh,_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh,_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh,_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh,_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh,_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh,_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh,_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh,_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_We're Yu-Gi-Oh!_

_WE'RE YU-GI-OH!_

As the Fangirl Ghost faced her inevitable doom, she screamed, "NO! I'll be back! You just wait and see!" And in the blink of an eye, she and the Elements of Harmony were gone.

Bakura stated, "Well, we're clearly running out of bloody ideas."

_**And now for the stinger!**_

_Somewhere in the hospital…_

A hospital matron came up to Bill, and said, "Sir, you appeared to have your mind briefly stop working. I'm glad to report that you'll be out in no time!"

Bill grumbled, "Good."

_**(LINE BREAK)**_

Somewhere in Ryou's soul room, Ryou asked, "Um, excuse me, but why haven't I appeared in the last few chapters?"

_**(LINE BREAK)**_

"Vivian," Yami asked, "Why in the name of Ra is my hikari on fire?" He pointed to Yugi, who was just as surprised as he was.

In response, Vivian screamed, "BUY ME MORE JEWELRY!"

_** I don't know why I didn't put the last stinger in earlier. So anyway, we're nearly halfway done with this! W to the O-O-T! So, just keep swimming, review, and believe in stuff! I will probably return next Thursday. Not this Thursday, but next Thursday. I hope that's okay with you. And yes, that was how they defeated her. I know it's sinful, but I love the Paraboss song!**_


	51. In Which Hot Dogs Are Murderous

_** I'm baaaaack… and I still don't own the list! By the way, we still need to spread the news, and alert LK of our existence. Now, time to answer the busload of reviews that I got while I went on hiatus!**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! That makes me feel somewhat better… It's my favorite song from the movie! And no, you didn't miss a thing. It's another MLP reference. (Cue booing) I know, I reference it too much!**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! Yeah, but the others had to wear pretty necklaces… although the shiny tiara is way girlier.**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! Justin Bieber? (Takes out Bazooka) **_

_**Milleniummonkey23: THANKS! I did. Twice.**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! That's why I put the 'Buy Me More Jewelry' thing there.**_

_**Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Excuse me, but what was that about Stronger?**_

NO! Don't murder me!

_**Seabreeze27: THANKS! No, they've been around ever since the first rainstorm.**_

_**Raspberry 14: THANKS! That reference took the cake, and probably ate it too! I know, but I'm back now!**_

_**Maximumride123: THANKS! Let me guess… it was either the smile Pinkie made when she saw the Sonic Rainboom as a filly, or Rainbow Dash's 'so awesome' expression. OMG, I did? I have pleased Rainbow Dash! (Knocks on the Herd's door) Yo, herd! I'm a pegasister! Can I please be welcomed?**_

_**FangandIggyRule: THANKS! It's somewhere on the Internet. Yeah. Believe me, that was hard to think of a word that rhymed with 'Ghost'.**_

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! And it contained magical ponies and rainbows!**_

_**Vampiressbeauty20: THANKS! Wait, you like Twilight? And don't worry; I think that she's gone for good.**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! I forgot. Being away from this for so long does that to you sometimes.**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS! **_

BLK: Meow ma meow!

Sailorblaze: Wait a moment; the Elements of Harmony are in the Mane 6! How could they have been destroyed?

_**Bloody Rabbit Alice: THANKS! I haven't decided when Ryou would return. Sorry about that.**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! **_

_**Phoenix: Aw man!**_

_**Emichan: THANKS!**_

Holy frig! Applejack was in Generation 1, but not Pinkie?

_**Yeah, it was. But hey, it was fitting for the moment… the AWESOME MOMENT!**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! And I set fire to the rain!**_

OKAY!

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! Le gasp! NOT THE TROPES OF TV! And yup, it's Paraboss!**_

_**DarkMagicianMidget: THANKS! You can wake up now. Well, Marik broke the Fangirl Ghost's concentration by throwing the M. Rod at her head… I don't get it either. Yeah, Friendship is – wait a minute! Don't go Yuma on me! And what the hell is trumoo?**_

_**Marilynjayfreak: THANKS! She was.**_

_**Shadowcharmerdemon: THANKS! I missed you guys. And Grace, here's a whole box of glittery pink ribbons. They are for your fluffy kitty.**_

_**YamiNoGamer69: THANKS! Woah! I'm considered a goddess by somebody! HOLY FREAKIN' CRAP! **_

"Thank you! You don't know how many bloody reviewers say that I am!"

…Who the frig is Maddie?

_** Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Gives You Hell is owned by the All American Rejects. Animal Farm is owned by George Orwell (those who can find the reference to it gets a free cookie!). You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch is owned by Dr. Seuss. A Christmas Carol is owned by Charles Dickens.**_

_When you see my face,_

_Hope it gives you hell,_

_Hope it gives you hell_

_When you walk my way,_

_Hope it gives you hell,_

_Hope it gives you hell_

_If you find a man that's worth a damn and treats you well,_

_Then he's a fool you're just as well,_

_Hope it gives you hell!_

"BAKURA!"

Bakura groaned, and asked, "Marik, what is wrong now?"

Marik replied, "The theme song! IT CHANGED! Again!"

Bakura sighed. Of course Marik would fret about the theme music. However, his thoughts were interrupted by a large jolt.

Marik said, "Well, **EFF!** The **EFF!**ing car broke down! Now how the **EFF!** are we going to get to **EFF!**ing Target?"

Soon, Bakura and Odion were struggling to push the car forward, with Marik sitting on the car roof. Odion asked, "Master Marik, aren't you going to help us?"

Marik yelled, "No!"

Soon, through strained muscles and sore limbs, the duo was able to finally arrive at Target. Bakura pulled out the list, and read, "Number 148: Lay on the floor and do a ground angel."

Soon, Marik ran out into the middle of the store, and laid down on the ground. Suddenly, he started flapping his arms around, and made a ground angel.

Mokuba saw that, and told Kaiba, "That looks like fun! Can I join?"

"No," Kaiba said in a deadpan manner.

Soon, Marik stood up, and returned to Bakura. The latter crossed off Number 148, and read, "Number 149: Steal their ketchup, go on the counter, smear ketchup all over yourself, and say, 'Help me! Help me! OMG! The hot dog killed me!' This is just bloody ridiculous, and possibly even more than you, Marik."

Marik replied, "It looks evilly fun to me, Fluffy!"

Soon, Tea and Tristan were walking in the store. Suddenly, Marik was on the ground, screaming, "Holy frig! Somebody help me! The hot dog murdered me!"

Tristan grabbed the hot dog he was eating, and yelled, "Die, hot dog!"

Tea pleaded, "No, don't kill the hot dog! He was your friend! Friends don't kill other friends! It's in one of the rules of the Seven Commandments of Animalism!"

The two people arguing didn't notice Marik slip away. He returned to Bakura, and grumbled, "Well, thanks a friggin' lot! My clothes are ruined! Ruined, I say! RUINED!"

Bakura rolled his eyes, and read, "Number 150: Start jumping on one of their beds, and attempt to fall asleep until one guy tells you to get off. Then yell, 'Hey, what are you doing here? Get out of my house! Get away from my bed!'"

Yugi was alone in the store this time, happily buying trading cards, when he spotted Marik sleeping on a random bed. He walked over, and pointed out, "Malik, this is a store, not a hotel…"

At once, Marik woke up, and yelled, "Get the frig out of my house!"

Yugi replied, "But this isn't your house!"

Marik yelled back, "I DON'T FRIGGIN' CARE!"

Yugi stormed off. When Marik and Bakura got back to the store, Bakura asked, "Marik, how are we going to get home?"

Marik cried, "Look! Public Transportation!" And so, they took the bus.

_**And now for the stingers!**_

_You're a vile one, manager,_

_You really are a jerk._

_You're as generous as a thief king,_

_And as friendly as dirt,_

_Manager!_

_And don't think that I can't see that,_

_Villainous smirk!_

**_(LINE BREAK)_**

_ You've heard the tale…_

"Christmas… BAH HUMBUG!"

_You've witnessed the magic…_

"Listen, Scrooge. Tonight, you shall be visited by three spirits…"

_Now prepare for yet another reimagining of this story…_

Frank pleaded, "Buuuut siiiir… Iiiiit's Chriiiiistmaaaaas!"

Bill replied, "Frank, does it look like I give a damn about Christmas? If you don't come to work tomorrow, then you're fired!

_ Based on the classic tale by Charles Dickens…_

Joey yelled, "Man, dat manager really hates Christmas!"

Marik declared, "Something must be done!"

_Now, prepare to watch the exact same things happen all over again!_

Yami declared, "Listen, you Ra forsaken manager! Tonight, three spirits will visit you! Listen to them, or else!"

Bill asked, "Or else what?"

Yami replied, "Look, how am I supposed to know? They'll whack you on the head with something!"

_Sailorblaze and Monochrome Cow Productions Present…_

_The Marik and Bakura: 333 Ways Christmas Special: Not Another Christmas Carol_

_This December_

_** Well, that's the first look at the Christmas Special, folks! And for surviving 50 chapters of this, you all get a free cookie! (And the one who can spot the Animal Farm reference will get another one.) Until next time!**_

_**~ Sailorblaze**_


	52. In Which A Play Is Performed

**_Greetings peoples! I don't own this list, and you guys have my permission to spread the news. Now, it's time to answer… DA COMMENTS! And since so many people found the reference, FREE COOKIES FOR ALL!_**

**_Ryoubakura98: THANKS! You said that it was better than Paraboss._**

Melvin: But if you kill me, than I shall become stronger than ever!

**_Zukofan2005: THANKS! But I thought that you loved the Bakuras! Yes; it's the chapter after this one!_**

**_Maximumride123: THANKS! Wow, that is the ultimate compliment! So, I'm not going to be welcomed to the Herd?_**

**_PrankK1ng: THANKS! Eeyup._**

**_PhilthePersonaGuy: THANKS! (high fives back)_**

**_Vampiressbeauty20: THANKS! I agree, but when I read Twilight, I thought that it was sappy and that Bella was a Mary Sue._**

**_BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! I'll send him some Gummy Bears._**

**_Lonewolfgirl - sademo588: THANKS! Darn it, I knew that I should have made a more subtle reference! Oh yeah! That's right._**

**_Avalongal316: THANKS! Waitamoment… CUPCAKES?_**

Cupcakes? Well, if it has ponies, I want to read it!

_An hour later…_

WHAT THE FRIG DID I JUST READ?

**_FangandIggyRule: THANKS! Bakura, Bakura, Bakura!_**

**_MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! I shouldn't have noted it in the end. Derp._**

**_: THANKS! Eeyup._**

**_Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! You'll see next chapter, but yeah, Bill is Scrooge._**

**_Shadowcharmerdemon: THANKS! Oh, that makes sense. Grace, WHY U SO ADORABLE?_**

**_Marilynjayfreak: THANKS! Here it is!_**

**_Scaevola2: THANKS! Well, I was busy that week, so I kind of Leeroy Jenkins'd into the chapter and threw some crap together. AF ref was when Tea was stopping Tristan from attacking his hot dog. Read the review of the last chapter by lonewolfgirl - sademo588 to see where it was. Okay; I will!_**

**_YamiNoGamer69: THANKS! Oh, I remember now! You cameo'd in one of Zilla's reviews in a previous chapter! No, Melvin's a murderous sunflower._**

**_ScarletBlackberry of the M.B.S.: THANKS! All out? Okay then… Ryou will cameo this chapter. My favorite? 'No animal shall kill another animal.' It leads up to the goriest part of the book. OMG, I have read Cupcakes. AND I LIVED._**

****Why are you pelting me with Rainbow Dash? Do you have any aversion to parties, cupcakes, and Pinkie?

**_Nameless Sky: THANKS! Well, hold on; this will pass number 100!_**

**_Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Gives You Hell is owned by All American Rejects. Till The World Ends is owned by Britney Spears. Yakety Sax is owned by James Q. Rich._**

_When you see my face,_

_Hope it gives you hell,_

_Hope it gives you hell_

_When you walk my way,_

_Hope it gives you hell,_

_Hope it gives you hell_

_If you find a man that's worth a damn and treats you well,_

_Then he's a fool you're just as well,_

_Hope it gives you hell!_

"So, Marik," Bakura asked, as he squeezed into his chair in the theater, "Why exactly are we here instead of Target today?"

Marik jumped into the seat next to him, and yelled "Are you friggin' kidding me? This theater company is putting on a play! About _our _escapades at Target!"

Bakura sighed. "Marik, are you sure that this won't be a bloody flop?"

"Hush, little kitty. The show's starting!"

Soon, the curtain in the theater rose, and revealed a bare stage. Everyone started clapping, except Bakura, who facepalmed.

Suddenly, an actress walked onto the stage, and sat herself on a stool. "Hello, everyone," she greeted, "I am the narrator of this story, and today, I have a story to tell. Now, where did I put it?" After fumbling around, the narrator pulled out a small book. "Ah, here it is," she said, and opened it to a certain page. "Now, today's story is about two young men who screw up in a department store."

Suddenly, a woman's voice from offstage yelled, "Hey, Baaaakura!"

Marik indignantly commented, "What? They couldn't get an actual man to play me?" Bakura couldn't help but snicker at this unfortunate detail.

Soon, a couch rolled onto the stage, where a young man wearing a long, white wig was reading a book that said: **Stealing Powerful Egyptian Artifacts for Morons**. Then, a woman who looked almost like Marik walked onto the stage.

Marik screamed, "Her shirt is not sufficiently midriff baring enough for my tastes! And that, my good kitty, is one detail that any people dressed as me should **EFF!** up!"

The woman that was playing Marik screamed, "BAKURA! I have found a list that will help us finally defeat that foolish fool that calls himself 'the Pharaoh'!" She then pulled out a long, long, long list, and threw it at 'Bakura'.

'Bakura' read it, and said, "Marik, I am not going to bloody do this! It will ruin my reputation!"

Bakura cringed at how out of character he was in the play. 'Marik' continued with, "But Bakura! If we do this list, then the Pharaoh shall be humiliated, and we will be victorious against him! He shall be forced to admit defeat!"

'Bakura' rolled his eyes, and got up from the couch. As a blackout happened, and the scene changed, the narrator continued with, "So, the duo got into the trusty car, the Marikmobile, and sped off to a store called Wal-Mart."

Marik yelled, "It's Target!"

The narrator continued with, "SO! In Wal-Mart, they got down to business."

The lights came up, revealing the actor and actress in 'Wal-Mart'. 'Bakura' drew out the list, and read, 'Number 151: Run around switching all of the open signs on the cash registers to closed and all of the closed signs to open. Watch the customers get confused."

Bakura asked, "Shouldn't they be starting at Number 1?"

Marik replied, "But the number has 1 in it!"

"Marik, that is not the same thing."

****Soon, it showed the two running around, switching the signs, confusing many customers. Then, the narrator narrated, "But one thing wasn't enough for them. No, you see, they agreed that each day, not one, not two, but THREE things would be done each day."

'Bakura' pulled out the list again, and read, "Number 152: Ask for goat milk."

Then, the scene changed, to reveal a man dressed as an Ancient Egyptian pharaoh pushing a shopping cart. He was wearing a puzzle piece painted metallic gold. This man declared, "I am Yami, the spirit of an ancient Egyptian pharaoh. With my Millennium Puzzle," he continued, motioning to the gold jigsaw puzzle piece around his neck, "I have unlimited power!"

Bakura confessed, "Okay, that's actually sort of funny."

'Marik' ran up to 'Yami', and asked, "May I have some goat milk, please?"

'Yami' snorted, and replied, "I don't have time to deal with you." He raised his hand, and boomed:

**_MIND CRUSH!_**

Suddenly, there were several brightly flashing lights, as 'Marik' collapsed to the floor. Marik blinked, and yelled, "Whoa! Talk about getting a seizure!" Bakura, meanwhile, was startled by the flashing lights so much, he retreated back into the Ring, leaving a confused Ryou behind.

'Bakura' ran onto the stage, and shook 'Marik' awake. He yelled. "Marik! Are you okay?"

'Marik replied, "My head feels so fuzzy. Oh Bakura, I should never have left you!" The actor and the actress started to kiss one another.

Marik's eyes widened. He looked at his shaking hands, and lampshaded, "Holy frig, I feel like I'm reading a bad yaoi fanfic."

Ryou asked, "What? Where the bloody hell am I?"

"Oh, hi Limey."

On stage, the actor and actress finished kissing. The actress pulled out the list from nowhere, and read, "Number 153: Make sure somebody's in the same aisle, then run screaming into a wall. Fall down and say 'AHHH! The pain, the horrible, terrible pain!', until someone asks if you're alright. When they do, get up and say, "Yes, I'm fine, why?" Then, walk away calmly, like nothing happened."

As an actor portraying Frank was restocking the shelves, 'Marik' ran into a wall, and screamed, "Gah! The pain! It feels as if a 100 knives stabbed me at the same time!"

Marik rolled his eyes, and said, "Talk about drama!"

'Frank' went up to 'Marik', and asked, "Are you okay, Ms. Ishtar?"

Marik gasped. "A girl? THEY TURNED ME INTO A FRIGGIN' GIRL? As if making my actress female wasn't humiliating enough, they feel a need to make me an actual female too? WHAT THE FRIG, DIRECTOR?" And with that, Marik stood up, and stomped out of the theater.

Ryou shrugged, sat back in his seat, and watched the rest of the play. He left early too, however, when they had made a scene based on the first time he met Melvin.

**_And now for the stinger!_**

(Montage of everything hilarious that has ever happened at Target and this fanfic to 'Yakety Sax')

**_(LINE BREAK)_**

On a stage filled with tap dancing background people, juggling monkeys, and silver confetti rain, Marik sung:

_I can't take it, take it, take no more!_

_Never felt like, felt like this before,_

_Come on get me, get me on the floor!_

_DJ what you, what you waiting for?_

_Woah oh oh oh oh oh ohhh!_

_Woah oh oh oh oh oh ohhh!_

_Woah oh oh oh oh oh ohhh!_

_Woah oh oh oh oh oh ohhh!_

_Woah oh oh oh oh oh ohhh!_

_Woah oh oh oh oh oh ohhh!_

_Woah oh oh oh oh oh ohhh!_

_Woah oh oh oh oh oh ohhh!_

**_Christmas special. Next chapter. 'Nuff said. So, in case anybody got confused, they were watching a play based off of the first 10 chapters of this fanfic. Does that make more sense? Hopefully. :3_**

**_~ Sailorblaze_**


	53. Not Another Christmas Carol!

**_LADIES AND GENTS! It's time… FOR THE CHRISTMAS SPECIAL! I don't own the list, and go ahead! Spread the damn news! But now, let's take a look at the comments! Also, the events of the past in this chapter were partly thought up by the lovely BlackRoseDragonCK. Let's give her a hand!_**

**_Phil The Persona Guy: THANKS! _**

"I'm bloody sure that he won't."

**_PrankK1ng: THANKS! True… it left a hole in the 4th wall. I have yet to fix it._**

**_Ryoubakura98: THANKS! Paraboss is boss! (And BTW, in Love at First Sight: I meant the reason this way: Maybe Ryou is also different from the boys in his village, like Yugi, but his village is not as accepting as Yugi's village is. I didn't mean to put it so bluntly.)_**

Melvin: Try me, Binky Boy!

**_Vampiressbeauty20: THANKS! YAY! Death to the Mary Sue!_**

**_Maximumride123: THANKS! Oh my gosh! Thank you! (Brohoof)_**

**_BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! I'm sure it's at the book store!_**

**_Zukofan2005: Oh, I see. HERE IT IS!_**

**_MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! I want a legit play. Strange, I thought you would freak out because of him not looking like himself._**

**_Marilynjayfreak: THANKS! They did. Truthfully, he had it coming._**

**_Scaevola2: THANKS! Yeah! People, important stuff: Scae needs your help on the TV Tropes page! Drop her a PM if you have an account on that site! Sure, I'll have that happen at some point._**

**_FangandIggyRule: THANKS! Alas, poor Butt Monkey - err, Bishounen! I meant Bishounen! _**

EXCUSE ME?

**_Arietta Fentom - Phantom: THANKS! Sure, I'll add you in at one point._**

**_Shadowcharmerdemon: THANKS! Oh, I see. Here it is, but no Mistletoe._**

**_ScarletBlackberry of the M.B.S.: THANKS! Hell yeah, I survived Cupcakes. I also survived Sweet Apple Massacre and Rainbow Factory! _**

"What the bloody hell do you want?"

**_Angelucie: THANKS! No hard feelings!_**

Marik Clone: I hate Pinkie Pie.

Marik: You monster!

**_Lonewolfgirl - sademo588: THANKS! I see. Wow, if a person who hasn't read Animal Farm can notice the reference, then I'm really a derp._**

**_Begecko: THANKS! Okay…_**

**_Begecko: THANKS! I'll fix the lyrics at one point._**

**_Begecko: THANKS! :)_**

**_Yu-Gi-Oh is owned by Kazuki Takahashi. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged is owned by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW. Carol of the Bells is owned by Mykola Leontovych. A Christmas Carol is owned by Charles Dickens. My Little Pony is owned by Hasbro. Portal is owned by Valve. Still Alive is owned by Jonathan Coulton. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is owned by Lauren Faust._**

_Gaily they ring_

_while people sing_

_Songs of good cheer_

_christmas is here!_

_Merry, merry, merry, merry christmas!_

_Merry, merry, merry, merry christmas!_

_Sailorblaze and Monochrome Cow Productions Present…_

_The Marik and Bakura: 333 Ways Christmas Special_

_NOT ANOTHER CHRISTMAS CAROL_

Bill the Manager stomped into his office. It was Christmas Eve, and everyone was pouring into the store for last minute Christmas Shopping. Bill didn't care; to him, Christmas was a huge waste of time. After all, stores everywhere closed that day. They wasted a good day for money making!

Frank, the resident zombie employee, shambled into his office, and said, "Biiiiill, Iiii waaaant toooo taaaalk."

Bill said, "Frank, make this quick. I have to close up for the night."

Frank asked, "Caaaan Iiiii haaaaveeee theeee daaaaay ooooff tooooomooorrooooow?"

Bill replied, "Oh, hell no!"

Frank pleaded, "Buuuut siiiir… Iiiiit's Chriiiiistmaaaaas!"

Bill replied, "Frank, does it look like I give a damn about Christmas?" He walked out of his office, and threatened, "If you don't come to work tomorrow, then you're fired!"

As Bill walked to the intercom, two people got in his way, and started singing:

_We wish you a merry Christmas,_

_We wish you a merry Christmas,_

_We wish you a merry Christmas,_

_and a-_

Bill pushed them out of the way, yelling, "Christmas? BAH HUMBUG!"

The two people - Marik and Joey - looked at each other. Finally, Joey yelled, "Man, dat manager really hates Chistmas!"

Marik nodded, and declared, "Something must be done! Bakura," he said, turning to Bakura, "Do you have any ideas?"

Bakura rolled his eyes, and returned to the book he was reading, which was called _A Christmas Carol_. Marik walked over, and read over his shoulder. The tale of Ebenezer Scrooge seemed to come to life in front of the Egyptian teen's eyes. It also inspired an idea. Marik said, "Furry! Limey! I have an ingenious idea on how to get Bill to like Christmas! Get the Pharaoh, and I shall tell all!"

Bakura sighed, and muttered, "Oh bugger, here we go…"

**_Meanwhile…_**

Bill stomped into the storeroom in the back of Target. After he had closed the store, he got into PJs. Just as he was about to climb into bed, however, footsteps were heard.

Bill cried, "Will you get out of this store? It's closed, for heaven's sakes!"

The storeroom door opened, and a young man with spiky tricolored hair walked in. Bill moaned, "Oh great. It's this person. Hello, Yami."

Yami said, "BILL! Once, I was the king of Ancient Egypt. Then, I was a spirit tortured for his sins. As punishment, the gods gave me a shiny golden necklace to remind me of my fate!" Yami pointed at the Millennium Puzzle as he spoke.

Bill crossly asked, "Look, will you just get to the point already?"

Yami jabbed his finger into Bill's chest, and declared, "Listen, you Ra forsaken manager! Tonight, three spirits will visit you! Listen to them, or else!"

Bill questioned, "Or else what?"

There was an awkward moment of silence. Then, Yami replied, "Look, how am I supposed to know? They'll whack you on the head with something!"

Bill asked, "Will you just leave already?"

Yami walked to the door. Just as he was about to leave, he pointed at Bill, and boomed, "You have been warned!"

Bill facepalmed, and went to sleep.

**_Later that night…_**

Bill was brought back to consciousness by a figure jumping on his bed. Bill shot up, knocking the figure to the ground.

"Ouch," the figure whined, "Not my little bottom!"

Bill took a closer look at this figure. It was a young man with platinum blonde hair and tanned skin, who was dressed in a lavender midriff baring top. The young man stood up, and pulled Bill out of bed, crying, "Hello! It's good to see you! We need to get started right away!"

Bill asked, "Who are you?"

The figure cheerfully replied, "I am the Ghost of Christmas Past!"

Bill said, "I don't have time for this." Just as he was about to climb back into bed, his head was whacked by a strange, metal object. Bill whirled around, to see the Ghost brandishing a golden stick. "Oh, fine. I'll go!"

The Ghost cheered, and with one finger snap, brought up an old scene from Bill's childhood. "This is what made you hate Christmas," the Ghost said.

A young version of Bill happily skipped throughout Target, clutching several toys. Suddenly, he saw a man dressed in a red suit, wearing a red hat, with long white hair. "Santa!" The young Bill ran up to 'Santa', and grabbed his arm.

'Santa' turned around, and cried, "Get out of here, you little brat!" Bill cried, and his mother came over. After reprimanding 'Santa', she took Bill home.

Bill scoffed, "Why should I believe in a child's -" He was interrupted by the Ghost hitting him on the head with the Millennium Rod yet again.

The Ghost wagged his finger in Bill's face, and said, "No way, Jose!"

"BILL!"

"It's a friggin' saying," The Ghost pouted, "But there is more!" He snapped his fingers again, and the scene shifted to a dance. "When you were a teenager," the Ghost said in a nasally voice, "You met the love of your life… BARBIE!"

Bill saw a teen version of himself dancing with a Barbie doll. The Ghost sighed, and said, "But you let her go." The scene changed yet again to an angry Bill and a crying Barbie.

"Bill," Barbie cried, "It was a mistake! I'll never do it again!"

Bill yelled, "I don't care. GET OUT!" And with that, Barbie ran off, crying. The scene went back to Bill's bedroom in the storeroom.

Bill snorted, and asked, "And why do you think that I would believe an effeminate young man who wears midriff baring shirts?"

The Ghost replied, "You don't have to. But two more spirits are going to arrive, and they are much awesomer than me!" Suddenly, a pink horse with a curly pink mane and blue eyes arrived. The Ghost said, "Oh, there's my ride." He jumped onto the horse, and yelled, "Onwards, Pinkie Pie! To Egypt!" And with that, they were off.

Bill muttered, "Weirdo," and went to sleep.

**_Later that night…_**

Bill was awoken yet again by a strange noise. After following it, he found the source. It was a boy the same age as the last ghost attempting to steal toys. Bill shouted, "THIEF! I'll call the police on you, you little ruffian!"

The boy turned around, and in a familiar accent, said, "Dere you are! It's time ta have an audience with da Ghost of Christmas Present, which happens ta be me!"

Bill snorted. "Don't be ridiculous. You're one of those kids that hangs around here!" Suddenly, the Ghost threw a My Little Pony playset at Bill's head. "Okay, okay," Bill begged, "You're the Ghost of Christmas Present! Don't give me a damn concussion, okay? You win!"

The Ghost grabbed Bill's hand, and in the blink of an eye, they were in front of a house. Then, the Ghost said, "Look inside."

Bill snuck a peek inside of the window. He immediately recognized who it was. "That's Frank," Bill realized.

Frank was sitting on one end of a dining room table, while his family was huddled at the other end. Joey told him, "Ever since Frank became a zombie, his own family was too scared ta even talk ta him."

Bill crossed his arms. "Why should I care?"

Joey yelled, "Exactly! You didn't do anything ta help da broad!"

Bill yelled, "That's it! I want to go home!"

As if the gods had heard his wishes, the two had returned home. The Ghost warned, "Beware! Da next Ghost will arrive soon, and he is da most powerful of all!" Then, he disappeared.

Bill breathed a sigh of relief, and jumped back into bed.

**_Later that night…_**

Bill was awoken this time by a strange chill. He sat up in bed, and saw fog surrounding his bed. At the side of his bed, however, was a figure cloaked in black, with long white hair hanging past his shoulders. A black hood shrouded his face, and around his neck was a golden ring with a triangle in the center. In his hand, he carried a scythe.

Bill said, "Let me guess. You're the Ghost of Christmas Future."

The Ghost said in a chilling voice, "Indeed, I am. Come, for I am about to scare you into believing whatever I say."

Bill asked, "And if I don't?" He looked up, and saw an axe hanging over his head. The manager groaned, and took the Ghost's hand.

The fog lifted, and revealed a scene in an abandoned area. Bill asked, "Why are we here?" Suddenly, he saw a sign that read, _This was the former sight of Target. Coming Soon: Necessities R Us!_

The Ghost told him, "In the future, you fired that Frank bloke for taking the day off for Christmas. Soon, he became the most powerful man in the world, and created 'Necessities R Us', which outsold Target. It closed, and you," he said, pointing to an abandoned alleyway, "You became a bloody hobo."

Bill saw the future version of him in dirty clothes, sitting in a cardboard box. The sight of this made Bill shriek, "NO! I'll change! I like Christmas! I don't want to be a hobo!"

The Ghost tossed his head, and laughed wickedly. Then, he let go of Bill's hand, going back to Bill's storeroom bedroom. As the fog reappeared, the Ghost retreated, saying, "I thought that you would bloody say that." When the fog rose, the Ghost had left.

Bill looked at the rising sun, and knew what he had to do.

**_Meanwhile…_**

Marik, Joey, Yami, and Bakura watched as Bill reluctantly told Frank that he - and everybody else - would be able to take the day off. Marik turned to the others, and said, "Well, I believe that this was a triumph! I'm making a note here, huge success."

Bakura pulled the hood of his cloak down, revealing his face. He said, "Marik, will you stop quoting bloody Portal?"

Joey cheered, "We did it! We made dat manager believe in Christmas!"

Yami facepalmed. Then, he asked, "Why did I agree to this?"

**_And now for the stinger!_**

Marik:

_All you have to do is take a cup of flour,_

_Add it to the mix!_

_Now just take a little something sweet, not sour,_

_A bit of salt, just a pinch!_

_Baking these treats is such a cinch,_

_Add a teaspoon of vanilla,_

_Add a little more, and you count to four,_

_And you never get your fill of…_

_Cupcakes, so sweet and tasty!_

_Cupcakes, don't be too hasty!_

_Cupcakes!_

_Cupcakes, cupcakes, CUPCAKES!_

Bakura asked, "Marik, what does that have to do with Christmas?"

Marik replied, "NOTHING AT ALL!

**_Merry Early Christmas! I hope you enjoyed the Christmas Special! And if you didn't understand, Marik, Bakura, Joey, and Yami pranked Bill a la A Christmas Carol into believing in Christmas. And yeah! Hope you like it!_**

**_EDIT: Sorry people! There was an accident where I cloned the story. It should be fixed now._**

**_~Sailorblaze_**


	54. Hey, What Happened To The Naming Format?

_** HAPPY NEW YEARS! Have a chapter. I don't own this list.**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! It's fixed.**_

_**Arietta Fenton – Phantom: THANKS! We'll see…**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS! It's fixed. But Marik was already Christmas Past!**_

Opposite Bakura: I like puppies!

Bakura: O _ o He's bloody creepy, and that says something.

_**Shadowcharmerdemon: THANKS! Wait, Grace is a Sue?**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! That might not be good. :I**_

_**PrankK1ng: THANKS! It's closed by now.**_

_**Maximumride123: THANKS! EPIC BROHOOF TIME!**_

_**Phil The Persona Guy: THANKS! I know it was your favorite! :)**_

MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! You're a Pegasister that likes My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic?

_**ScarletBlackberry of the M.B.S.: THANKS! Marik was the Ghost of Past; it wouldn't make sense. Eeyup.**_

"What the bloody hell did you do to my hair? It's a bloody rainbow!"

_**FangandIggyRule: THANKS! But we already had Marik as a Ghost! :( **_

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! Yes people, PM Scae on Fanfiction dot net about the TV Tropes Page if you want to help her! Yeah, he's imprisoned by it. **_

Simple: We blackmailed him!

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS!**_

_**Vampiressbeauty20: THANKS! **_

"NEVER!"

_**Here's the hair dye if you need it…**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Well, Yami has the puzzle, which is equal to Marley's chains. And as for the Ghost, I don't know.**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! I know.**_

_**Nameless Sky: THANKS! Bakura is not a very sane spirit. He's quite insane, actually.**_

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! Now, happy New Year!**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! Maybe I'll have them do an MST of it after this fic.**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! NO. **_

_**Kiterious: THANKS!**_

"What did you say?"

_**Begecko: THANKS! I'll consider it.**_

_**Marilynjayfreak: THANKS! I am!**_

_** I don't own Gives You Hell, Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged, My Little Pony, Harry Potter, the Doofenshmirtz Jingle, or My Immortal.**_

_When you see my face,_

_Hope it gives you hell,_

_Hope it gives you hell_

_When you walk my way,_

_Hope it gives you hell,_

_Hope it gives you hell_

_If you find a man that's worth a damn and treats you well,_

_Then he's a fool you're just as well,_

_Hope it gives you hell!_

When our 'pwotagonists' entered Target today, it was nearly empty. Marik asked, "Bakura, why the frig is nobody here today?"

Bakura shrugged, and replied, "How am I supposed to bloody know?" He pulled out the list, and read, "Number 154: Dress up as an emo kid, then scream at people, 'WHY HAVE YOU COME TO WORSEN MY MISERY?'"

Marik retreated into a dressing room, and came out wearing the Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way costume from Chapter 30. Bakura asked, "You still have that?"

Marik nodded. Soon, Yugi was in the store, because… well, we need somebody to be in the store. So anyway, Yugi was in the store, when Marik ran towards him, screaming, "Why have you come to worsen my misery?"

Yugi raised an eyebrow. "Are you okay?"

Marik continued with, "Why couldn't Satan make me less sexy? It's a friggin' curse!"

Yugi backed off, slowly. Then, he ran off. Marik shrugged, randomly got back into his normal clothing, and went back to Bakura. Bakura crossed off the step, and read, "Number 155: Dress up as a ninja and go around the store karate chopping people."

_**Meanwhile…**_

Joey was in the My Little Pony section. He yelled, "Hey, I'm back in da story!" Suddenly, a ninja popped out of nowhere.

Joey yelled, "NYEH!" and ran off. Marik came out, and cried, "Great job, Bakura!"

Bakura came up from behind, and said, "What do you bloody mean? I was right here behind you all along!"

Marik looked at Bakura. Then, he looked to the ninja. The ninja shrugged, and ran off. Bakura said, "Well, that was just pointless." He pulled out the list, crossed off the step, and read, "Number 156: Ride a horse on a stick toy thing and have your friend pull you around the store on a skateboard while you scream, 'The British are coming! The British are coming!'"

_**Soon…**_

Bakura struggled to pull Marik, who was on a little horse, yelling, "RUN! The British are coming!"

A man yelled, "Where?"

Marik pointed at Bakura, saying, "He is the British!"

There was an awkward silence. Then, a man yelled, "Dude, you aren't funny anymore!"

Marik yelled, "Get out of this store!"

The man groaned, and said, "Well, fine! You know what? I'm going to Wal-Mart! Nobody goes pranking there!"

Others left the store, groaning as well, leaving Marik and Bakura in the store. Marik yelled, "HOW DARE THEY!"

Bakura said, "Marik-"

Marik continued, "They will know better than to leave me! BAKURA! Tomorrow, we shall go to Wal-Mart!"

Bakura groaned. "Well, this is just bloody great."

_**Meanwhile…**_

_Bill the Manager in his office!  
><em>

The phone started to ring. Bill picked it up, and said, "Hello?"

On the other line, the manager of Wal-Mart said, "Hello, Bill. We have lots of people here."

"So?"

The manager of Wal-Mart continued. "Well, they are saying that they came from Target."

Bill yelled, "WHAT?" He hung up, and stomped out. Suddenly, Bill saw Marik and Bakura about to leave. Bill grabbed Marik's shoulder, and demanded, "Where are you going?"

Marik turned around, and replied, "Well, home. Then tomorrow, we're going to Wal-Mart. Everybody else went there, after all."

Suddenly, Bill got an awful, terrible idea. He said, "Young man, your pranking is what may be the key to saving my store at this very moment!"

Mari asked, "Say what?"

Bill said, "If you go prank Wal-Mart, they'll have to return to Target! Then, my store will be safe!"

Bakura shook his head. "All that will get you is a bloody lawsuit. And didn't we already have a farfetched plan last chapter?"

Marik told him, "If you remember, that 'farfetched' plan worked! Who's to say that this wouldn't work as well?"

Bakura facepalmed. Things were now going to be 11 times more idiotic now.

_**And now for the stinger!**_

Marik held a beach ball in his hands. Under his breath, he counted backwards from ten. When he got to zero, Marik dropped the ball, and yelled, "HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

_** IMPORTANT: We've had 54 chapters this year. Let's give ourselves a hand! Now, it's time to answer an important question: from Chapters 1 to 54, what was your favorite of all? You can even answer with story arcs, such as Bakura betraying Marik (45 – 48), Marik having Singaporitis, (40 – 41), and the time that they were mad at one another (32 – 33). Before answering this, quickly read through the other chapters if you need to refresh your memory on what happened. Have a happy New Years!**_

_**~Sailorblaze**_


	55. In Which They Go To Walmart

_** Hey guys, remember Psycho Bakura? He's back this chapter. I don't own this list, let's begin!**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! HILARIOUS? It was horrifying!**_

_**PrankK1ng: THANKS! Yeah, and it was a subtle one, too. Props to you!**_

_**Phil The Persona Guy: THANKS! Who is Snowball? And Okami reference? Where?**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! So… Welcome to the herd, MutantEnenmy6789!**_

_**Milleniummonkey23: THANKS! Why?**_

_**Zukofan2005: THANKS! You need something stronger?**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! And it will get insaner.**_

_**Marilynjayfreak: Why can't you do it?**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! What makes those your favorites?**_

_**FangandIggyRule: THANKS! Yeah, that would definitely happened. I survived, though. :) **_

_**Begecko: THANKS! I see.**_

_**Vampiressbeauty20: THANKS! Also, when will you update your fanfic with BlackRose? Pinkie is just dying for her cameo.**_

_**Angelucie: THANKS! I thought that you hated the Fangirl Ghost!**_

(Opposite Melvin and Ryou walk in.)

Opposite Melvin: I like fluffy bunnies and skipping through meadows!

Opposite Ryou: DIE.

_**Maximumride123: THANKS! May the Rainbow Dash be with you!**_

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! Yuma's reappearing this chapter.**_

_**Shadowcharmerdemon: THANKS! You're not a Sue? (gives her a Bakura fluffball) Enjoy, Grace.**_

_**Rinnu500: THANKS!**_

"Pet me if you bloody dare. (hisses)"

How much more midriff bearing are we talking here?

_**Seabreeze27: THANKS! That's a step.**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! We'll find out! Psychokura is reappearing this chapter!**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! Okay, I will.**_

_**Raspberry 14: THANKS! Love those quotes. :D**_

_**ScarletBlackberry of the M.B.S.: THANKS!**_

"That. Didn't. HELP."

_** I don't own Yu-Gi-OH, Yu-Gi-OH Abridged, Gives You Hell, Hershey's, the ASDFmovies, Portal 2, or the Slenderman.**_

_When you see my face,_

_Hope it gives you hell,_

_Hope it gives you hell_

_When you walk my way,_

_Hope it gives you hell,_

_Hope it gives you hell_

_If you find a man that's worth a damn and treats you well,_

_Then he's a fool you're just as well,_

_Hope it gives you hell!_

Today was the worst day of Bakura's life. Why was it the worst day of Bakura's life? Well, let me tell all.

That morning, Bakura and Marik sat in the Marikmobile, which was heading to Wal-Mart instead of Target. Marik had struck a deal with Bill to get back his customers in Wal-Mart by pranking in Wal-Mart. On the way, the trunk started rumbling.

Bakura asked, "Marik, what is going on?"

Marik replied, "How the frig am I supposed to know?

Once the car parked in Wal-Mart, they went to the trunk, and opened it. Suddenly, Yuma popped out of the trunk, and crash-landed on top of Bakura.

"HEY!" Yuma yelled, "RIDING IN THE TRUNK WAS REALLY EXTREEEEEME! CAN I DO THE LIST WITH YOU? PLEASE?"

Bakura asked, "If you do it, will you never talk again?"

Yuma shrieked, "NOT TALKING IS PRETTY EXTREEEE-"

Marik interrupted, "He means 'yes'. Now will you take out that friggin' notepad already? FRIG!"

Bakura took out the notebook, and read, "Number 157: Turn a cart over and put towels over it so they can't see in. When someone starts to open it, start yelling 'Hey, I'm using the bathroom in here!'"

Marik grabbed a cart and some towels, and flipped the cart over himself. Bakura begrudgingly took the towels, and placed them over the cart.

Soon, Mokuba walked over, and tried to remove the towels off of the cart. Marik shrieked, "Will you go the frig away? I'm trying to be mope here!"

Mokuba screamed in terror, and ran off crying. Marik threw off the cart, causing it to nearly crash into Bakura. After jumping out of the way, Bakura crossed off the step, and read, "Number 158: Buy a chocolate bar, go to the bathroom, smear chocolate on your hand, reach under the next stall and ask, 'Can I have some toilet paper?'"

Marik handed Yuma a Hershey's bar, and Yuma went into the bathroom. After doing the pre-steps, Yuma reached over, and yelled, "I WANT SOME TOILET PAPER!"

The man in the stall screamed, and ran out. Yuma grinned in a satisfactory manner, and ran out. He yelled in Bakura's face, "THAT WAS REALLY EXTREEEEEME!"

Bakura asked, "Will you just shut up?"

"NOOO!"

Bakura sighed, and pulled out the list, and crossed off Number 158. Then, he read, "Number 159: Take a fishing pole, tie it to a dollar, and go fishing for humans!"

Soon, Marik and Yuma were on a shelf, fishing for humans. Yuma cried, "HEY! THIS IS EXTREME! LET'S DO THIS EVERYDAY!"

Marik tried to tune Yuma out, as he went fishing. Suddenly, the Slenderman appeared, and asked, "Heeey guuys. Caaan Iiii-"

"NO!" And with that, the Slenderman walked away, dejected. Suddenly, Yuma pulled up Bakura on a hook.

Suddenly, the same man from last chapter spotted that, and yelled, "That boy has hung a man! Let's go to Target! Nobody gets hanged there!

The customers screamed, and ran out of the store. Marik yelled, "SUCCESS! Let us pet the kitty!"

And so, Marik and Yuma started petting Bakura. Bakura was purring at first, but soon, he growled ferociously, and threw Yuma into a wall, knocking the latter out.

Marik asked, "Fluffy? Are you okay?"

Bakura growled in a raspier voice, "Marik, you gave me the worst bloody day ever."

"BUT HOW?" Marik knew that Bakura had not acted like this for many chapters. However, he had hoped to himself that Bakura's psycho tendencies had only worn off.

Bakura said, "First, you let that bloody idiot Yuma come along. Then, you threw a cart at me, and hung me from a fishing pole. And then, you started petting me." Bakura grabbed Marik from the shirt, and hissed, "And trust me, your death will not be pretty."

Marik yelled, "But I'm too friggin' sexy to die horribly!"

Bakura smirked. "Well, isn't that the bloody point?" 

Marik started to shriek, causing Bakura to cover his ears in pain. Soon, Bakura yelled, "MARIK! Stop this nonsense!"

Marik stopped, and asked, "Bakura, why the frig did you go psycho again?"

Bakura asked, "How am I supposed to know?"

_**And now for the stingers!**_

"I like singing!" Marik yelled.

"I like dancing!" Tea cried.

Bakura smirked. "I like Zorc," he said.

Suddenly, Zorc stomped on Tea and Marik. He boomed, "I am a Zorc-osaurus!"

_**(LINE BREAK)  
><strong>_

Yusei stared at the screen with an unamused expression. "Do I have to say this?" he asked.

The caption read, _Yes, Yusei_.

Yusei sighed. Then, he shrugged, and said, "Card Games on Motorcycles."

Jack yelled, "CARD GAMES ON MOTORCYCLES!"

_**(LINE BREAK)**_

As a potato version of Marik and Serenity where flying towards the platform, the potato Marik said, "Well, this is the part where he kills us."

Suddenly, Bakura appeared on a screen, grinning sadistically. He yelled, "Hello! THIS IS THE PART WHERE I BLOODY KILL YOU!"

_**Part 9: The Part Where He Kills You**_

_** And that's the chapter! I was originally going to use a longer scene, but I got tired. So, hope you enjoy!**_


	56. In Which A Fangirl Joins Our Heroes

_**I'm baaack… And Mr. Billany… I EXIST! COME FIND ME! I'LL BE WAITING!**_

_**PhilThePersonaGuy: THANKS! Who can make sweaters for all of China?**_

_**MutantEnemy6789: THANKS! It nearly is a wonderful store if there ever was!**_

_**BlackRoseDragonCK: THANKS! EXTREEEME!**_

_**PrankK1ng: THANKS! Villains rise again! Bow your heads low, all hail the psycho!**_

_**Uqluiorra12345: THANKS! Wait a moment, which one are you? ShadyVox? LK? AzureCrow? JUICEY FLANNIGAN?**_

_**Scaevola2: THANKS! It's a Portal reference. And do we still need help on the page?**_

_**DoujinGirl: THANKS! The most unlikely of pairs. (And yes, I know I did it wrong. It was when LK had the trailer for the BBT movie up, and it had no lyrics.)**_

_**Uqluiorra12345: THANKS! Go man!**_

_**ImmortalAngel92: THANKS! Oh, I see.**_

_**Seabreeze27: THANKS! I had to; they all appeared.**_

_**FangandIggyRule: THANKS! I feel sorry, too. No, I can't tell you.**_

_**TurboDuel: THANKS! Ooh, interesting. You'll see what I have planned.**_

_**Vampiressbeauty20: THANKS! I loved it. And the Softshipping. Have some potatoes!**_

_**ScarletBlackberry: THANKS! Team Foreshadow blasts off at the speed of light, surrender now or prepare to fight! Meowth, that's right! And it's raining midriffs. Audio sexiness For The Win! **_

Marik: NO YOU AREN'T!

_**Angelucie: THANKS! **_

Marik: DON'T KILL PINKIE!

Opposite Marik: Hello. I am calm. Would you like to drink a warm beverage and have a calm conversation?

_**My god…**_

_**Emichan and PhoenixWarrior: THANKS! Can't tell you. **_

Bakura: (raspier voice) I'll kill him… and Marik.

_**Maximumride123: THANKS! I had writer's block, until I took a Rainbow Dash to the head – (shot)**_

_**Lonewolfgirl – sademo588: THANKS! I couldn't help it.**_

_**Avalongal316: THANKS! I didn't. **_

Yuma: THEY DOOOO! 

_**YamiNoGamer69: THANKS! Oh god, I hope it doesn't do that!**_

_**Stormpiper: THANKS! Wait… YOU HAVEN'T HEARD OF YGOTAS BEFORE? Joking, I must have found LK a new fan!**_

_**Trialman AKA Soma Cruz: THANKS! Ouch. It makes sense if you think about it hard. ;)**_

_**Queen of Commas: THANKS! Love the name change. Can I have the basilisk? I'd love to name him 'Joe'.**_

_**Trialman AKA Soma Cruz: THANKS! No, that was Bad Romance. Different song. FAVORITECEPTION.**_

_**ShadowGamer69: THANKS! Darn, don't ya hate when that happens?**_

_**Marilynjayfreak: THANKS! Indeed. He is.**_

_**VORTEX2012: THANKS! Me thinks that was Jean Claude Magnum. :I**_

_**xxxDegrassigirl101xxx: THANKS! Yeah, I messed up the quote. :P**_

_**Invader Ivy: THANKS! So do I!**_

_** I don't own Yu-Gi-OH, Yu-Gi-OH Abridged, this list, Everything You Know Is Wrong, Jingle Bells, I Believe I Could Fly, or fangirls.**_

_Everything you know is wrong,_

_Black is white, up is down and short is long,_

_And everything you thought was just so,_

_Important doesn't matter;_

_Everything you know is wrong,_

_Just forget the words and sing along,_

_All you need to understand is_

_Everything you know is wrong!_

"ARE YOU FRIGGIN' KIDDING ME?" Marik yelled.

The executive producer sitting in front of them adjusted his eyeglasses. "Sorry, but it's true. Everyone at Monochrome Cow Studios wants you to have a third teammate."

Bakura tried to set the record by saying, "But we don't _need _a third teammate."

"Yeah!" Marik yelled.

"Too bad, I'm the exec," the producer said, "And now to introduce you to your teammate. Gwendolyn?"

A super sexy girl with long blonde hair that touched the floor, emerald green eyes, and wore clothing that could rival Marik's entered. This girl yelled in a voice as melodious as a dove's, "HI! I'm Gwendolyn Gold! And I'm in love with Marik!"

Marik asked, "Do I even know you?"

The producer yelled, "Okay, here she is. NOW GO!"

_**At Target…**_

The group of three exited the Marikmobile and into Target. Marik pulled out the list, and read, "Number 160: Climb up to one of the really high shelves and start singing Christmas carols at the top of your lungs. Works better around summer. I'll-"

"Actually, I'd like to do it," Gwendolyn shyly said.

"Sure, why not?" Bakura replied, rolling his eyes.

Gwendolyn climbed to the highest shelf, and sung:

_Jingle Bells,_

_Jingle Bells,_

_Jingle all the way!_

_Oh what fun it is to ride in a one horse open sleigh!_

_HEY!_

When she sung, her voice was as musical as a clogged tuba. Seto Kaiba, who was walking by, yelled, "YOU IDIOT! It's the beginning of February!"

Marik replied, "Who **EFF!**ing cares?"

When Gwendolyn climbed down from the highest shelf, Bakura pulled out the list, and read, "Number 161: Get a mirror and put it on top of a cart so it lay across it. Get on top and have someone push you down an isle, and Sing 'Surfin' USA'. I think we did this already."

"Wait!" Gwendolyn yelled, "I have an idea on what to do!"

_**Soon…**_

"This is so friggin' humiliating," Marik complained as he pulled the cart along with Bakura.

"Try doing it for most of these chapters," Bakura replied unsympathetically.

On top of the cart was Gwendolyn, who sung in her clogged tuba singing voice:

_I believe I can fly…_

_I believe I can touch the sky…_

_I think about it every night and day,_

_Spread my wings and fly away!_

_I believe I can soar…_

_I see me running through that open door…_

_I believe I can fly!_

_I believe I can fly!_

_I believe I can fly!_

"What a terrible singer!" Marik yelled, "I could sing much better than her!" He jumped onto the surfboard, and sung:

_See I was on the verge of breaking down,_

_Sometimes silence can seem so loud,_

_There are miracles in life I must achieve,_

_But first I know it starts inside of me, oh!_

_If I can see it, then I can be it,_

_If I just believe it, there's nothing to it!_

Bakura groaned, and covered his ears. They got off of the cart, with several of the shoppers at Target dea- I mean, in the Shadow Realm.

Bakura took out the list, and read, "Number 162: When the intercom comes on, fall on your knees and scream in tears of joy, "God has spoken!"

Marik stood in the center of the store, and waited for the intercom. Finally, Bill's voice came on the intercom, saying, "Will Frank the Gullible Target Employee please report to the-"

"HOLY FRIG!" Marik yelled, "God has spoken!"

Several people in Target raised an eyebrow, and walked off. Gwendolyn yelled, "We did the list!" and glomped Marik.

Marik started complaining about being unable to breathe. Bakura felt his sadistic streak starting to return… that is, until Melvin showed up.

Melvin got up, and asked, "Okay, who tried to cut off my air supply? I'm only allowed to do that to others!"

Bakura nervously pointed at Gwendolyn, who was idly sitting on the floor. Melvin walked up to Gwendolyn, and asked, "Hug?"

Gwendolyn jumped up, and cried, "Anything for you, Marik!"

_**Several hours later…**_

Melvin turned back into Marik, who cried, "GAH! Why am I covered in blood?" 

Bakura facepalmed. "Melvin."

Marik replied, "But he hasn't appeared in a million years!"

Bakura shrugged. "At least the rabid fangirl is gone."

Marik nodded. "No thanks to the Pharaoh, of course!"

Bakura asked Marik, "Where was he this chapter, anyway?'

"Who the frig cares?"

_**And now for the stingers!**_

While this chapter was going on, Yami faced a milkshake-making machine. This was very serious. "Milkshake machine, I have had enough with you and your kind. This ends now!"

The machine stood there, as it was inanimate. Yami hit the milkshake machine, which knocked it down. Yami declared, "YES! Now, all milkshakes shall go to milkshake prison!

_**(LINE BREAK)**_

Marik pointed to the PowerPoint he was playing. "So, my movie is going to involve the sexy Kiram Rathsi and his girlfriend Arukab fighting an evil Pharaoh that possesses the body of an 8 year old boy named Iguy. At the end, they fight him on motorcycles… with card games!"

"ON MOTOR-"

"Shut the frig up!" Marik yelled. He continued, "So, the Pharaoh is dragged to the Shadow Realm, and Kiram and Arukab have a party! What do you think, Bakura?"

Bakura was silent. Then, he said, "First off, the protagonist's names are our names backwards. Secondly, it makes no bloody sense."

Marik yelled, "Don't stifle my creativity, Fluffy!" 

_** Yeah, I apologize if there's a lack of funny. I got back from an unscheduled hiatus, and need to polish up my comedy. Well, see ya around!**_


	57. One Last Note

_**I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged, My Little Pony, or Doctor Who.**_

_And now it's time for an important message from Sailorblaze._

Well, I never thought it was going to come to this. I thought I would be able to complete every chapter. I thought that you would finally be able to see what happened to Bakura.

Unfortunately, I'm faced with a terrible reality. And it is that I must tell you that until further notice, Marik and Bakura: 333 Ways is proclaimed…

**DEAD.**

Now, why did I choose this?

**1. Lack of motivation. **I'm just so busy these days. These fics take time, and I usually can't come up with one chapter over a night, or as you saw, they are TERRIBLE. DOWNRIGHT FREAKING TERRIBLE. As in, 'hardly anyone thinks it's funny terrible'. And I'm aware of this. I don't want terribleness. But it's not long until one gets tired of the Brony references and songs.

**2. It got too boring. **Honestly, this fic got reeeaaally repetitive and boring. There's only so much you can do with the concept of 'Marik takes Bakura to Target to humiliate the Pharaoh after discovering a dumb list.' Even the humor won't save it if it's too boring/formulative.

**3. Lack of interest. **I've kind of left the Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged fandom. I'll still watch it, but I won't really write any Yu-Gi-Oh from now on. I'll do Friendship is Magic or when I get adjusted to the series, Doctor Who.

I'll tell you what, though. If any of you guys are ticked at me for closing this fic before we even found out what happened to Bakura or anything like that, PM me. I'll tell you all what I was planning to happen.

For now, I'd like to thank you all for being with me. C'mon guys! GROUP HUG! We've been through so very much!

And I'm not kidding. I'm sorry it had to be this way. Things just don't work out for everyone, you know?

We may be dead, but hopefully I'll get that TV Tropes page someday.

**XOXO,**

**Sailorblaze**


	58. What's This! ONE LAST CHAPTER!

_**So, I decided to show you a little mini epilogue for Marik and Bakura: 333 Ways as for something that happened during the switch from my fic to YamiTheDark's. WARNING: Avengers Spoilers Abound. If you want to see it and haven't, turn off your computer, go see the Avengers, and come back to read this fic. Again, these are the abridged versions of the characters. **_

_**I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh, Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged, Joss Whedon, Twizzlers, Coca Cola, ICEE, Ice Age: Continental Drift, The Amazing Spiderman and the Avengers.**_

* * *

><p><em>Chapter 56 12: In Which They Take A Movie Break_

"Holy. Friggin'. God," Marik stated, "That. Was. EPIC!" Marik and Bakura had just left the movie theater showcasing Marvel's big damn movie, The Avengers, throwing out popcorn and sneaking off with their 3-D glasses. Marik was in total awe. Bakura ... was not.

"Marik, that was a mediocre movie and you know that!" Bakura argued.

Marik gasped in horror. "HOW COULD YOU EVEN SAY THAT?! You'll make Joss Whedon angry! And you don't like him when he's angry!"

Bakura raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure you're not talking about that Banner fellow?"

"I AM VERY SURE!" Marik yelled, "The only part I didn't like was Loki's evil plan. I mean, he brainwashes Clinty Birdman-"

"Hawkeye, Marik. Not 'Clinty Birdman'."

"NO ONE CARES!" Marik glared at Bakura, angry at the latter for interrupting his speech. "Anyway, he brainwashes Clinty Birdman and that scientist from Thor, makes the Avengers moan, attack and bitch at each other for the hell of it, kills people, and causes an alien invasion all because of a glowy cube of glowy glowiness of doom! Seriously, WHAT THE FRIG?!"

"Marik, I think that Loki needed the cube for the alien invasion to begin," Bakura corrected.

"How do you know that?!" Marik demanded, "You were asleep for half of the movie!"

"No I wasn't, I was trying to make you think I was asleep."

"YES YOU WE- oh," Marik said, realizing his mistake, "MOVING ON! So, I think that I could come up with a better evil plan than Loki."

Bakura laughed for a while. "I doubt it. Really, Marik, I don't remember anybody named Steve in the mo-"

"And that is where you are WRONG, Fluffy!" Marik cried triumphantly, "For there so happens to be someone named Steve in the Avengers, and that is... Steve Rogers, aka CAPTAIN FRIGGIN' AMERICA!" Suddenly, Marik stopped in his tracks.

Bakura turned around and stared at Marik, who was looking ahead vacantly. "Marik, did you die on short notice?"

Marik suddenly snapped back to life, grinning evilly. "I think I have an eeeeevil plan that could out-Loki Loki."

Bakura smirked. "And pray tell, what is it?"

Marik stood up onto one of the benches in front of a poster for Ice Age: Continental Drift and hollered, "It's simple! First off, I need to charge the Millennium Rod. Curse you, failing batteries! Next, I turn Captain America into my personal Steve! Then, I use him to lie to the Avengers' faces about little things like 'Yo Bruce, I heard Iron Man hates your socks! As in, your actual socks on your feet!'"

"That is incredibly stupid," Bakura commented.

"SHUT UP!" Marik ordered. "Then, they will all confront each other in a huge yelling spree like in the movie, except Clinty Birdman would actually be present and NOT brainwashed. Then, I will reveal myself as the true villain I am, and force them to... PLAY A CHILDREN'S CARD GAME! DUN DUN DUUUUN!"

Bakura groaned and facepalmed. Marik then realized, "No, wait. They don't know how to play Duel Monsters. Frig! I WAS NOT EXPECTING THIS!" Suddenly, a lightbulb flashed in Marik's head. "Wait! I will make them fight against their friend who is now my mind slave! AND I WILL BE VICTORIOUS!" Marik closed his eyes and reigned in his victorious-ness.

Bakura looked behind his shoulder, his eyes suddenly widening. "Marik-"

"Quiet, Fluffy! Let me reign in my victory!"

"Marik-"

"SHUT. THE. **EFF!**. UP. FLUFFY."

"MARIK!"

"What?!" Marik asked, incredibly annoyed. Bakura pointed over to the concession stand, where a long line was beginning to form. Just outside that line were four men, who were all dressed in a very familiar manner. Said manner was concerning the movie that the duo had just seen. All of them were staring at Marik and Bakura blankly.

"**EFF! **no! It's the **EFF!**ing Avengers! We're **EFF!**ing **EFF!**ed!" Marik screamed as he jumped onto Bakura's back. "SAVE ME, BAKUUUURA!" Bakura groaned and slowly walked out of the movie theater. Marik kicked him, yelling "GO FASTER!"

"Marik, I'm going as fast as I bloody can!" Bakura protested.

"Not fast enough, Limey!" Marik yelled, kicking Bakura again.

The four men watched as Marik and Bakura fled the movie theater. The one in the red and yellow metal armor cried, "What the hell just happened?"

"Looks like someone thought we were the actual Avengers," The man dressed as Captain America suggested.

"Okay, really?" The 'man' dressed as Thor added, "Just because we resemble the actual actors and actually put effort into these costumes does NOT mean that the Avengers exist! I can attest to that; I'm a girl!"

"We're aware," a man in a purple button down shirt said.

"Wait. Who are you supposed to be?" The Iron Man cosplayer asked, pointing at Purple-shirt-guy.

"Bruce Banner."

Before that discussion could go any further, a couple dressed as Hawkeye and Black Widow arrived carrying a tray of popcorn, Twizzlers, ICEEs, Coca Colas, and nachos. "Hey, we got the food," the Black Widow cosplayer announced.

"In that case, AVENGERS ASSEMBLE!" The Captain America cosplayer yelled, "And let's go see... _THE AMAZING SPIDERMAN_!" Everyone stared at him in confusion, and an awkward silence swept the six cosplayers. "What? Avengers was sold out, and I had to switch on short notice!"

_**That was just a short and sweet oneshot from me to you. BTW, I want to take this moment to announce that YAMI THE DARK has a continuation of this fic on her page. Check it out! AND ENJOY THANKSGIVING!**_


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